Theory of Sexuality

[dutch.lover]

Does anyone here have a theory about sexual preference? What I mean is, do you guys think people are born being attracted to a certain sex, or is it acquired throughout life, or a mixture of the two?

I have been thinking about this recently, so my theory may not be all that sophisticated but I wanted to hear your guys' views. I think sexual preference could surface out of an initial physical encounter with a person. Here is my own personal example to try to explain this: I have always thought of myself as being heterosexual. I have only ever had romantic relationship with men, and I have never had any sexual experiences with women before. However, I do find myself attracted to women. Maybe I don't feel as strongly towards them as I do towards men, but in general I do find women more attractive. This made me think...maybe if I have a physical encounter with another woman, I will feel more strongly towards women sexually, and then perhaps consider myself bisexual. To apply this generally, perhaps we are all born 'heterosexual' and our first physical encounters with people of either gender is what causes us to be attracted to them sexually later in life. Like, instead of growing up kissing boys- if my first 'real' kiss was with a girl, maybe now I would be a lesbian, or at least bisexual? Since society raises most of us to believe that heterosexuality is the norm, most people automatically are drawn to the opposite sex. If this assumption of society didn't exist anymore, would there be a higher chance of homosexuality? Would it grow close to 50% of the population, instead of the mere 10% it's at now?

What do you all think? If no one responds, thats ok, I just wanted to write all this down anyways.

[DannyMan]

i think i played too many asian video games when i was younger and i now have an never ending thirst for asian girls. i just dont know man

[LIP]

I think it's how were brought up, and the experiences we have as children.

[HazmatTHC]

I always spent almost all of my time around male friends when I was growing up. Never really had any female friends. In fact, I remember being rather uncomfortable around any girls that I did come across, and its the opposite for being around any guys, even if it was someone I had just met. Always enjoyed the company of another guy.

This may or may not be the reason I am gay, but I wouldn't change it for anything, for I love my bf, and that outweighs all the homophobia in the world. :)

*HUGS*

-Haz

[birdgirl73]

I think our preferences are established much earlier than when we have our first experiences. That's certainly what they're teaching us in med school, too. Experiences later may strengthen people's leanings in some way, but generally the experts now standardly believe that our proclivities are determined either in utero or within the first two years of life.

I can remember feeling attracted to men even as a very young girl. I think I was wired that way from the get-go. Not everyone may be as aware of those facts, perhaps, and may need later experiences to help wake themselves up about their preferences. But I still think those preferences are largely inherent in us from our earliest youth.

[justinsane]

I think the more you hang around and associate with a sex, the easier it is to be more relaxed in a social, and possibly sexual way with either sex... i notice that when i had a girlfriend, i was much more social with girls and they were easier to talk to... but then i was single, hung around with all my guy friends, and i suddenly didnt care about trying to get girls.. it wasnt a sexual thing, just social, but it was a difference i could note.

[Lucifuge]

I never really had a choice on whether I liked girls or not, I just always have. I've been sexually attracted to older women, only because they had boobs lmao, for as long as I can remember. Porno had always gotten me excited (probably by instinct), but I never realized why until I turned 13.
Though I'll admit that I do find some guys attractive (mainly Trent Reznor circa 1994, fuckyou all for judging me), I find gay sex gross and would never have sex with them.

[az666]

I think it's genetic, or as birdgirl said when your extremely young.
I don't think your up bringing has very much to do with it...although I suppose it could effect homophobia and denying your (true) sexuality.

I consider myself bisexual, leaning more towards the gay side of things. But I had early experiences with both male and female (and continued to up untill about 6 months ago) and I don't believe that had anything to do with my current sexuality.

I like men...lol thats it...in the same way straight people are attracted to the opposite sex, I am attracted to the same. Nothing I can do about it, I wouldn't want to do anything about it...I am completly comfortable and happy with it.

Edit: I did however grow up with 2 older sisters, and I got on extremely well with girls from a very young age. But I also had male friends from an early age...don't think that effected anything either.

[dutch.lover]

birdgirl is probably right, i took a psych class on human sexuality in the summer and it talked about some studies that have been done that suggest you are born (genetics) homosexual or not. So far they are just theories, but you never know. One study found that men who had older brothers were more likely to be gay (the 3rd brother would be more likely to be gay than the 2nd born, the 4th bro would be more likely than the 3rd, etc).

Nature and nurture both probably contribute to sexual preference but it is interesting to explore other possible theories.

[az666]

Yeah what you said about first encounters could be true....although I believe mine was with a girl...lol

But as you said it's all just theories at the moment...
I wonder if they will ever actually find out what makes someone gay, haha

thinking about it I don't think they will, it's a bit like trying to find out what makes someone straight.
I guess it's just another part of life.

but maybe one day

[187]

i think its human nature to be heterosexual because that is how we produce. I don't really understand how a person can be homosexual. I'm not against them or anything but peoples main purpose is to reproduce.

[dutch.lover]

That would make sense from an evolution and biological standpoint. however, there must be more to it. humans aren't the only species who are homosexuals you know- there are many animals who engage in sexual activities with members of the same sex. i read a whole article about that somewhere...i will try to find it.

[dutch.lover]

the article i read was about a museum- the Oslo Natural History Museum- that just opened up an exhibit called Against Nature? It features many animals engaged in homosexual sex... it also mentions how many species don't stick to the heterosexual norm. here are a few links to check out

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/6066606.stm

http://www.abc.net.au/news/newsitems/200610/s1775806.htm

[halo]

I agree with most of what has been said here. I consider myself heterosexual or bisexual because i have had sexual encounters with guys but still am way more attracted to girls cause theyre hotter than guys IMO. Anyway i pretty much agree with what ducth lover said.

[jeremy thunder]

homosexuality can be found within any population of animal. the theory is that this occurs evolutionarily. without a homosexual population, the possibility of over-reproduction is too high, so in order to level it out populations will begin to form a group attracted to the same sex.

i identify myself as bisexual, but have yet to find a suitable theory as to why we exist. perhaps bisexuality is meant to create fractions in populations, as our piece of the population can either produce or not produce, so it would create a half, rather than a whole. i don't know, i'm a fucking english major.

[dutch.lover]

im impressed that so many people are interested in this topic! jeremy thunder, is that your theory or one u found somewhere? I think it makes a lot of sense.

[Polymirize]

there's a philosopher named Foucault who critiques the entire notion of sexuality, because its a normalization based upon the practice of sex, rather than anything that has any intrinsic or essential component to it.

By this view, sexuality (much like race) is a social construct and can just as easily be resisted as embraced.

So far in my life at least I've only felt sexual attraction towards women, although I will admit to being attracted to male friends of mine in a different sort of way. Brotherly love I suppose.

[Matt the Funk]

Im kind of bi-sexual-ish. But im leaning way more to the straight side. I think people are born hetero or homo and can't help it. Maybe experiences in early early childhood can effect what your brain thinks, but idk. I think people should just follow their hearts and all that shit, just do what they think feels right.

[az666]

there's a philosopher named Foucault who critiques the entire notion of sexuality, because its a normalization based upon the practice of sex, rather than anything that has any intrinsic or essential component to it.

By this view, sexuality (much like race) is a social construct and can just as easily be resisted as embraced.

So far in my life at least I've only felt sexual attraction towards women, although I will admit to being attracted to male friends of mine in a different sort of way. Brotherly love I suppose.


Hmmm I don't fully understand that.
just the middle paragraph...

But yeah I feel "brotherly" love towards male friends of mine, would never do anything sexually with them. But I also feel sexually attracted to men, and could quite easily see myself spending the rest of my life with a man.

I don't believe there is anything I can do about the way I feel, infact the feelings for men have been increasing over time. Maybe i'm just becoming more comfortable with myself, finding out who I am really am lol

[dutch.lover]

Kinsey- famous sex researcher, came to the conclusion that sexual preference was on sort of a scale. imagine bisexual as being a "5" on the scale, with heterosexual as a "0" and homosexual as a "10". He stated that most people weren't exclusively hetero- or homo-sexual, we are all kind of a mix. I think that is probably true, although his research has been criticized on it's methodologies- so you can't be totally sure what he concluded was all that significant. You should check out the movie done on him that came out pretty recently, it's called "Kinsey, Let's Talk About Sex". It is a great documentary, but very sexually explicit- which is fitting for the type of guy he was. It's a great movie.

[Polymirize]

Hmmm I don't fully understand that.
just the middle paragraph...


http://www.sparknotes.com/philosophy/histofsex/section9.rhtml

Here, I disagree with some of this analysis but the commentary section isn't to bad in terms of drawing out the conclusions. If you're interested I'd recommend his History of Sexuality Vol 1.

[trippruss]

i personally think it is a chemical issue within the brain for some. i have a cuz who is gay & he has 3 brothers that r str8 but he showed signs well before puberty that he was light in the loofers. btw, he is the coolest of them all & i dont hold it against him. matter of fact a cpl yrs ago he told me he had a secret & that it was he was gay. i told him i had one also, i'm a taurus!needless to say i'm his fav cuz. i think alot of flamers are attention whores tho & i'm not too happy with man hating bulldykes. r

[dutch.lover]

is he the youngest brother? if so, it supports a theory i mentioned earlier. check it out.

[harris7]

i think it's biological and pre-birth.

It's as simple as just too much of some hormone.
and then the "girl attractive" part of the brain that is supposto be in a guys brain develops.
thus this girl is a lesbian


It's not "Genetic" though. otherwise homosexuals would have homosexual children. and through evolution that trait would be selected out as homosexuals have a hard time reproducing with each other