human nature

[kr1Nx01]

let's face it, most of us judge people on appearance before all else, no matter how much we like to think we don't. ever since i've found this forum, however, i've noticed how horrible this trait is.
i won't name any specific names or anything (i don't want to single people out) but there are many people on this board that have surprised me... altered my perception of the typical images i had in mind.
for example, if i were to see a typical-looking "goth" on the street, i would probably try to avoid them (as they frighten me a bit :o ). yet a certain "goth-looking" person on this board, i have noticed, is far from frightening. in fact, he seems like a great person! if i were to see his face before seeing his posts, i'm afraid i probably wouldn't have thought the same and judged him on appearance only, and i'd be dead wrong.
another example is a certain "patriot-looking" southerner. i would certainly judge him as someone who probably owns a chopper and thinks about nothing but guns and old style. yet i've seen that this isn't the case at all, he seems like a sincerely helpful person with his own set of beliefs, but is still open minded and LISTENS, trys to understand a differant viewpoint... and the fact that he smokes weed blew me away, i never would've guessed. of course again, if i saw him on the street before i read his posts, i'd probably put a label on him and think that he's too opinionated to accept change or whatever stereotype there is... again, i'd be dead wrong!

the point is that i think it's all too easy to look at a person with a glance and judge their whole life on that single image. what if we all behaved in the same way we do on forums in life??? have discussions and give everyone a chance to share their side of the story, a chance to be open and real, to show what's behind the face, the clothes, whatever. is it even possible?
all i know is thanks to you guys, my "presets" have been shattered and now i'm beginning to see people as people, not as thug, goth, punk, prep, or whatever other meaningless clique lables you can think of.

[DrGonzo]

bravo to you, kr1nx01! I would call this the first step to a better world.

of course, humans are hard-wired to base things on assumptions...did you know that people will spontaneously forget who they are talking to in certain situations? imagine this: you are walking down the street, when some random stranger stops and asks you for directions. You start to reply, but some guys carrying a big piece of drywall walk between you and the stranger. About 85% of the time, if the stranger were to switch places with somebody else while you couldn't see them, you wouldn't even notice. thats just how the human brain works, unfortunately.


but the fact that you can think beyond the immediate labels you give people is a tiny glimmer of hope in this war-torn world, I think. remember kids: do unto others as you would do unto yourself!

[GHoSToKeR]

same here.. When I was in school, it was hard not to judge someone by their appearance or by who their friends were.. I used to try not to, and hang out with all sorts of people, but I admit, it was hard

I think i've matured alot over the last 6 months or so. You guys may not believe me by looking at some of my posts (lol) but that's just because I like to have a laugh and hate being serious all of the damn time.. Anyway, with this new-found maturity, i've developed an almost hippi-ish view of the world.. If I had my way i'd be living on a nudist commune in Sweden, hugging trees and eating berries (lol).. I find myself to be alot more accepting of people, but I also find myself to judge people slightly more too.. not by their appearance or personailty, but because of the way they treat people, purposely ruin and pollute the Earth, and their seemingly narrow-minded, self-centered, reckless behaviour.. So no, I dont judge people by their appearance anymore, but it's still hard not to judge people at all

[kr1Nx01]

that's EXACTLY the point i was trying to get across, ghost :D... i'm not saying i don't judge people at all, i'm saying that i now try to look beyond appearance and judge people for who they really are. a person who looks like a freak could be a classy person.... on the other hand, a person who looks nice could be a real prick.
imagine how many potentially wonderful relationships people deny themselves because of stereotyping.

i dunno, it's not like i ever had many prejudices to begin with... maybe after 6 months of being finished with high school, its shite mentality has finally dissappeared from me ("oh you have a $600 purse and you wear a birth control patch on your revealed flat tummy... you're so fucking COOL!" or "omg you're smoking a CIGARETTE in the BATHROOM STALL?! WHAT A STUPID FOOLISH REBEL YOU ARE!" or "oh man that kid is in fashion class? what a homosexual homo" shit like that.). i'm glad it's past... i never liked that crap to begin with

[kiwi]

:D What a great thread...I too have to say that I agree all of the above. :D
I'v had the chance to get to know some amasing ppl on this site, but in saying that if I was to walk past this person in the street I wouldn't give them a second glance truth be knowen. I'm not saying that I am a snob or anything like that but I think we are all this way enclined.

This site has given me a chance to know a massive, worldwide, network off people from all different countrys and walks of life. :p I feel that even tho all these ppl aren't a visual concept, they are as real as I am. :D

[RESiNATE]

Yeah, cool words, Kr1.

I always do try to meet people on an even level, but you're right, sometimes I am guilty of prejudging. But, the things is, in my job I have to deal with all manner of folk - so I have learned to be courteous and polite, to whom ever I speak to. It pays dividends in the long-run, and I often find myself surprised at the hidden intelligence that lurks behind a stereotypical face.
As DrGonzo said, treat people in the way you'd like to be treated by them.
It costs nothing, but is worth a great deal.

Lovely :)

[maryjanemama]

I think it's cool that we get to know each other here without all the physical bs that might have gotten in the way if we'd all met face to face. Then, if a person does post their pic, it's more like, "Oh, cool, that's what so-and-so looks like!" and not, "Wow, so-and-so is (insert adjective here)." Does that make any sense? It's like you really get to know the person before you see the person...which I think is great.

[GHoSToKeR]

You're right MJM.. the only problem is, you might get to know someone without metting them, and they could just be bullshitting you the whole time.. but I guess that type of shit probably only happens in chat rooms or whatever

nice signature by the way lol :p

[maryjanemama]

You're right MJM.. the only problem is, you might get to know someone without metting them, and they could just be bullshitting you the whole time.. but I guess that type of shit probably only happens in chat rooms or whatever

nice signature by the way lol :p
You're very right, Ghost, sometimes I tend to think that ppl are as honest as I am and I end up getting lied to. But, I think, as time goes on and ppl become members of the boards for a while, their real selves emerge. Hopefully, anyway... Actually, I think I reveal too much, that's just my nature. I could never have multiple screen names and all of that nonsense because I could never keep all the lies straight. lol I'm an outspoken Sagittarian, my horoscope always says, "Today you must bite your tongue and not weild your brutal honesty." or something of that nature. Oh well. :)

Btw, that sig is the story of my life! :D

[GHoSToKeR]

That's funny, because my horoscope keeps saying "Remember to wear your pants when you leave the house this time"..

Obviously, I ignore it..

Now that I think about it, maybe that's why I keep getting arrested for Indecent Exposure???