thumbs up to whoever

[slipknotpsycho]

whoever decided this would be a good idea for a forum, deserves a thumbs up... even if we ignore the fact of trying to become more mainstream and 'non smoker friendly' (as far as the site goes) this is an excellent idea for a new sub-forum... just would like to say awsome idea.. mostly everyone on this site either is a parent, or will become one some day, and it's never to early to start practicing or researching.... hell, mostly everything i know about parenting, is things i've learned more than 3 years ago (which was before i even knew my wife was pregnant with our first son, don't have another child yet, just saying mostly everything i know, i picked up before i even had to consider what i'd do as a father) i hope everyone comes here, not just parents, future parents, or people who hope to be parents one day.... everyone can do with a little child-education..

[birdgirl73]

Thanks and credit for this idea go to Liberiamom, who, with luck, will soon be a parent herself and who is already a great teacher and a friend and role model to lots of people here. Happy new year, Liberiamom! Thanks for a great forum idea.

[slipknotpsycho]

liberiamom, thanks for the new forum! i'm sure far less will use it than actually should... but that doesn't mean you should feel any less credited for a great idea!

[liberiamom]

I think I just articulated a desire many already had :)
I really hope that teenagers (who sometimes can't understand their parents!) as well as parents trying to raise kids will visit here, if only to read what the adults are experiencing, so that they have some idea of parenting issues.It has always amazed me, as a teacher, that there is no "training" for the most important and difficult job- being a parent!
This forum could be a place where we share our concerns and experiences - including, but not exclusive to the use of pot- we are not what we smoke, though our choice puts us in greater peril- so that we all can benefit as a community.
Happy New Year to all of you that I have met, albeit briefly, through your posts on this site- I hope to learn much from all of you in the coming year!

[birdgirl73]

Happy new year and good morning, Liberiamom! I think it's a marvelous idea. Almost like a cannabis-friendly parenting support group. I could have used such a support network when I was the mother of a little one.

Any ETA on when you'll be adopting your baby(ies)? Just curious. My younger sister is working on getting pregnant now through IVF, and if she does, I can't wait to be an aunt. Hers would be the first baby in the family in 20 years, which was how long ago mine was born.

[liberiamom]

Happy new year and good morning, Liberiamom! I think it's a marvelous idea. Almost like a cannabis-friendly parenting support group. I could have used such a support network when I was the mother of a little one.

Any ETA on when you'll be adopting your baby(ies)? Just curious. My younger sister is working on getting pregnant now through IVF, and if she does, I can't wait to be an aunt. Hers would be the first baby in the family in 20 years, which was how long ago mine was born.

Hi birdgirl- Good luck to your sister- it is a difficult process as she can tell you. We had to do inseminations because my eggs weren't strong enough - but we still got pregnant though we lost it. Bu tmany people do have success and I hope she's one of them.

We have completed our home study and go in for fingerprinting on Wed for the final US govt approval, which should happen within a month. The orphange is still getting accreditated, so if that happens soon, we could be travelling in March (during Spring Break).

We are actually leaning toward adopting a couple of girls that look to be about 8 years old in the pictures. There are lots of younger children that are adorable, though no babies in this orphanage, but we think that the little ones will have no problem getting adopted, since more couples want little ones, while the older ones might not be chosen as readily. The other consideration is my age- I just turned - gasp- 50 - keep this a secret, okay? and my husband doesn't really want to change diapers. We have been trying to get kids, in one way or another, for nearly ten years, so words cannot express how eager I am for the day we bring them home, whoever they might be!
Of course, if I won the lottery, we'd bring all 54 kids home :)

It's going to be quite an interesting chapter and I look forward to the ride-
You mentioned you had a little one- how old is your child now? I will be asking you for advice along the way, I am sure!

[birdgirl73]

How thrilling to be thinking of adopting two girls! I think that's a great idea to bring home older ones. You're exactly right that the younger ones will be the ones most people think of adopting. That's nice that you're giving consideration to the ones who're less likely to find homes. I'm sure you've said this before, but I think I missed it. Are y'all adopting the girls from China? We have some friends who did that and their girls are just darling. They got one, a toddler, about five years ago and then went back two years later and adopted another. Sweet, smart girls. This friend and her husband have them enrolled in a sort of Chinese enrichment school on Saturday mornings so they can stay in touch with their native culture and learn its language. They're also planning trips back to China as a family. I think that's so nice.

Yeah, the IVF process has already been an adventure for my sister. They told her she'd have a much higher chance of getting pregnant successfully with a donor egg, and so she's going to do that instead of working with her own. She's almost 44 (I'm 45). They had a donor all picked out and were ready to start, but in the initial medical testing the donor tested positive for several illicit substances and so was kicked out of the program. So they're starting over with a new one. I hope it works for them. It's so expensive. They're going to try adoption if the IVF attempts fail. They're paying for some "package" where they can get up to four attempts. If that doesn't work, they'll adopt, she says.

We tried and tried to have more than one baby but I miscarried five times after ours was born. He was enormous (10 lbs 7 oz) and I had to have an emergency c-section with him. They theorized that the scarring from that surgery probably kept further pregnancies from proceeding successfully. Our son is 20 and halfway through his third year of college at Duke. Fortunately, he's a sensible and good kid. The most challenging times for me were when we was 2 and 3 and was into everything. And the mouthy phase from 14 to 16. He's pretty mature, which is faily common for an only child, and was usually easy to reason with. Right now, my worries center on the fact that college kids at that age do so much drinking and so much random hooking up. I live in fear that he'll get one of his young lady friends pregnant or that he or one of his friends will do something insane in a car after too much partying. I worked as a paramedic in a university town when I was younger, and I've seen what results when college kids combine partying and automobiles.

Nice talking with you!

[liberiamom]

It sounds like you went through a difficult time too! I am convinced all these infertility issues are becoming more prevalent because of our environment.
My sister came and stayed with us for a month when we were still doing the infertility treatments and she went on the stim drugs in order to give us a doner, but her eggs were starting to decline too, so that didn't work. It is so difficult to try so hard for so long and still not succeed!

After a year of resting, we had started the process to adopt a baby from China, but then my husband got testicular cancer and even though he has had surgery and been given a clean bill of health 6 months later, the Chinese gov't has a brand new rule that states prospective parents must be 5 years clean from cancer, so we were disqualified. We had to start all over, and decided upon Liberia, on the grain coast of Africa. We met some people who had just opened an orphanage there, so the pieces have just been fitting together so far. I am keeping my fingers crossed for this to work out!

So nice chatting with you! Take care-

[mc-blaze21]

ive recently become a father myself and at 23 it was proper scary loads of things go through ur mind and its nice to have some where other than my missus to come and talk thank you to who ever made this forum nuff respect

[RedLocks]

aye thumbs up on the forum idea, just saw it today.

and GL to ya liberiamom, good things ya doing and I hope it works out well for ya

[Ibu Jari]

Great forum idea! I run a parenting site myself.

I'm a 24 yr old stay a home mom of two, ages 5 and 1.

[liberiamom]

Thanks to all for sharing your wisdom on this forum!

It is inspiring to hear from parents who feel such deep love for their children, and who are determined to help their children grow in character- it gives me a lot of hope for the next generation, and boy will they need it! We're all going to have to become stronger, I believe, so I am glad to have a group to share my questions and discoveries with.

I have worries about the racism my kids might face - we will be a bi-racial familty, so there may come a time when someone says something really ignorant- any advice? My idea is to just tell the children that some people are ignorant, but that nice people know that everybody is the same no matter what color they are, and we should just be with nice people. I know that sounds simplistic, but my girls won't speak English very well at first, so I'll need to keep it clear. Maybe I'm worried over nothing. I don't think we will have any trouble where we live, it's nice and diverse, but it's good to think about this sort of thing in advance, so that I don't get mad and yell in front of the kids.

[Ibu Jari]

My only advice re: racism is to teach them to cherish their heritage, and should they ever face racism, whether it be someone ignorant about the words they are using, or a true racist, teach them how to educate those who are ignornant, and either stand up for themselves, educate, or ignore the racists.

And of course, by standing up for themselves I don't mean fighting, but with the wisdom and knowledge that stamps out racism.

[liberiamom]

My only advice re: racism is to teach them to cherish their heritage, and should they ever face racism, whether it be someone ignorant about the words they are using, or a true racist, teach them how to educate those who are ignornant, and either stand up for themselves, educate, or ignore the racists.

And of course, by standing up for themselves I don't mean fighting, but with the wisdom and knowledge that stamps out racism.

Beautifully said- Thank you!

[likemclever]

GREAT fourm :thumbsup:

[slipknotpsycho]

Thanks to all for sharing your wisdom on this forum!

It is inspiring to hear from parents who feel such deep love for their children, and who are determined to help their children grow in character- it gives me a lot of hope for the next generation, and boy will they need it! We're all going to have to become stronger, I believe, so I am glad to have a group to share my questions and discoveries with.

I have worries about the racism my kids might face - we will be a bi-racial familty, so there may come a time when someone says something really ignorant- any advice? My idea is to just tell the children that some people are ignorant, but that nice people know that everybody is the same no matter what color they are, and we should just be with nice people. I know that sounds simplistic, but my girls won't speak English very well at first, so I'll need to keep it clear. Maybe I'm worried over nothing. I don't think we will have any trouble where we live, it's nice and diverse, but it's good to think about this sort of thing in advance, so that I don't get mad and yell in front of the kids.

no we won't have to become any stronger then we have in the past... we just need to teach everyone to fight for what they believe in and listen to their own minds and hearts, rather then what other people tell them to believe... i mean the past few decades, it's very evident there are some free thinkers, but no where near as many as their should be.. the rest are obviously listening to what 'people in power' are telling them to listen to.. some, i will give credit to, actually believe what they're hearing... but most.. i think it's more out of fear.. and a society that is run by fear... is no society at all.. it's another dictatorship

[liberiamom]

no we won't have to become any stronger then we have in the past... we just need to teach everyone to fight for what they believe in and listen to their own minds and hearts, rather then what other people tell them to believe... i mean the past few decades, it's very evident there are some free thinkers, but no where near as many as their should be.. the rest are obviously listening to what 'people in power' are telling them to listen to.. some, i will give credit to, actually believe what they're hearing... but most.. i think it's more out of fear.. and a society that is run by fear... is no society at all.. it's another dictatorship

You make an excellent point. I think too many people are too easily swayed by logical fallacies. Sometimes students would rather I just tell them what something "means" rather than go to the effort to figure it out! So maybe laziness is part of it too.