I'm so fucked up right now.....

[potsmokingnome]

My wife told me today that she is not happy with our marriage...it came as absoulute utter shock. yeah we fight but I didn't know she was this unhappy. We almost even took a break because of all of it..

I'm in such a fucked up space right now I don't know what to do. I love my wife with all my heart, and it hurts so much to know she's unhappy due to our marriage....she's at work now, and I'm sitting home all alone, and I can't stop crying. I have nobody to talk too...I'm such a mess. God damnit...I don't know what to do...

I love her so much, and she say she still loves me too, she just not happy...that hurt so much to hear her say that..I don't know....I want the fighting to stop, and for our marriage to be better, I just don't know what to do anymore.... I'm sorry for posting this I'm just in so much pain.....

[Nochowderforyou]

Why are you fighting? Answer that, solve why, and work on not falling into that situation again. Talk to her and ask why she is unhappy. Try to fix things with her and don't become another "50% of all marriages end in divorce" statistic.

Consider marriage consuling (sp?).

Talk to your wife, as none of us know what's really bothering her. Only she knows, so ask her and talk with her. If you love her, try and work it out.

Good luck. :)

[potsmokingnome]

yeah when she gets home we are going to have a long talk...I just don't wanna loose my wife, and I want her to be happy again.

and yeah we are considering counselling...just so broke, hope we can find some free counselling....

thanx chowder your allways helpful, and friendly.

[Nochowderforyou]

Yes, talking is good. Find what is bothering her and try and fix it, and maybe tell her if anything is bothering you, so she can work on that as well. Marriage has to come from both sides, not just the one.

I'm glad I could be of some help. I hope it works out the best for you. :)

[bong_man]

dude figure out what is upsetting her and try fix it and treat her the way someone you love deserves to be treated (not saying u dont just to high to attempt to find the delete key!)

[friendowl]

nothing last forever
if you are doing everything in your power
to make her happy and she still is not
then maybe its time to look at things with your head
instead of your heart.
when two peopl elike/love each other it is suppoes to be
a nice thing. if one of the two isnt happy then it aint going to work

it may work for a while longer but in the long run
things are just going to get worse.

there is no easy way thru this
just be real about the situation

[potsmokingnome]

I have to figure this out, I know there is stuff I need to do to fix it, a major one is I get so damn defensive all the time, I don't even realize it most of the time till its to late.

and when we fight we say horrible stuff to each other, I know that has to stop as well. I just want my wife to be happy. I love her so damn much...thanks for listening (reading). I want to fix this, I want my marriage to be better then what it has become. I just hope I don't loose her, cause if I can't make her happy...I want her to be happy atall cost, even if that means a seperation...I reallly really hope it doesn't come to that, I love my wife, and she loves me, and I hope we can work this out....

[Its a Plant]

Sometimes love isn't enough...

If you tell her what you're telling us, then all you can do is see what comes of it and pray that things all get worked out.

Good luck man. ~

[MaryjaneAndHashley]

yeah when she gets home we are going to have a long talk...I just don't wanna loose my wife, and I want her to be happy again.

and yeah we are considering counselling...just so broke, hope we can find some free counselling....

thanx chowder your allways helpful, and friendly.

Its true, talking can solve a lot. I somehow feel like if she read ur posts she would change her mind :p , u seem to love her soo much.

Anyways, I sincerely hope it goes well, good luck.

[potsmokingnome]

thanks for everyone's input...I've finally stopped crying, and my head hurts like a bitch...thinking about smoking a joint, but I dunno if that would be a good idea..

[MaryjaneAndHashley]

thanks for everyone's input...I've finally stopped crying, and my head hurts like a bitch...thinking about smoking a joint, but I dunno if that would be a good idea..

Go for it, recently happened to me and 3-4 one-hitter hits did the trick. My headache was gone in no time.

[potsmokingnome]

Go for it, recently happened to me and 3-4 one-hitter hits did the trick. My headache was gone in no time.

I think I will I'm going to have a shower first, then roll one and go for a walk, since I can no longer toke up in the house...and think long and hard...

[EbelEyes]

Calmly discuss about things, don't fight!

And no more nasty words!

Those hurtful words need to go because even if you didn't mean it, and the other person knows that too, it doesn't change the fact that it still hurts.

Always remember if tempers start to rise...

...that she is your everything.

[potsmokingnome]

Calmly discuss about things, don't fight!

And no more nasty words!

Those hurtful words need to go because even if you didn't mean it, and the other person knows that too, it doesn't change the fact that it still hurts.

Always remember if tempers start to rise...

...that she is your everything.

yeah very true about the nasty words, they will stop! thanx for the advice...thanks everyone, now that I'm showered, I'm going to take the dog for a walk and smoke a pinner to relax a bit and think all this through....I want a happy marriage again.....thanx again everyone that posted...

[dankus maximus]

man, thats shitty times, i know what its like to be in a one sided realtionship, but a marraioge must be a whole new world.


kind of as a side note, lots of people on this sight getting depressed recently.:(

[AR15]

Yeah, like people said, just try and talk with her. Be respectful and open minded when you have your talk. That way if you get to things you fight over, you can restrain yourself enough to keep talking and not have it escalate to a fight. You might surprise her like that. I don't know, but I'd say letting her know you want to fix this and that you don't take her for granted would be the first step in the right direction.

I hope this works out for you. Keep your head up.

[Bob the Awesome]

Yea, everyone's got the right idea. Keep things calm, find out what bothers her, what changes will make her happy, and work towards them.

[napolitana869]

I dont know what to tell you that hasnt already been said. good luck.

[crudemood]

Communication is really important, not alot of people do that anymore.
Do talk to her, for your sake and hers, if you both love each other you're willing to do what it takes to be with each other.
Otherwise, well you know..

Good luck.

[meatman]

Hi Bro I know you hurt right now.But the best thing to do is tell her to fuck-off.It will hurt.But you will never be able to trust her.I have gone thru this a couple of times.Be a man! Later Bro meatman

[2600HERTZ]

I read this just now man....I am a really empathetic person....I really felt like I was feeling the same pain. I am really sorry for your situation!

[Skink]

Sorry I got to ask,,,why is she working and your at home???

the BIGGEST problem today is people make a lifelong commitment without really knowing each other... Just saying I'm not happy is not going to cut it so she needs some comunication skills... You can't even begin to blame yourself until she spills... You can become a better person and that benefits all around you and that is grand but,,,that may not even be what's eating at her... Most of the time when there is a communication problem the people are afraid to talk and often sidestep the truth because they are afraid to say it... if you are loud she may verywell be intimidated and that is the death card because it will take a whole lot of time to reverse a mess like that,,,just like a scared dog they don't unscare easy... I go in this direction because you say you yell a lot...

Does she have a close friend??? You may want to talk to that friend... My wife did not say much ,,,I came home from work one night and there was a 3 page letter chicken and homemade corn fritters and no her,,,she never to this day was able to communicate her true feelings face to face,,,things might of been different if she could or did...

all this leads to one important thing don't beat around the bush,,,Find the truth!!!

[potsmokingnome]

Thanx again for all the advice!

but I must apoligize for unloading in here the way I did...I proably shouldn't have posted at all. but thanks for responding none the less..