Are you dominant in the bedroom?

[Dro_Princess]

I have noticed that in our sexual relationship my husband is the dominate one about 70% of the time. He likes to be in control. The other 30% of the time I man handle him. I was wondering whats the ratio for you ladies here. Are you more submissive, dominate, or is it 50/50.

[stinkyattic]

I am pretty dominant in all other aspects of my life.
I'm used to being the boss at work and the breadwinner at home.
When I go to bed, I'm officially off the clock.
Time for my man to be in charge, lol.

[Mrs. Greenjeans]

I am pretty dominant in all other aspects of my life.
I'm used to being the boss at work and the breadwinner at home.
When I go to bed, I'm officially off the clock.
Time for my man to be in charge, lol.
Right on. I am the same way. I have enough things to do without having to be naked and macho at the same time.
However, we switch it up sometimes. I have a killer corset, so I'll hike my boobs up to my chin, break out the flogger and blindfold, tie him to the spreader bars I made (thank you Wal-Mart), and work him over good. I make him straighten the seams on my fishnets, kiss my 8 inch patent leather heels, worship at the holiest of holies, and tease the snot out of him before I let him finish.

Ah, good times.:thumbsup:

[Chronic Chrissy]

hhmm
neither really, lately we've had sex but the same old sex, he's on top but he's not nessesarily dominant. Then what I try to take the reins he cacks out on me. Like last night I brought a drink to bed and had left over ice, but that didn't exactly work out. Then other nights I get dressed up for when he comes home and have this great "lay down so I can fuck you" plan and it always falls through and I end up back in clothes instead of naked. I also like to be ravaged and have him have his way but.. never mind this is turning into a rant.

Long story short we both want to spice it up but when it comes down to it the other is on a different page.

That's it! I want kinky sex and I'm getting it tonight even if I have to tie him down and gag him!

[birdgirl73]

If we had to break it down into percentages, I'd probably go with exactly the same one you chose for you and your husband, Dro Princess, him 70% and me 30%. Maybe 60%/40% occasionally. By dominant do you mean taking the lead, initiating sex, being the one in control, controlling the activity? Because if you mean actual domination/submissive master-slave role-playing, then we haven't ever really done that. For some reason, that doesn't have much appeal for me, and it even makes me a little uneasy.

My husband loves it when I take the lead and call the shots of what we'll do. He seems to respond especially well to that--and to the surprise factor like if, say, I sneak up on him in the shower or the kitchen or if he's working on something in his office or watching TV in the den. When we're in our bedroom, he still seems to initiate sex more frequently than I do, and I think that's just part of our pattern. He's a guy. He wants and needs it more frequently. At the risk of sounding like a less-than-liberated woman, I have always felt it important to accommodate him as much as possible in that area. The old-fashioned wife inside me sorta believes I'm a.) supposed to, and b.) more likely to hang onto him and successfully sustain the marriage by doing so. (Those last two sentences were hard for me to write. My fear is that someone younger and more equality role-advanced is going to make fun of me for admitting that.)
My being able to take a 30 - 40% share in calling the sex shots is something I've grown into over the years. I didn't really have a notion that there was any other way than submission when we were first married. I was a clueless kid then, however, and that was also so long ago that it was still a different time for couples anyway. Good question!

[Mrs. Greenjeans]

That's it! I want kinky sex and I'm getting it tonight even if I have to tie him down and gag him!
w0ot!:thumbsup:

[BabyFacedAbortion]

I just got my man into some kinky sex. I straight up told him "You need to get kinkier...call me a bitch and a dirty little whore and choke me" and that's exactly what he did LOL. he hates handcuffs tho (reminds him of the times he got arrested) so I can't tie him up but he wants to tie me up :D

i love being a sub with men but with females i'm a dom. I used to tie up my bitch in dressing rooms of like JC Penny and fuck her lol, they love it.

[Mrs. Greenjeans]

Ohhhh chokefucking rocks!!!
It's hard to get a guy to do this though, if he's really in love with you. I had to get my man drunk first.

[BabyFacedAbortion]

Hehe mine is pretty young and inexperienced so when I say to do something he just listens 'cause he doesn't know any better. (he's 2 years younger then me..15) lol.

[Mrs. Greenjeans]

That's right girl! Get 'em young, train 'em right, ruin 'em for the next chick.
When I was 23 I had an 18 year old boyfriend. I did some majorly kinky things to that kid. He was a little bitch for me. 12 years later I ran across his e-mail address on a website. I wrote to him, just to say hi. After a couple of e-mails, I asked him why he never got married. (he's in his 30s now). He said he hadn't been able to find another woman who would do the things to him that I used to do. He still had the dog collar I used to make him wear! LOLOLOL! Poor kid.

[BabyFacedAbortion]

ahahhaha I LOVE it!!

[JaggedEdge]

I'm the dominate one about 97% of the time. I love being in control in bed and my g/f prefers being submissive. It works out great for us.

[JaggedEdge]

God damnit... I didn't realize this was in womens issues... This board needs to not show up in the fucking new posts section. I was wondering why all the women on this site were talking about their bitches lol.

[Dro_Princess]

If we had to break it down into percentages, I'd probably go with exactly the same one you chose for you and your husband, Dro Princess, him 70% and me 30%. Maybe 60%/40% occasionally. By dominant do you mean taking the lead, initiating sex, being the one in control, controlling the activity? Because if you mean actual domination/submissive master-slave role-playing, then we haven't ever really done that. For some reason, that doesn't have much appeal for me, and it even makes me a little uneasy.


Yes Im talking about more of being in control. My husband isnt really into whips and chains he hates being tied up. He kinda freaked out when I handcuffed him and blindfolded him one night. It was so funny.

[birdgirl73]

I was hoping that was what it meant. I've actually used the tie-up approach with scarves before on my husband, and he loved that since it was part of the I'm-in-charge seduction, which he likes to watch play out. That was with our last bed where wrist attachment was more possible on the headboard. On the one we have now, the posts are too far apart for comfortable tying. I could only do that on our current bed if I wanted to stretch his arms uncomfortably far apart. Which I don't. (Not very frequently, at least!)

[Pipe Dreams]

Well, as a guy Im dominant most of the time, but I know a couple girls who take charge in the bed, and to me, thats a HUGE turnon. So is biting.


So there ya go.

EDIT: Bloddy womens issues...

[Mrs. Greenjeans]

I was hoping that was what it meant. I've actually used the tie-up approach with scarves before on my husband, and he loved that since it was part of the I'm-in-charge seduction, which he likes to watch play out. That was with our last bed where wrist attachment was more possible on the headboard. On the one we have now, the posts are too far apart for comfortable tying. I could only do that on our current bed if I wanted to stretch his arms uncomfortably far apart. Which I don't. (Not very frequently, at least!)
Use longer ties. Pantyhose are nice.

[birdgirl73]

Good idea, Mrs. G! I'll keep that in mind. I have a bag of worn out pantyhose that I've cut the legs out of. I normally use them to tie my staked tomato plants in the summertime. But I'll just set a couple of pairs aside for Dave . . . . he'd be very into that if I resurrected that game. He certainly was last time. You always have the best suggestions, Mrs. G., especially when it comes to kink of various types.

[Mrs. Greenjeans]

LOLOLOL! Thank you...I think.:wtf:

[WordUpMuffin]

ohhh I like this thread! :D I would say it's 50/50 for me, sometimes I'm more dominate/sumbissive. I remember the first boy I broke in haha I must have been 13 (we didn't have sex but it was very sexual ;) ) We bit each other hard, I drew blood with my nails from his back, we would cut each other together as well (something I don't do anymore or atleast havent been offered in years haha). He would choke me after i told him too and we would both smack each other around pretty hard haha. Funny thing is he moved away and moved back to where I live now not too long ago and I have been fooling around with him lately hahah.

[Mrs. Greenjeans]

"Reunited and it hurts so good, reunited and we drew some blood, there's one perfect hit, and sugar this one is it, we both are so excited cause we're naked fighting, yeah yeah...."

[iPot]

Hey! All that is in here with me, is just me and ma Snow White. Who da ya think is the one smoking their ass?

[420marijuana420]

"You need to get kinkier...call me a bitch and a dirty little whore and choke me"

I wouldn't have him actually choke you. It could hurt or kill you and it could be some serious legal problems for him. My friend's dad told him about one of his friends who did that and he got manslaughter or something like that and got locked up for a few years because they took it too far.

[JaggedEdge]

I wouldn't have him actually choke you. It could hurt or kill you and it could be some serious legal problems for him. My friend's dad told him about one of his friends who did that and he got manslaughter or something like that and got locked up for a few years because they took it too far.

I have heard of a few occasions where people got carried away with chocking too. The cause of death was due to crushing of the wind pipe I believe. I have never seen articles about it personally, and have only heard that from other people. So it isn't a very acurate source...

[birdgirl73]

Erotic asphyxiation, it's called, and it's something that men typically enjoy trying more than women. Emergency room doctors and nurses can tell good stories about people who get into trouble with this (and with other sexual practices, too).

[VaporDaddy]

OMG I love you all! Just Knowing you wonderful, crazy girls are out there makes me feel better. WOW, I love you all.:thumbsup:

[dutch.lover]

im sad I just stumbled upon this thread now! haha

it's about 50/50 for me and my bf, but like Chrissy was saying I wish things got kinkier! I would love to be thrown up against the wall and have my clothes ripped off, or for him to pin me down somewhere...I guess I have to find a way to get that point across a little clearer...

I also like being dominant sometimes, but I don't know quite how far I can take things with him...

[Trainer07]

i like licking my women out when shes asleep