Please help with life altering decision

[VaporDaddy]

Hi, I am hoping some of you can help me make a huge life altering decision. First I will tell you a little about my situation. I am 30 yrs old, married with 2 kids ages 1 and 3. I have been working in a factory for about 10 years now doing a job that I hate but I have stayed there because of the great pay, benefits and time off. Before I took this job I was a Chef. I enjoyed the work but not the hours and the pay was terrible.
Well now the company I am working for is downsizing and offering very substantial buyouts(more than a years salary). I think this is my opportunity to get out of this job that I despise so much, however I don't want to go back into cooking for fear of never seeing my kids.
I think the solution is to start a whole new career, but I am stuck as to what to do. I am an artist at heart and I would love to learn a new skill/craft but what will pay the bills? If you have any suggestions or advice I would love to hear it.
Thank you

[ncnavguy]

Of course it all depends on the job market where you live, but from personal experience when a company is downsizing, if you don't take the buy-out then a few monthes down the road they'll just fire you and give you nothing. I would take the money and run 1 yrs salary up front should give you the security to make sure your family is okay for a while, you can even invest a portion of it to bring back interest while you seek new employment. As far as finding what you want, can you go to school in your area?
Good Luck man,

[Zimzum]

I would say take it and look for a new job. You should be able to find something to suit you before your payment runs dry. If you get something in a week, then your buyout is just a nice fat bonus.

[stinkyattic]

Sup VaporDaddy...
I hae a suggestion... sort of depends upon the demographic of your home turf, if it is affluent enough to support this...
PERSONAL CHEF!
Not catering, for which you need a catering license and a location separate from your home kitchen.
Personal chefs go to peoples' homes and use ingredients that the client provides, in THEIR space, to get around pesky board of health regulations.
I have gone to a couple parties catered by personal chefs, and it was wonderful, like going to the filming of a TV cooking show!
With the buyout, you could get enough time to get set up and get together with an agent (hahaha seriously, they have agents who do the advertising!).
I know how shitty it is to be a restaurant chef and not get home until 2am, 6 or even 7 days a week.
Just something to think about. It would give you a fabulous outlet for your creativity.

[VaporDaddy]

Of course it all depends on the job market where you live, but from personal experience when a company is downsizing, if you don't take the buy-out then a few monthes down the road they'll just fire you and give you nothing. I would take the money and run 1 yrs salary up front should give you the security to make sure your family is okay for a while, you can even invest a portion of it to bring back interest while you seek new employment. As far as finding what you want, can you go to school in your area?
Good Luck man,

Thank you so much. Yes I am 99% sure I am going to take the money and yes I can get re-educated but I can't decide for what. I see this as a huge opportunity to have a rewarding and fullfilling career. I want to be excited about getting to work every day, and be financially secure but I am having trouble finding the right vocation.

[The Figment]

I can't suggest any one thing (art or craft) that would pay the bills as well as a good paying factory job with bennies,but take the buyout.as ncnavguy says the chances are that layoffs will follow down the road.
As far as future employment goes,my dad one time told me...

"You have to work,there is no way around it.You have two choices in life,1 go get a job that pays the bills and allows you to stash some,tho you will most likely hate it or 2 find out what it is that you LOVE doining ,learn that so well that you become better than anyone at it,this way its not work,its play! and if you get better than anyone else at whatever you do the money will follow"

Sage advice!

[VaporDaddy]

Sup VaporDaddy...
I hae a suggestion... sort of depends upon the demographic of your home turf, if it is affluent enough to support this...
PERSONAL CHEF!
Not catering, for which you need a catering license and a location separate from your home kitchen.
Personal chefs go to peoples' homes and use ingredients that the client provides, in THEIR space, to get around pesky board of health regulations.
I have gone to a couple parties catered by personal chefs, and it was wonderful, like going to the filming of a TV cooking show!
With the buyout, you could get enough time to get set up and get together with an agent (hahaha seriously, they have agents who do the advertising!).
I know how shitty it is to be a restaurant chef and not get home until 2am, 6 or even 7 days a week.
Just something to think about. It would give you a fabulous outlet for your creativity.

OMG stinky, I have researched this extensively, even ordered info from personal chef associations and designed logos and menus.What do you think of the name Affordable Feasts? It is definitely an option. I love the idea of having my own business too. Thank you so much!

[stinkyattic]

OMG stinky, I have researched this extensively, even ordered info from personal chef associations and designed logos and menus.What do you think of the name Affordable Feasts? It is definitely an option. I love the idea of having my own business too. Thank you so much!
WORD
Not a bad name!
And now you have the bonus as a cushion to get you off the ground.
My father is, at age 53, currently in a similar situation where his company is being sold, or, if the sale falls through, shut down... he's got a year cushion coming to him... he's an engineer... and I suspect that for part of that year he's going to go work with a dear old friend of his from his college days who is a kinetic artist... what could have been a shitty bit of luck is turning into an opportunity to express a long-dormant creative side.

[slipknotpsycho]

if starting your own buisness doen't work out... be a mechanic... there's always a need for mechanics and they make great fucking money...

[Villui]

maybe open up ur own resturant ?

[BizzleLuvin]

my mom was in a similar boat.
she had gotten a bad case carpal tunnel from years of cleaning teeth, which she loved. she was demoted to hygeine assistant which demanded less from her hands. she hated it.
my mom worked for the same company for 11 years and cleaned teeth for about 20 something years, then got demoted to the unrespectable job of handing younger hygienists tools. so she decided to go back to school. her bosses took notice and fired her, they suspected she would lose interest in being an assistant which is a boring, demeaning job for such an experienced and talented woman.
anyway, she's now studying to be a physicians assistant becuse she loves helping people. she completed the program while assisting hygeine, making less and less mony and taking up part-time jobs when she got fired. we were basically living off my father's income for about two years.
then she landed a great job as a hygeinist at an old folks home. she worked less but got paid almost as much as she had before, cleaning old folks teeth. it demanded less work and allowed her to take time to study.
unfortunately, its been a year and a half extra of her not getting into the PA program which is ludicrous. my mother is an extremely driven, compassionate, talented, able woman who exceeds at everything she applies. its just her age ans mediocre grades she got in college 30 some years ago that deterrs employers. like i said, ludicrous.
she is now working part time and taking classes for the third time in order to erase the bad grades she got 30 years ago. we are living off my fathers income for the most part, which isnt so bad seeing as i am in college and by brother is soon to be as well.
anyway, i advise you to persue your dreams. we met many hard times but always lived thru it. my mom is proud of herself and we see a future for her now.

[benagain]

Well whatever you do, good luck :thumbsup:

[VaporDaddy]

maybe open up ur own resturant ?

This has always been a dream for me but with 2 young kids...impossible. Mabey later on in life.:jointsmile:

[evan5502]

I would definately take the money, to me that would be like winning the lottery. But I dont know how tough it is to find a good job in the real world so dont listen to me.

[NextLineIsMine]

I say go for it man, as scary as they can be we sometimes need to make some radical changes. Who wants to spend their life doing something they hate? Something like 55% of Americans are in jobs they hate but do them simply because they are afraid to leave the relative security they have at the time.

The payout should easily keep you on your feet long enough to get comfy with something new

[napolitana869]

I like the name you came up with. Who doesnt want a feast?

[Fengzi]

You sound a lot like me VaporDaddy. I also love to cook and have dreamed of being a chef. Also, like you, one of the big things that has kept me away was the thought of the hours and basically never seeing my family again. Fortunately though, I have a pretty good job which I don't hate but..well..let's just say that if I won the lottery I'd be gone in a flash.

One other thing you may look into, like Villui already mentioned is opening your own resturant. To avoid the dreaded "chef's hours", however, you might think of going lunch only. Depending on where you live and the industry around you, this might be a pretty good option. I work in the middle of the Silicon Valley in an area dominated by the high tech industry and shitloads of office buildings. There are quite a few lunch only places around and they do a booming business. They key is locating yourself in an area that has enough lunch time traffic to make it viable. Also, I've noticed that these places do best when they have some kind of catch, something sepcial that differentiates them from the rest and brings more customers in.

The personal chef idea is good too, and another one I have thought of for myself. Not to sure about the name "Affordable Feasts" though. I haven't really looked into this, so you probably have more insight into the industry than me. My initial thought, however, is that the typical clientele for a personal chef would generaly be somewhat affluent. For these folks, throwing a fancy dinner party, affordability may not be as big a factor as the image obtained by having a personal chef. For someone looking for bragging rights, the "affordable" part of the name might actually be a turn-off. Then again, I might be way off. Plus, with the right marketing, you might just develop a whole new market for this service and the name "affordable feasts" would be perfect. Just something to consider.

[VaporDaddy]

You sound a lot like me VaporDaddy. I also love to cook and have dreamed of being a chef. Also, like you, one of the big things that has kept me away was the thought of the hours and basically never seeing my family again. Fortunately though, I have a pretty good job which I don't hate but..well..let's just say that if I won the lottery I'd be gone in a flash.

One other thing you may look into, like Villui already mentioned is opening your own resturant. To avoid the dreaded "chef's hours", however, you might think of going lunch only. Depending on where you live and the industry around you, this might be a pretty good option. I work in the middle of the Silicon Valley in an area dominated by the high tech industry and shitloads of office buildings. There are quite a few lunch only places around and they do a booming business. They key is locating yourself in an area that has enough lunch time traffic to make it viable. Also, I've noticed that these places do best when they have some kind of catch, something sepcial that differentiates them from the rest and brings more customers in.

The personal chef idea is good too, and another one I have thought of for myself. Not to sure about the name "Affordable Feasts" though. I haven't really looked into this, so you probably have more insight into the industry than me. My initial thought, however, is that the typical clientele for a personal chef would generaly be somewhat affluent. For these folks, throwing a fancy dinner party, affordability may not be as big a factor as the image obtained by having a personal chef. For someone looking for bragging rights, the "affordable" part of the name might actually be a turn-off. Then again, I might be way off. Plus, with the right marketing, you might just develop a whole new market for this service and the name "affordable feasts" would be perfect. Just something to consider.

Thanks for the feedback. Actually a personal chef mainly prepares meals in one day to cover a clients dinners for a week or 2. The chef prepares all the dishes and side dishes to be finished off and reheated by the client as per the chefs instructions. The main clientelle would be working families who don't have the time to cook a good dinner.:jointsmile:

[Skink]

Well if your going to make it as a personal chef you either have to be a really good chef or a great cook with personality and perseverance... jobs won't come around if you burn the quiche without a backup...

Backup Plan!!! look into some thing sure as a backup... I don't know what it is like there but here if you have a truck setup for lunch or hot dogs you can make a living,,,just a backup thought... you worked in a factory then you are probably good with your hands maybe some electrical knowledge from relays and stuff on the factory equipment... With a little DIY in your blood you can maybe think of appliance repair,,,pretty easy work and pays well...

[Villui]

This has always been a dream for me but with 2 young kids...impossible. Mabey later on in life.:jointsmile:

yeah man just wait till they get a little older :jointsmile:

[stinkyattic]

jobs won't come around if you burn the quiche without a backup...
...
lol as generations of housewives learned to avoid!
:D
I'd love to open a restaurant myself... specifically, a tapas bar and grille... never gonna happen... I'm a total fraidy-cat... so many restaurants fail.

[Skink]

I cooked all my life and I like it but,,, I can still burn something cause I seem to lose focus and focus on something else...

[Skink]

lol as generations of housewives learned to avoid!
:D
I'd love to open a restaurant myself... specifically, a tapas bar and grille... never gonna happen... I'm a total fraidy-cat... so many restaurants fail.

Man to make it work is really tough and Very Demanding forget about family unless the family is all involved of course...

[stinkyattic]

I cooked all my life and I like it but,,, I can still burn something cause I seem to lose focus and focus on something else...
hahaha let's see... can we take a stab at what THAT is? :jointsmile: <-that's a hint!!!

[surreys princess]

daddy......did you talk to your wife? i am sure she knows you very well, and can tell you what she thinks, and help you find your dreams and make some goals.... xx

[Skink]

hahaha let's see... can we take a stab at what THAT is? :jointsmile: <-that's a hint!!!
No I havn't smoked in a month and still lose focus...it's me,,,but a Big ROFLMFAO,,,good one:thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup:

[VaporDaddy]

daddy......did you talk to your wife? i am sure she knows you very well, and can tell you what she thinks, and help you find your dreams and make some goals.... xx

princess!!!!xxx
great to hear from you! Actually I talk to her all the time about it. She is very concerned with money, she's pretty materialistic (don't tell her I said that).
So if it was up to her I would be in the factory for 20 more yrs. :(

[surreys princess]

yikes.....

i guess ya better find something that cant fail, huh? nothing like pressure in these situations....

you should sit down and make a list of what you like and what you dont and why you would or wouldnt choose that..am i making sense? lists always help, at least for me...

a years salary isnt much to start with, for any career change...

unfortuantely we sometimes have to scarafice our dreams for our families in the name of practicality...bleh

xx

[stinkyattic]

Aw shit Vapordaddy, sounds like you've got a big project ahead of you, and there's a long talk with your wife that you need to have.
Look at this as an opportunity to not only change your career for the better, but to also bring more communication to your marriage.
Another thing I would look into is cooking at a college or private boarding-school... the food services there don't keep late restaurant hours... benefits are often very good... opportunities to network with caterers abound...????

[VaporDaddy]

yikes.....

i guess ya better find something that cant fail, huh? nothing like pressure in these situations....

you should sit down and make a list of what you like and what you dont and why you would or wouldnt choose that..am i making sense? lists always help, at least for me...

a years salary isnt much to start with, for any career change...

unfortuantely we sometimes have to scarafice our dreams for our families in the name of practicality...bleh

xx

Likes:
weed
sex
art
fresh baked bread


Dislikes:
monotonous work
rush hour traffic
canned peas


....hmmm...now what?

[surreys princess]

move to vancouver? :D

[stinkyattic]

Likes:
weed
sex
art
fresh baked bread
Dislikes:
canned peas

LOL @ canned peas, seriously, what moron decided to put them in a fucking CAN where they turn into useless grey mush unsuitable for human consumption?

Hmmm art... baking bread... want to be home when kids are out of school... artisan bakery!!! MMMMMMMM
Except that you have to get up and go to work at like 4:30 am... you miss rush hour traffic... and the best time of day to make love... decisions, decisions...
:D

[VaporDaddy]

LOL @ canned peas, seriously, what moron decided to put them in a fucking CAN where they turn into useless grey mush unsuitable for human consumption?

Hmmm art... baking bread... want to be home when kids are out of school... artisan bakery!!! MMMMMMMM
Except that you have to get up and go to work at like 4:30 am... you miss rush hour traffic... and the best time of day to make love... decisions, decisions...
:D

You are truly a genius! I love you. And how about canned asparagus?! WTF!
:jointsmile:

[Skink]

Your wife is just practicle,,,,if your a dreamer she is needed to level off the playing field...

[Skink]

That was a touching story and you discribed it very well... I wish your Mom the best!!!

[VaporDaddy]

Your wife is just practicle,,,,if your a dreamer she is needed to level off the playing field...

Good point, but I often wonder what my life would be like if I were to pursue my dreams unchecked. Just a thought.

[stinkyattic]

Good point, but I often wonder what my life would be like if I were to pursue my dreams unchecked. Just a thought.
It's pretty amazing how many people I'm close to have been thinking this lately... you and I are the same age... my friends are going through the first wave of divorces... everyone is starting to feel trapped in their career- I know I sort of do too... it was one of the things that made me end my last relationship... I didn't need to be trapped by anything else either...I felt like I spent the entire last year of it planning my escape... he had stopped growing (well, I don't think he matured past about 15 anyway, but...) and I still feel like I have a life ahead of me... one of the reasons I love the Yeag... he has the adventure in him still.... you need encouragement to pursue your dreams... it CAN be done... financial security and happiness are NOT mutually exclusive!

Oh, and canned asparagus is an abomination against Nature AND the palate... not as nasty as the canned peas... but compared to what asparagus SHOULD be... yow! My area is FAMOUS for our amazing tender sweet asparagus... only what, another 6-8 weeks before it heralds the start of the farm stand season, all those little perky spears showing up on trailers parked by the side of the road... just waiting to become an omlette... mmmmm leftover fondue and asparagus omlettes are like stepping into the orgasmatron.

[CUTigeRGirL]

Just an idea...Since you will get the salary for at least a years pay, maybe you could go back to school and then find a job doing something that you love. Honestly, I wish I would have went to a tech school instead of a university (4-year) because tech is a lot cheaper (virtually free if your state has the lottery or whatever). Also, there are a lot more jobs out there with a 2 year degree that pay more than one with a 4-year degree. I would take this time to reflect on what you love, spend time with your children, etc. I wouldn't rush into a job just to have money, but spend time applying and searching for better jobs. Monster.com is a good place to start. Sorry if I didn't help much...just some ideas. :) Hope they helped you!

[Breukelen advocaat]

I have not read every post here, so I apologize if these questions have been answered.

Will the company dole the pay out to you incrementally for a year? How long will medical (or other) benefits continue? After you're finished with the severance payout(s), can you go on unemployment insurance? The last option is great - you can continue to collect for at least six months.

[BizzleLuvin]

That was a touching story and you discribed it very well... I wish your Mom the best!!!

thanks. i admire my mom

[VaporDaddy]

I have not read every post here, so I apologize if these questions have been answered.

Will the company dole the pay out to you incrementally for a year? How long will medical (or other) benefits continue? After you're finished with the severance payout(s), can you go on unemployment insurance? The last option is great - you can continue to collect for at least six months.

one time payment (huge tax implications)
medical benefits end at severence (wife may be able to get benefits for family)
no employment insurance or govornment assistance

[FreeVenice]

A years pay is alot, good for investments/school/vacations. But usually when a company has something they are offering, it means that you probly could get more if you hold out. . .

After saying that, I say take the payoff, but ask for more. I mean your going to be gone eventually any how. Invest that money directly into something for you family. Have you ever though of opening a shop of some kind. I am taking a marketing class right now, and for sure owning your own bizz is the way to go, But buying in on some new stock pays off very well. I know a guy who knows a guy that owns almost all the stock a bagged salad. He's set for a while. . . I say a get rich skeem would be investing in property, most of the time they pay whatever you ask for so $$$.

[Breukelen advocaat]

I didn't realize that VaporDaddy was in Canada - and I guess they have a different system for collecting unemployment.


However, a year's severance pay for somebody that worked ten years is very good, by U.S. standards. The average severance rate here is one to two weeks for every year worked. In this case he's getting 5.2 weeks for each year he worked.

It all boils down to finding another job or source of income.

Good luck, whatever you do.

[Delta9 UK]

Take up graphic/web design - learn a new skill :) Setup your own business.

Set your own hours, work from home & watch your kids grow up.

I.T for the win!

[VaporDaddy]

Well today's the day I get the papers. I have until the end of the month to sign. Thank you all for the advice and keep it coming. You are all so helpfull. What a great community to be a part of! :)

[Demeter]

VaporDaddy- You know it is a crime to continue to work at a job that doesn't feed your soul. You could die next week- what would your tombstone say- he paid the bills? I'm not saying don't be practical, especially with kids to support, but you shouldn't give away so much of your life to something that doesn't make you happy. I was a department head at the college for 5 years, and I finally said enough because I was so bored, and I went back to teaching full-time. I could have stayed in that job and made more money, but I felt like my life was passing me by. It was a risk to make a change, but that's the fun part of life!
My husband went to culinary school and worked as a chef for a few years with his own catering company- that is how we met, I worked for him! He ended up being an apprentice for a master ice sculptor, and now he has his own ice-sculpting business which he loves and it pays well. So I say go for it- or as Joseph Campbell said, "follow your bliss!"

[VaporDaddy]

Damn, I didn't get the papers. Now I have to wait till Monday.
I need to get high and chill the fuck out.:jointsmile:

[VaporDaddy]

VaporDaddy- You know it is a crime to continue to work at a job that doesn't feed your soul. You could die next week- what would your tombstone say- he paid the bills? I'm not saying don't be practical, especially with kids to support, but you shouldn't give away so much of your life to something that doesn't make you happy. I was a department head at the college for 5 years, and I finally said enough because I was so bored, and I went back to teaching full-time. I could have stayed in that job and made more money, but I felt like my life was passing me by. It was a risk to make a change, but that's the fun part of life!
My husband went to culinary school and worked as a chef for a few years with his own catering company- that is how we met, I worked for him! He ended up being an apprentice for a master ice sculptor, and now he has his own ice-sculpting business which he loves and it pays well. So I say go for it- or as Joseph Campbell said, "follow your bliss!"


Thank you for those wise words. I really need to hear that I am doing the right thing here. :jointsmile:

[Dest]

if you could start doing your own thing (personal chef as mentioned) you would probably love it, nothing is more satisfying than your own buisness.