Jonesing like a motherfucker

Hey everyone how's it going? I'm not doing too good. I had to quit weed about a year ago because I had a psychotic episode and now I'm on medication. I didn't care for the first nine months because I was so heavily medicated but now I really miss toking. I used to smoke a lot too, about four or five times a day for about two years. I'm 18 and I started when I was 15. And I really miss getting high, there's so many great things I miss about it. The good buds, the way they smelled, their texture, their look. And smoking, filling my lungs up with skunky smoke, doing cool little tricks like blowing rings or french inhales, and watching the smoke dance around in the air as I exhaled. Being high or stoned was the best though, laughing with my friends just chilling, sitting alone on my bed listening to music, but the best was the afterglow which I always got. And I miss hanging out with my dealer, he was a good friend but my parents made me stop seeing him. I really want to smoke but I have no connections and I probably shouldn't anyway. So what do you suggest I do? I've been trying to exercise more which makes me feel better and I've been doing more chores around the house but I still miss that reefer.

just ask some people, they should either have, or know, or know someone where you could get some, but just take it easy man, see how you react, then increase if things are alright

also if your 18, go hang out with your dealer, your old enough to make your own decisions by this time

I don't know anybody else and I don't have a car to drive to the city to get anything. And I forgot my dealer's cell number and I think he'd probably be mad at me for not hanging out with him anymore. He probably thinks I only hung out for the weed which isn't true. Although I know his dad so I'll just ask him for his number. And my parents never cared that I smoked, they let me because they know it makes me happy but they don't want me to now. I don't want to disobey my parents or disappoint them.

well if you want to, i would say go and do it. and i dont think your dealer would be mad, just explain your situation, he will understand.. call a friend up or somethin and go with him or hr to whereever, then ask around for a dime

You're right he would probably understand. And I don't have any friends.:(

well is there anyone from school you get along with? just talk to or anything like that?? start there, see where that takes you, ask them if they want to go hang out or something, and if you tell your parents your going to go hang out with some people, i think they will suport you more then anything, and maybe even let you take their car into town or somethin