If you were God?

[JunkYard]

I'm taking applications for the position of God over the next few months. The first one [God] created everything, but he's getting tired, and has found out about Tequila & lime juice, and well, he really likes the bottle nowdays. He's looking for a replacement as you can't very well govern too good when sloshed, right? He's been doing all kinds of crazy stuff lately...

Anyway, I have a few simple questions about your new position. You must answer each to be considered.

Would you demand worship? Would you prefer people go to church and give lip service, or would you rather they enjoy life, and appreciate what was made?

Would you punish? Would you punish in an afterlife, or let a persons actions and natural consequence of those actions suffice? Is sin applicable?

Would you ever destroy the world? There's a lot of evil in the world, but would you destroy it, or would you let mankind work it out themselves?

Would you ever answer prayers? A lot of people pray and ask for things; would you answer or just let things work out on their own in their own time?

Would you enjoy the fragrance of good bud? There are a lot of people smoking these days, and many do it to help the connect spiritually. Would you shun this practice, or appreciate the fact that they're enjoying one of the finest herbs in existance, and using it to connect, for medicinal purposes, and for natural relaxation?

Would you Love all of humanity even w/o a belief in you or Jesus? This is the really BIG question. There are many who don't believe, so do you think it is fair for the unbelievers to live w/o your Love, or would you Love them just the same?


All applications will be viewed by the Big guy if I can get him to put the Tequila down for a few. :cool:


Love,

[slipknotpsycho]

no, i'd be too busy smoking to worry if everyone is in fear of me.

depends on the situation at hand... i can't very well just let everything slide now can i? what kind of a god would i be if all i did was sit up there smoking?

why would i want to destroy the world.. there may be alot of evil, but there's probably even more good in it. can't have the good without the bad.

on serious prayers, yes.. on simple everday "i want <insert thing>" no... if you want it so bad, work for it. on a side note, i'd probably cure everyone of disease that asked for it... no reason to let everyone suffer.. i also wouldn't be granting people in jail/prison the freedom nearly all of them pray for.. if you weren't guilty, or it was something superficial such as getting busted with weed, i'll think about it...

of course i wouldn't have a problem with bud... why would i? any other non-naturally occuring drug tho, would be wiped from existance.

pretty much the same as the first question.

[Nochowderforyou]

1. NO, never.

2. It depends on a persons actions. If they make mistake in life, mistakes are part of human nature and I'd let it go, but if they make the same mistake over and over again, then there is some punishing to be done.

3. Nope. I'd get sheer pleasure watching humans destroy one another, followed by great sadness, as that is what I let them do to the one, and only earth.

4. Depends. If it's about meaningless BS, they'll get through it, but if it is an uncureable illness and one is suffering greatly from it (ex. not being able to afford medications, etc...) then I would help them before the ones complaining that the entire world is against them. Like if someone who never smoked a cigg. in their life got cancer, I'd help them, but if someone chose to smoke ciggs. all those years and get cancer, TS. May sound harsh, but whose fault is it that they have cancer...

5. I'd be the god passing around the bong in the afterlife. :p I'm all for it, enjoy it. I'd let it rain seeds every Spring fo the new growing season.

6. Hmmm, good question. If they were a good person without the belief of me, then I wouldn't care. A person can do whatever they want, as long as they are happy. If someone was unhappy, and they didn't believe, I would try and help in some godly way.

Neat thread, so when do I start? :D

[rainbow_jo]

If I were god, I think I'd carry on how s/he's been doing already.
Whatever you want, I'll want. I won't expect anything from anyone. But whatever you will is, so is mine.

[Inferius]

Timmy was an average boy, who noone understands.... Mom and Dad And vicky, always giving him demands....

[MastaChronic]

no, id be too sloshed to demand much of anything

sin is not applicable, whether they make it into heaven or hell would be based entirely on how big their thumb nail is.......

i might possibly kill off a few hundred million, if just to make some room and clear up that whole overcrowding issue

depends on what the prayer is and how i feel about it

id appreciate the fact, and any prayer asking for bud would be looked at in a more favourable light than other prayers but still may not be answered

no, i wouldnt love humanity even if they did believe in whatever it is i want them to believe in.

[ChronoSponge]

Would you demand worship? Yes. I would demand that people revere their God and show their faith. To not do so would symbolize lack of faith in my eyes, and thus incur my anger. The only people who will be saved in the afterlife are those who fully believe in me and obey my laws.

Would you punish? People who follow and obey my word shall not be punished. But if my word is broken, those who do not beg forgiveness will be punished because it is the just thing to do. The only fitting punishment for non-believers and law breakers is eternal pain and suffering.

Would you ever destroy the world? The world was created to be inhabited by God's creations. Without it, who would worship me unquestiongly?

Would you ever answer prayers? I would answer prayers in a way I saw fit. I would perform them in such a way that no one can tell by sight alone that it was my doing. I would leave it up to the persons beliefs to decide if their prayer was actually answered. And if they prayed again I probably wouldn't grant it.

Would you enjoy the fragrance of good bud? Naturally, even Jesus smoked the herb.

Would you Love all of humanity even w/o a belief in you or Jesus? Those who live without believing in God's son and without God's love choose to do so on their own. It is Jesus's word himself that said "But whoever blasphemes against the Holy Spirit will never be forgiven; he is guilty of an eternal sin." Those who blasphem know their ways, and will not be forgiven.

[bongomania]

If I were God, Carlos Beltran would not have struck out looking in the bottom of the ninth, bases loaded and lose the pennant to the lousy cardinals this year. If I were God the New York Mets would win the World Series once every few years. And the hated yankees would never win!

[JunkYard]

If I were God I would never demand worship, but I would look on those who lived their lives to the fullest, and appreciated creation with the utmost respect and Love. I would pity the others for wasting their lives...

I would never punish in an afterlife, and would allow guilt and shame, and natural consequences to be full punishment for misled lives. Sin is an issue, but only self inflicted punishment would be fair, so contrary to an un-pardonable sin concept, there would be nothing that couldn't be resolved within ones self.

I would never destroy the world, but instead, I'd let mankind fend for themselves and force them to continue living on earth until they fix the BS they created. Although, I would send messengers of Love and peace to help influence a few individuals so they might take steps towards creating a better world.

I might answer a few prayers, but would never interfere with free will. I guess it depends on who, circumstance and kind of prayer...

I naturally Love the smell of burnt offerings of the herbal kind, so yes, good bud would be a treat.

I would Love every last human, and they wouldn't have to believe in anything at all. The murderers and rapist, and violent types would certainly be on my black list, but I'd Love them enough to hope they turned their lives around and happily welcome them into the fullness of my Joy when they did.



Edit: I talked to the big guy and he's liking much of what he's reading so far, but we still have several more apps to be taken before he makes his decision. Oh yeah, he was a little pissed about me talking about his now [non] drinking habits...He says he's just tired and needs a break from governing the universe for a bit. On that note, this position will now be Temporary but if the new God does things right, the big guy might consider following suit.


:smokin:

[Left]

why would you want to be god? It would be so lonely to have all of that knowledge and no one to share it with that is on your level and could understand you.

[sm0k1t]

It's the babies that are their own god modeling the future as they are willing to live. Could be the connection to their ancestors that influences its purpose.

Ill explain if I can when I'm a bit less high that I am now =) and maybe even after I get some sleep!

peace

[Pass That Shit]

JY,

So you're saying that you have a better heart than God?
How will men fix the problems on earth? How do we remove evil? How do we keep ourselves from dying?
It depends on what you view as the problem?

Fuck the world
And it's fortune and fames
cause when we come
we're gonna torch it in flames

new Heaven and new Earth to come......................Stay tuned :thumbsup:

[Pangea]

First, I would have more compasion than condemn 2/3rds of the world to a fiery hell because of they were born in a part of the world where the roman sword(essiential founders of the Christian faith) did not fall.

Second, I would create humans with an pre-enlightened mind... i wish them to understand their purpose...to relish the gift that is conciousness, to realize how the universe has temporarly formed itself into a form by which it can view its own self.

Third, i dunno...for i do not exist...how sad...how cold.

[JunkYard]

JY,

So you're saying that you have a better heart than God?
How will men fix the problems on earth? How do we remove evil? How do we keep ourselves from dying?
It depends on what you view as the problem?

Fuck the world
And it's fortune and fames
cause when we come
we're gonna torch it in flames

new Heaven and new Earth to come......................Stay tuned :thumbsup:


You're really looking forward to death and destruction, aren't you? I guess you would, you seem to think that you will be taken away during the rapture while the rest of us are left here to suffer. Your flower's spoiled, mate...


btw, I think God's heart is perfect. Why do you think I joke like I do, and do you really think God could be replaced, or that I think he could be? All in good fun, bro!


Love,

[Hamlet]

I've got the job? Okay...there are some fundamental problems to fix, but we'll deal with the problems at hand first. Let's go down to accounting and see if the books are cooked.

Would you demand worship? Worship? What's that? I'm the Supreme Being-you think I'm an insecure egomaniac who needs to be stroked to feel comfortable? Have you checked out those crazy fucks doing the worshiping? They'd just as soon kill you as look at ya. This worship crap has got to go. It's some scarry shit.

Would you punish? Would you punish in an afterlife, or let a persons actions and natural consequence of those actions suffice? Is sin applicable?

Punish? For what? Yeah that guy's an axe murderer but were you there when he was dumped in a trash can with an umbilical chord around his neck? Did you see him get raped by a priest when he was seven and beaten every day of his life? The guy before me put Cause and Effect into place. I'm not going to punish a bunch of hairless monkeys for his fuck ups.

And that guy over there doesn't believe in my predecessor? You think I'm going to punish him for using the brain he was given? No, that boy gets a gold star for not being stupid and having the courage to examine the evidence, admit the facts, and, hopeless as it is, try to handle life on his own. He's going to get cremed but at least he's got a set and I admire the hell out of him.

Would you ever destroy the world? There's a lot of evil in the world, but would you destroy it, or would you let mankind work it out themselves?

Can't destroy the World. There's the Rainbow Clause from Genisis and that whole Noah debacle that's still in effect. My predecessor has always been itching to wipe it all out and start over, but we're going to work with what we've got.

Would you ever answer prayers? A lot of people pray and ask for things; would you answer or just let things work out on their own in their own time?

Now that would be something I would have to do. It was pretty chickenshit dumping a soul down here on it's own without even a word of acknowledgement or letting them know 'I've got your back-don't sweat it.' Of course the crazy fuckers down there don't have a clue what they really want or need, so granting wishes would be limited. I'm taking everybody off the 'Ignore list' though. They've at least got that coming.


Would you enjoy the fragrance of good bud? There are a lot of people smoking these days, and many do it to help the connect spiritually. Would you shun this practice, or appreciate the fact that they're enjoying one of the finest herbs in existance, and using it to connect, for medicinal purposes, and for natural relaxation?

Well, I'm God and don't need it, but it was a nice little perk my predecessor got right. God knows *cough* I mean I know they need it after the fucking over they get on a daily basis.

Would you Love all of humanity even w/o a belief in you or Jesus? This is the really BIG question. There are many who don't believe, so do you think it is fair for the unbelievers to live w/o your Love, or would you Love them just the same?

Believe in Jesus? That's a BIG question? Oh, that religious bullshit someone invented to scare people into going to Church. Geez, someone gets a few kudos for saying 'hey, maybe we should all be nice to each other'..and look what they turn it into. Well, you can't blame them considering the hopeless desperation they have to live in daily. But it really took some sadistic, conniving fucks to come up with that 'believe in Jesus or go to hell' bullshit.

Yep, looks like it's going to be one hell of a job straightening out all this mess. The balance started off beautifully, but that didn't last long, did it? The guy before me shouldn't have given those monkeys an advanced brain. Now they want a piece of the action and they're screwing it all up. He thought he was being clever by putting a governor on it to limit its functions, but it looks like that's where he blew it.

That and the 'life feeds on life' thing. Maybe that wouldn't have been such a fuck up if he had never invented 'suffering and fear'. Love was a nice idea the monkeys came up with on their own. To bad it doesn't work when one of the main precedents of existence down there is Survival of the Fittest.

Okay, where to begin, where to begin? Yes, let's start with Hope. But this time we'll make it real instead of just a muse. Assemble the staff for a meeting. Pink slips are going out and heads are going to roll!

[JunkYard]

Woah, big guy...We've only just started with the apps. You'll have to be patient for the real big guy to make his choice, but he certainly likes your app, he says there's a leader there somewhere. He also says hope is a very good place to start.

Hamlet at the moment you are a front runner, but the big guy wants you to consider compassion for your fellow man. This is one of the things he wants fixed down there. Survival of the fitest was the rule for a day or two he says, but now that man is ready for its crown, [some men] he says its time to use it properly, and help those in need. (A care taker attitude) Nochowder has a good grip on what that means after saving that cabbie's life the other day. (Courage, and compassion)


Would either of you two consider leading an army of angels as opposed to the position itself? Not in war, but in helping to change the minds, and attitudes of the religious flock, and politicians. They gotta wake up, and stop waiting for something better, an stop pushing war on those who don't want it. The big guy just told me that he's getting a second wind and has been inspired by the apps, so h might hold on to it for a bit. Even so, he needs more applicants.


Love,

[Hamlet]

What?! Not hired?! I failed the piss test, didn't I....well, fuck him anyway.

[JunkYard]

There are some things that are, and that must be. You're a front runner, Hamlet. He likes your leadership ability, but if you're not willing to take a lower seat, [Leading a legion of angels is quite an honor I might add] than you're not willing to actually do what is best for 'his' creation. If you wish him to scratch your app, he will, but he would very much like to keep you in the mix. Btw, he says fuck you, too, lol! Though, he means it as a term of endearment. I told him your ego 'might' be a little overbearing like mine.

:dance:

He's actually got a sense of humor, which surprized me a little. I always thought him as completely prim and proper, lol!


He's an alright dude once you get to know him.



Love,

[Hamlet]

Leading an army of angels? I would fire those evil bastards first thing. Try reading the Bible and check out what angels are actually doing. Slaughtering babies, destroying cities...ever see them helping anybody? Yeah, that's a crew of thugs we could live without.

[JunkYard]

Angels do what they are told. [For the most part] Leadership is the word of the day, Hamlet. How bout it? :D


Love,

[sm0k1t]

Would you demand worship? Nope, but I would suggest that love is the way to go. Loving all that is part of life makes the world go round and in love there is many paths to take

Would you punish? I think that the time that is givin on earth belongs to what is on earth... who am I to interfere in the material world when it works fine by itself...my realm is the spiritual world and so when the dead comes to me I will measure the vibrations of the soul...

Would you ever destroy the world? Nature can do that without my help so nope I would not interfere...its kind of a cause and effect...screw the nature up and it will screw you to your grave.

Would you ever answer prayers? yes and no. when you want somethin you gota work for it... if its impossible then it aint for you in this life bro. But I might give you a hint on how to do it if you listen very carefully. Watched the film sign with mel gibson..kinda like that.

Would you enjoy the fragrance of good bud? I am the bud...I am the fragrance and I am a vibration of joy.

Would you Love all of humanity even w/o a belief in you or Jesus? I would love all humanity of course since its the way to go. For the unbeliever.. well they will be surprise when they face judgement but they wont be hated or sent to hell or wathever if they loved themselves and other things in life. I did give free will and reason so I am aware of the infinite possibities that might guide one to other beliefs.

:rasta:

[Mosiah]

If I were god in a christian sense, I wouldn't have been so fucking stupid as to give humans an overwhelming sense of curiousity and tell them not to eat certain fruits..

[JunkYard]

Alright, the big guys decision is in. He looked through all of your apps, and took a peak into your personal files, but he ended up going with a young lady in Michigan. This is a temporary replacement, but expect changes soon!!!

Forwarning: There will be a slight hell to pay about three days every month. But only because she can't help it. ;)

What can you say, it's that friggin curse, man! :wtf:


Junk~

[delusionsofNORMALity]

does this mean that fewer incidents of fire and brimstone, devastating floods and plagues, and a general decline in heavenly wrath? i suppose it was bound to happen, but why choose someone from michigan of all places. i hope this really is a temporary situation and doesn't signify a radical shift from the patriarchal institution we have all come to know and love.

p.s. -

does this mean that all adherents to the muslim faith must now face detroit during their prayers or is this just a christian thing?

[JunkYard]

Well, I sat down with the big guy, he's a facinating individual btw, and he said there was never any type of heavenly wrath in the first place, lol! I asked about the flood, and sodom and gamora, and the 10 plagues and so forth, he said friggin mankind man!! They always blamed me for this type of shit!!

Then I asked about the forbidden fruit, and he was fairly hush hush about this one. He said "You guys have to figure that one out on your own, but I'll give you a hint", and he said absolutely nothing. Ha, go figure! He probably lost his train of thought. He had sipping on some tequilla with lime juice beforehand.

Now to you question. The chick has no idea what sh'es doing, man! The big guy said this himself. She's one of those who think the big guy is a power tripping sadist, so there's no telling what we're in for. She actually made the comment that she's gonna do things they way he did them.

Oh brother, she still believes in fire and brimstone, and plagues, and heavenly wrath towards the so called wicked. I suspect she'll be cool until that time of month, but who knows...


Ch ch ch changes....

[delusionsofNORMALity]

yeah, the big guy's a hoot. he likes to act all mysterious and shit, but he's really a bit of a goof ball. i am a bit concerned about this new girl though. i hope this is just a bit of first day jitters, but it seems to be raining fire and my living room is knee deep in locust. with any luck she'll get the bugs (no pun intended) out of the system and things will be back to normal soon. well i've gotta run, the rain just turned to blood and it's staining the carpets.

by the way, is he still partial to patron? i was thinking of sending him a little present and if he's gone back to the cheap stuff i can save myself a few bucks.

[JunkYard]

He's been drinking Jose Cuervo Black lately, bro. I bought him a bottle about a week ago. He loves the stuff, too. He likes lime juice with his, but no salt...go figure, lol!

I know what you mean about the new girl, man. Things have been weird around here this morning. I swear, she just starts and already we have a blood red sky. What that means I have no clue, or maybe she just thought it was pretty./shrug

I also notice a few butterflies. I mean wtf! Its Feburary for Gods sake!!! She may be bringing spring in early this year, which won't be bad...just a little odd is all.

Good luck getting the stains out , man. you should send her the bill. Just talk to the big guy and he'll back you up. (A bottle a Cuervo black should help) I got his new nimber somewhere...Geesh, where did I put that thing??

He's down in mexica right now, I'll have to find the addy to. Wait, did he leave you his forwarding address? Surely he did, I mean you guys are pretty tight right?

[delusionsofNORMALity]

the ruined carpets and drapes i could put up with, but now she's gone entirely too far. i just looked out my front door and saw a bunch of guys in helmets and funny white dresses nailing my gardener jesus to a cross. who the hell's gonna mow the lawn?! i think this broad has watched too many charlton heston movies. i tried texting the big guy, but i think he's drunk. probably shacked up with a hooker in tj.

well, i've gotta get to work. hopefully the big dude will be sobered up soon and we can get this whole thing sorted out. just in case, you might keep an eye out for stray lightning bolts. i plan on keeping my head down 'til.... damn it, now it's raining frogs and i forgot to put new wiper blades on the truck. will this shit never end!?

[JunkYard]

o.k. all the butterflies just exploded mid-air!! :wtf: and the blood red sky is now black as night!! My truck won't start and the water out of my faucet has turned to wine...the shitty tasting stuff!!

and yeah, the big guy is with a couple hookers right now. I talked Micheal, you know the angel. He's been keeping tabs on God; I think he's worried about him getting into trouble down here. If you've ever been around him while he's sloshed, he's got quite an attitude, and those TJ officials won't put up with it from an old gringo like him. Man, you better head down there and talk some sense into him. This chick is messin with my mind, and poor Jesus!!

"Big guy, are you there?"

Oh shit!! A pissed off feminine voice just came from the sky, and said "I'M GOD NOW, DEAL WITH IT!!! Man oh man! I think we're screwed, bro!! :(

[mrdevious]

[i]Would you demand worship?

No, just offer my guidance. If I instil fear of punishment for not worshipping me, how would I really know who's on my side?


Would you punish?

No, I think punishment is a primitive idea for a primitive race. Currently a necessary evil I guess. Point is, revenge is a petty self-indulgent notion that doesn't seem very godly to me. Initiating change for the better is where it's at, otherwise you have people trying to control through punishment with ever-so-wise ideas like the war on drugs.


Would you ever destroy the world?

Probably not. I mean, if you're god you could reform it to any way you see fit, right?


Would you ever answer prayers?

I don't know the most efficient means of public interaction, I guess I'd have to be god to know that. With my current limited knowledge, I suppose I'd set up a system of proportional democratic representation and discuss the issues with the leaders.


Would you enjoy the fragrance of good bud?

I would eliminate all the drawbacks of weed (not to mention hallucinogens and opiates), grow the finest strains for my people in the garden that is Earth, and enjoy them in human form with my people every so often (perhapse is some type of ceremony).



Would you Love all of humanity even w/o a belief in you or Jesus?

I would do my best to guide humanity in a direction that is beneficial to all. I would treat them with love and compassion, and try to get them to do the same for each other. Those who comit evil would not be hated by me, and I would discourage others from hating them to. After all, when you get a disease, is the best course of action to hate the disease, or follow a logical course of action to cure it? Hatred is a natural response, even a justifiable response regarding reasonable reaction, but I don't believe it's logically justifiable.


All applications will be viewed by the Big guy if I can get him to put the Tequila down for a few. :cool:

I picture god as more of a peyote guy:thumbsup:

[delusionsofNORMALity]

well, the day went pretty well. i had to dodge a couple of stray lightning bolts, but i've lived through worse. when i got home i found that my gardener was fine. he's got some nasty scars, but he'll be ok. he has picked up a couple of new tricks along the way, i found him standing in the middle of my swimming pool when i got home and my begonias are all dead because my irrigation system now seems to spray cheap merlot all over the place. other than that, the home front seems to be all right.

the big problem seems to be with the big guy. i finally got ahold of him and it seems the old fart's fallen in love. seems he found some sweet young thing down in tj named maria (what is this thing he has about girls named mary?) and he claims to be head over heels in love. well; it looks like we can expect a new messiah in about nine months, but that's not the worst of it. he says he's planning to take a little vacation until the delivery.

i tried to reason with him, but you know how it is with deities in love. i even told him that odin had come out of retirement looking for converts (you know how much he hates that old blow hard), but even that didn't seem to interest him. he said he'd keep an eye on the new broad, but the last i saw of him he was headed back south humming that stupid tune from west side story.

i don't think the old bastard's gonna be much help. if i were you i'd invest in some asbestos undies, there's a smell of brimstone in the air.

[Stoner Shadow Wolf]

if i was god, i'd probably use my omnipotence to eliminate existence itself and let only absolutely nothing be.

OR, i'd go gung ho with my power and create this existence, only difference is i would have a physical incarnation and in general rule the universe, have fun and all that shit, i'd make some ungodly killer bud that just RIPS through you and makes the best bud on earth seem like tobacco. :D

[greenman:D]

I do not belive in a god, i think that man kind are too smart for there own good,people that are suppsosed to be dying are being treated , machines keeping them alive medicines fixing people.
Gods created in peoples sub consious as a after life so they do not have to deal with the fact that they will die and be no longer in existance there for creating a virtual world after death eases there mind.
(just my opinion)
But if i was god i would create some massive disease to cull back human breeding as in fact we are a plague if we were any other speacies we would have culled them back, this planet is infected/over populated and is slowly dieing, we are out own worst enemy.When earths greenhouse gives in and we all fry we will see if there is a god.

[Gatekeeper777]

I would DEMAND that you worship me. After all I would be GOD! If you did not i would smite you with poorly growing plants.


if you were guilty of sin i would give you an afterlife of smoking nothing but ditch dirt.

No bodys perfect not even the world i would leave it but would plant more ganja.

yes i wold answer prayer but only if my followers burnt incence and gave burnt offerings of the finest herb.

If i made it i would enjoy the fragrance, i made all things holy, mankind made them evil.
I would love humanity some even twice if they were good enough.roflmao

[mrdevious]

Oh yeah, I forgot something..... I would also render everybody impotent who had a gene structure that was detrimental to the human race.... maybe just for a couple generations or so, give humanity that extra edge:thumbsup: .

[Stoner Shadow Wolf]

I do not belive in a god, i think that man kind are too smart for there own good,people that are suppsosed to be dying are being treated , machines keeping them alive medicines fixing people.
Gods created in peoples sub consious as a after life so they do not have to deal with the fact that they will die and be no longer in existance there for creating a virtual world after death eases there mind.
(just my opinion)
But if i was god i would create some massive disease to cull back human breeding as in fact we are a plague if we were any other speacies we would have culled them back, this planet is infected/over populated and is slowly dieing, we are out own worst enemy.When earths greenhouse gives in and we all fry we will see if there is a god.


people do not just disappear from existence. they decompose.
Game over.
Try again?

[notransfer]

I'm taking applications for the position of God over the next few months. The first one [God] created everything, but he's getting tired, and has found out about Tequila & lime juice, and well, he really likes the bottle nowdays. He's looking for a replacement as you can't very well govern too good when sloshed, right? He's been doing all kinds of crazy stuff lately...

Anyway, I have a few simple questions about your new position. You must answer each to be considered.

[i]Would you demand worship? I would appreciate acknowledgement...
but may very well be friends with other deities...working hand in hand

Would you punish? hurting psychologically and physically would be punished in a form of karma reincarnation

Would you ever destroy the world? naturally the world I created would have the capacity for a inhabitant triggered apocalyptic chaos...what i believe we are facing now, and it is up to the inhabitants to avoid this chaos if they so choose to live and prosper

Would you ever answer prayers? my world, prayers would be answered by the ones asking the prayer if they lived in accordance with the law I have imagined in a form of karma blessings

Would you enjoy the fragrance of good bud? Jah is a prophet friend of mine ;)

Would you Love all of humanity even w/o a belief in you or Jesus? Belief in me would be hit or miss, but based on good living humanity, chances are being a good person would hit on worshipping me without direct worship persay, I would love all humanity as I do now for its ability to possibly lead a good life and be helpful to the many forms of life around him or her..Jesus would be a buddy deity and we'd probably just shrug and hope for the best when it came to the ones who chose not to adopt a peaceful, non violent existance




???

[jdmarcus59]

I'm taking applications for the position of God over the next few months. The first one [God] created everything, but he's getting tired, and has found out about Tequila & lime juice, and well, he really likes the bottle nowdays. He's looking for a replacement as you can't very well govern too good when sloshed, right? He's been doing all kinds of crazy stuff lately...

Anyway, I have a few simple questions about your new position. You must answer each to be considered.

Would you demand worship? Would you prefer people go to church and give lip service, or would you rather they enjoy life, and appreciate what was made?

Would you punish? Would you punish in an afterlife, or let a persons actions and natural consequence of those actions suffice? Is sin applicable?

Would you ever destroy the world? There's a lot of evil in the world, but would you destroy it, or would you let mankind work it out themselves?

Would you ever answer prayers? A lot of people pray and ask for things; would you answer or just let things work out on their own in their own time?

Would you enjoy the fragrance of good bud? There are a lot of people smoking these days, and many do it to help the connect spiritually. Would you shun this practice, or appreciate the fact that they're enjoying one of the finest herbs in existance, and using it to connect, for medicinal purposes, and for natural relaxation?

Would you Love all of humanity even w/o a belief in you or Jesus? This is the really BIG question. There are many who don't believe, so do you think it is fair for the unbelievers to live w/o your Love, or would you Love them just the same?


All applications will be viewed by the Big guy if I can get him to put the Tequila down for a few. :cool:


Love, if I was GOD i would come to you and offer you to share
in my Kingdom, becaues I made you so that you can have life, and I would
give you my light so you could find your way through the darkness.....