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View Full Version : Tips from the wise...Don't say these things to a cop



geonagual
02-25-2007, 03:42 AM
NEVER SAY TO A COP
1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas )
2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
3.Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
5. Are You Andy or Barney?
6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
8. I pay your salary!
9. Gee, Office r! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other
cars around.. That's how far ahead of me they are.
12. When the Officer says "Gee Your eyes look red, have you been smoking marijuana:rasta: ?" You probably shouldn't respond with,"Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"

Skink
02-25-2007, 05:06 AM
13. Why don't you go fu#$@k yourself...

smokeblunts3
02-25-2007, 05:59 AM
I like #12 the most :thumbsup:

When ever i'm near dunkin doughnuts(which is often) there is almost always a cop there.:wtf:

I Stay High
02-25-2007, 06:07 AM
#12 is deff the best

Tokudai
02-25-2007, 07:17 AM
#14 - Why was I going so fast? Well I had the accelerator pushed all the way to the floor. It opens up the throttle plate, and lets more fuel and air in, thus raising rpm and consequently velocity..... See this? (point to steering wheel) This makes it turn....

weedmaster
02-25-2007, 07:20 AM
15: is that your nose or are you chewing a banana.

The Figment
02-25-2007, 08:26 AM
Never,I repeat Never ask a cop,AND I QUOTE-"Do you have to wear your gun to get a hardon to have sex with your wife??"

I was standing in downtown Austin when after being arrested,my GF asked the cop this...needless to say things went downhill Very fast after that!!

DudemeisteR420
02-25-2007, 08:57 PM
^^i bet he was gay(the cop)

BabyFacedAbortion
02-25-2007, 09:06 PM
ahahahaha

ATrain
02-25-2007, 09:17 PM
Not bad at all, especially number 12 :thumbsup:

NextLineIsMine
02-25-2007, 11:22 PM
heres #15: "What appears to be the officer, problem?

AlwaysBlazed
02-25-2007, 11:34 PM
You can try offering them a hit like I do to my mom, that doesn't make her happy though :jointsmile: