Top 10 things a dealer hates to hear.

[Nochowderforyou]

Hey all,

I was reading a magazine this morning and found this humourous. As the title says......

10. "No dude, it's cool! He's just my roomates buddy's brother"

9. "I was gonna call, but I was in the neighborhood and I figured I'd just stop by instead"

8. "I know we're on the phone and everything, but I just wanted to make sure the pot you're selling is really primo"

7. "So-and-so has better stuff for cheaper"

6. "I don't want to rush you, but my buddies are double-parked out front with some tunes blasting"

5. "Is it cool if I pay you next time for this?"

4. "I know you want sixty for this, but can you be a bro and give it to me for fifty?"

3. "Sorry to keep calling, dude. Did anything come through yet?"

2. "Well, my life story begins in Iowa, but I didn't go to college there, which brings me back to what I was saying before-how the planet is really controlled by evil forces, and the government is putting chips in everybody's brain, because I read in the news that blah blah blah." :p

1. "Speak into the microphone."

Feel free to add anymore things that a dealer hates to hear. Hope you enjoy! :smokin:

Peace.

[PaRaNoIa]

11. "Come on to the chat ffs"


(ok, I'm just lonely in the chat room..:o )

[delusionsofNORMALity]

there is, of course, the ultimate #1 that none of us wants to hear;

"you have the right to remain silent, anything you say....."

[Stormhix]

"If I dont like it, can I bring it back?":D

[Skink]

The count was over,here's your 2 grams back???

[buddymyfriend]

''Is it buy one, get one free this week?''

[PaRaNoIa]

The count was over,here's your 2 grams back???

Why would he hate that?:p

[Skink]

Why would he hate that?:p

IDK,,,just sounded different...

[PaRaNoIa]

lol

I would be pretty perplexed, that's all I know..:p

[santa]

"err..... its all in change.. is that okay?"

[MacWQ33]

LOL...that was a funny list, and people have said some good ones...

A dealer does not want to hear....

..."Hey I brought over my new digital scale to try it out"...

or

..."By the way, I got my friend right here in my jacket, and he's pretty loaded...and he hates skimpy bags and dirt weed. Just to let ya know"...

[PaRaNoIa]

"heeey.. Wait a minute... This isn't weed"

[Dr. Dro]

Hahahahahahaha!!

[Nochowderforyou]

"err..... its all in change.. is that okay?"

Ha ha! I like that one. :thumbsup: Dealers HATE change, so I've been told by many of them.

[PaRaNoIa]

Ha ha! I like that one. :thumbsup: Dealers HATE change, so I've been told by many of them.

Who the fuck wants an Oz paid in change? It's a pain in the ass!

[CChrisgat05]

yea they deff do hate change i did it once but i knew the guy since forever and i told him about it before i did it and he agreed to it
also something that buyers hate to hear from dealers.
i'm right around the corner ill be there in 2 mins. 5 hours later he comes round the corner to call u and u go well i already got some since u told me 2 mins. where were u

[cygnustaxt]

..."By the way, I got my friend right here in my jacket, and he's pretty loaded...and he hates skimpy bags and dirt weed. Just to let ya know"...

haha, that one's my favorite. I'll have to try it sometime lol.

[HiProGlow]

Do you accept foodstamps?:)

[qdavid]

..."By the way, I got my friend right here in my jacket, and he's pretty loaded...and he hates skimpy bags and dirt weed. Just to let ya know"...[/QUOTE]

I don't mean to be a downer cause that was hiarious. The reality of that threat even being part of buying a joint or two or even just being exposed to that type bullshit karma, is a big reason why a lot of stoners grow there own. Really funny cause it's so true. Good one Mac.

[qdavid]

Oops, there" an "l" in hilarious. Fucking laced? I wish I could type sometimes.

[Skink]

FREEZE!!!

[CYRAX]

"who do you work for?, snitch him out and your free to go".

Dead either way, i'd rather get locked up then get killed by the person you fucked over.

[PaRaNoIa]

My personal most hated one is when they ask "can I pay you tomorrow"

WTF is that?


*at Burger King*


"Erhm.. Can I get a King Size XXL meal?"

"Sure, that'll be (whatever it costs)

"Ok, I'll pay you tomorrow if that's ok with you..."



I mean, WTF is that? One of my mates once did that to me, and he didn't pay me back until 1½ months later.. Fucking jackass..

[Skink]

My personal most hated one is when they ask "can I pay you tomorrow"

WTF is that?


*at Burger King*


"Erhm.. Can I get a King Size XXL meal?"

"Sure, that'll be (whatever it costs)

"Ok, I'll pay you tomorrow if that's ok with you..."



I mean, WTF is that? One of my mates once did that to me, and he didn't pay me back until 1½ months later.. Fucking jackass..

You can blame that on Wimpy,,,LOLz...

[D.Boone]

my life story begins and will probably end in iowa. i owe alot to iowa pot.

[Left]

Ive been paid in half dollars before. 30 of them. Half of them were bi-centenial half dollars and the other half were silver.

[Perp]

LOL


It's still kinda DAMP.

[As the weed crumbles to dust in his fingers.]

[CChrisgat05]

Ive been paid in half dollars before. 30 of them. Half of them were bi-centenial half dollars and the other half were silver.


they are worth alot more than that sux for that guy

[GetDown]

can i get the first gram free..... to see if i like it?

[chisme]

no. 15

ring ring, ring ring, ring ring, ring ring, ring ring, ring ring........you have been diverted to the 02 voicemail service blah he blah cannot answer your calll at the mo....so on

[orangeman]

The only thing dealers hate to hear here is "Let me get this sack and I got you tommorow" lol.

[EmoRebellion]

How about "Give me your money bitch or ill stab you!"

Thatd prolly be that last thing I wanna hear.

[ValkyrieAg]

One time, I bought some stuff and split the cost with some girl, i brought it over, she paid me, and i got in my car to leave, and she walks up to the window and says "hey, I miscounted my money and I need a 20 back....can we just exchange it back?"

[EmoRebellion]

haha whatd you tell her?

[dopeboy703]

lol if i were u val id say suck my dicc!n id think about it:thumbsup: jkjk

[Magic Haze]

"This stuff is ok, heres *****'s number call him hes got way better"

[partyguy420]

"hey, can i get a decent bowl for a dollar?"

[puffin tuff]

this weed is bunk!

[brotherherb]

Did you weigh this??:smokin:

[Frivolous248]

"I stopped smoking"

[Samwhore]

Ive been paid in half dollars before. 30 of them. Half of them were bi-centenial half dollars and the other half were silver.

haha my best friend once paid $10 all in quarters for a few joints, she comes with a bag full of quarters and i say "what the hell is that" and we both started laughing

[potsmokingnome]

LOL great list and addtions :)

"its ok if I all my firends come in right?"

damn can't think of any good ones lol

[ronjohn420]

okay heres the one that got me.....

rj- whats up man??

jm- nothin much man just chillin

rj- what you need

jm- well i know i owe ya, so heres the 100.00

rj- cool deal man, are you lookin for anything?

jm- yeah man can i get a 1/2 oz.

rj- sure man got cha right here

jm- is it okay if i get that on tab since im paid up????

rj-........(SMACK!!!!)