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View Full Version : I'm about to fucking cry...



JaggedEdge
10-29-2006, 12:05 PM
Ever go lay down to go to bed and you start thinking about what a fucked up mess your in? I left my previous job because they wouldn't give me a raise when I was doing triple the work figuring it should be easy enough to find a new job. I mean fuck, I work in resturants, though granted I was trying to get out of those kind of jobs. Which is prob one of the reasons I'm in this fucked up mess. So a month and a half later, I'm still fucking unemployed, bills will be coming soon, and I have a fucking speeding ticket to pay sometime in november. Not to mention this is the sentencing hearing, so no more extentions. And to top off being broke, unemployed, and a fucking bum living off my girlfriend; my grades are shit. I'm not doing well this semester at all. I'm not on probation yet, but most likely will be after this semester. I hate fucking school. I want to finsh, I want to get my degree in english and settle for some boring, but well paying, technical writing career. I can't leave college because I don't know what the fuck I would do without a degree. I could go get my real estate license, I always thought being a real estate agent would be a fun job. But if I'm working for a firm, they are just taking most of my money. Not to mention the market changes. One year I could be making bank and two years from than I'm having to sell my house... I've considered technical school, but don't really know what field I would go into... I just feel so fucking lost right now and I can honestly say I haven't felt this way in a while.

I need to change some shit. Sorry, I really needed to vent.

Ignatius
10-29-2006, 12:19 PM
Everyone goes through this.

It's how you come out the other side that really matters. In the meantime try and get yourself a job of any kind. It doesn't matter if you wash dishes, it's a few $ in your pocket. That will help you to see things in a clearer light, and maybe you won't feel as sorry for yourself. Laying down and crying will get you precisely nowhere.

Reefer Rogue
10-29-2006, 12:25 PM
Time heals all wounds my friend.

CityBoyGoneCountry
10-29-2006, 12:28 PM
bum living off my girlfriend

You found a woman who will actually support you instead of you having to support her?

Damn man, what do you have to cry about? You're a lucky a motherfucker. I don't even have a girlfriend, let alone a girlfriend who doesn't expect me to be rich.

RedLocks
10-29-2006, 12:40 PM
looking too far forward can be hurtfull, like bugging out about the real estate and tech school isn't something ya really need to be thinking about now. God bless your girlfriend for being there and helping ya out, now go find some stupid job to line your pockets. Just don't get me started on college degrees and careers heh..I'll bug out and write an essay on it! Most important thing about education to me is to better myself, to gain knowledge, etc, not what career it is gonna get me.

ps. ya damn well better be giving your woman a kiss and hug every time ya set eyes on her ;)

marvelous22
10-29-2006, 12:45 PM
Definetly need to smoke a blunt and chill.

JaggedEdge
10-29-2006, 01:11 PM
Already smoked. I was actually smoking a bowl as I was typing it. I'm feeling a little better now, the court date isn't until the end of the month. So I still have a little time to find a job or another way of coming up with the money. Looks like I may be dry for a while.

ninfan77
10-29-2006, 01:46 PM
You can call the district magistrate re: speeding ticket and tell them you are unemployed. I did that with a $150 ticket. Paid $20/month for 8 months.

CityBoyGoneCountry
10-29-2006, 01:59 PM
Or, if you're not lazy, you can always pay off tickets by doing community service. That's what I did.

the joint meister
10-29-2006, 02:14 PM
srry to hear that bro but things always git better after thur really bad so maybe youll win the lottery or somethin

peace

daima
10-29-2006, 02:32 PM
Ever go lay down to go to bed and you start thinking about what a fucked up mess your in? I left my previous job because they wouldn't give me a raise when I was doing triple the work figuring it should be easy enough to find a new job. I mean fuck, I work in resturants, though granted I was trying to get out of those kind of jobs. Which is prob one of the reasons I'm in this fucked up mess. So a month and a half later, I'm still fucking unemployed, bills will be coming soon, and I have a fucking speeding ticket to pay sometime in november. Not to mention this is the sentencing hearing, so no more extentions. And to top off being broke, unemployed, and a fucking bum living off my girlfriend; my grades are shit. I'm not doing well this semester at all. I'm not on probation yet, but most likely will be after this semester. I hate fucking school. I want to finsh, I want to get my degree in english and settle for some boring, but well paying, technical writing career. I can't leave college because I don't know what the fuck I would do without a degree. I could go get my real estate license, I always thought being a real estate agent would be a fun job. But if I'm working for a firm, they are just taking most of my money. Not to mention the market changes. One year I could be making bank and two years from than I'm having to sell my house... I've considered technical school, but don't really know what field I would go into... I just feel so fucking lost right now and I can honestly say I haven't felt this way in a while.

I need to change some shit. Sorry, I really needed to vent.

94% of everything i learned in school
was bullshit i dont need
84.8% of everything i bought
i got to satisfy my greed. :confused:

dai*ma:stoned:
it doesnt sound to me like you are as lost as you think.
finding out what works, what doesnt work, is part of everything you'll ever do.
a degree might be the key to the door for some, but it isnt for all.
I raised two kids, helping with the grandkids, and i never got a degree, never worked a "regular job", and was always willing to take risks.
stop looking at what you are told you should have, and look at what really makes you happy. you'd be suprised how much stress is reduced by simplifying your life.

DonnieDarko
10-29-2006, 04:29 PM
You really should focus on the great many positives in your life ... do you got your health ??? Some people don't ... Do ya got a brain that works ?? Then figure things out ....

Is crying about your life workin for ya ?? There are lots of people in the world in worse shape. Get to know some of them. Maybe you can even help them ... and if you do, your life might be a little better.

CYRAX
10-29-2006, 04:30 PM
Beleive me, I know how you feel one hundred percent.

Storm Crow
10-29-2006, 05:13 PM
Smoke another one and get out the want ads! Get some cash coming in from ANY job. Crying is a nice stress releiver, but after you finish crying, it's time to get your head together and get busy fixing what's wrong! Always consider moments like this as bottom- then there is no where to go but up. You ARE going to survive this, ya know. You have someone who loves you and your health--that's more that a lot of folks have! Get off the pity-pot, smoke a little sativa, and get your brain working. The answer is out there, you just have to look for it a bit more. It will get better eventually. :thumbsup: If you doubt your strength, think back on all the shit you've been through--you survived all of THAT, didn't you? There is no reason for you not to get through this rough patch! It will be tough for a while, but with someone by your side, you'll make it just fine! Hang in there, baby! :dance:

az666
10-29-2006, 05:26 PM
I somtimes feel like crying over the stupidest things...
Someone will say somthing on TV and I will well up with tears...it happens alot actually.
Tonight was the first night that I had tears running down my face, I have no idea why. I just felt sad and then the tears came. lol

I hope shit starts to sort itself out for you dude!!

NextLineIsMine
10-30-2006, 12:42 AM
Dwelling on your problems, regreting the past, and being envious of others is the biggest waste of time on the planet.

napolitana869
10-30-2006, 12:49 AM
good luck with everything. you seem like a smart guy, i'm sure you'll be able to figure something out.

daima
10-30-2006, 01:12 AM
Beleive me, I know how you feel one hundred percent.

its too much to think about
too much to figure out
stuck between hope and doubt
it's too much to think about

dai*ma:D

CityBoyGoneCountry
10-30-2006, 01:17 AM
Dwelling on your problems, regreting the past, and being envious of others is the biggest waste of time on the planet.

You said it the nice way.

I'll say it the way it has always been said to me...

Stop crying like a little bitch, grow some balls, and do something about it.

Jongbong
10-30-2006, 01:22 AM
this is why i love this board, everyone is helping out man, eeeeeveryone.
i feel your pain, but everyone here is right, you'll figure it out one way or the next. good luck pal

JaggedEdge
10-30-2006, 04:03 AM
OK, well I no longer feel as blah. I smoked a bowl and it helped me fall asleep, but never managed to cry. Anyway I figure I will go and ask for my old job back (again). Not the one I just quit, same company just different resturant where I first started. $7.80 to wash dishes and deal with the store being understaffed and me being over worked. I suppose I should keep looking at it as motivation to do something with my life. I really don't know how some of the older people who work there can do that job every day. I have to kind of admire that (doing what ever it takes.)

I quit this job on 4 different occassions and yet I always seem to go back. I can't escape it. I hate the company, I hate the hours, I dislike most of the people. Yet I keep going back...

I just found a website to find poker games in your area. I will prob try and play in a few of them. Since I was 18 I really just wanted to survive playing poker. Not even WSOP winner, just a very nice little poker career. I love the game and I actually seem to do better after having just smoked a little bit. I was always insane good at our home games (a couple strong players). But when I played online, I lost over $2,000 (citi banks money.) Never have been sure if the house games are that weak or if the internet is just harder to win in. When I turned 21 I went to the casino to play, but they didn't have any live tables. I just played about $20 in the slots and got bored and left. I suppose, once I go back to my old crappy job, I will start building a little bankroll and hitting one of my local games up. I figure it would be cheap enough to realize if I can win in those games they way I won in my normal house games.


Thanks for the responses everyone. It was the thought of maybe having another warrent for an unpaid ticket (been taken care of), while I'm driving around with an expired break tag. Huge crack in windsheild I havn't been able to get fixed yet. I know a lot of places cops usually don't bother arresting people for one unpaid ticket, but here they do. The parishes like their money way to much. I wonder if I could do community service hours in place of a fine? I would much rather pay it by doing something good for someone than giving the parish the money to use on god knows what. They may do it in some cases but am unsure. Most likely not.

Draziok
10-30-2006, 04:39 AM
ever since I've gotten into drugs like mj and xtc, all I can think about is how I want to change my life, and how much better it could be, makes me so sad inside..

but then I think, fuck it, live the moment.

daima
10-30-2006, 01:18 PM
ever since I've gotten into drugs like mj and xtc, all I can think about is how I want to change my life, and how much better it could be, makes me so sad inside..

but then I think, fuck it, live the moment.

it's a wicked world
and we're all in it
but that could change
in a new york minute
holy terror
toxic gas
aint got nothin'
on some killer grass
so pray for peace
until your hoarse
and maybe fear
will run its course
may god forgive our insanity
and we'll keep movin' on

dai*ma:stoned:

Nochowderforyou
10-30-2006, 02:18 PM
I know where you are coming from. I'm in the same spot as you.

I'm having problems holding jobs. My head isn't on straight. I went of heavy meidcation a few months back and I'm just now going back on them because things were really bad. Almost suicide bad, which I don't want to think about or even consider doing.

It's like I want to work, but I want to find a job that I enjoy. I was suppose to start a new job this morning, nothing special, but I bailed out becaise I woke at 4am this morning, shaking from nervousness. I vomited and my head was spinning around in circles. That's part of my anxiety disorder that triggers my depression, than it's all downhill.

I've only been back on meds. for 5 days, so I'm hoping in another week or so, things will be level again and I can start a new job without destroying my stomach with pain.

Wow, great thread. Feels good to vent a bit.

Hopefully things get better for anyone having problems right now. :thumbsup: Good luck.

Bong30
10-30-2006, 02:44 PM
Remember guys it is easier to get a Job when you have a job.

so get a temp job doing what ever.....

Then look for a career you love.....

REMEBER YOU NEVER WORK A DAY IN YOUR LIFE, WHEN YOU LOVE WHAT YOU DO.

Get a temp job and find a job you have passion about..............


Ie I like to snowboard so I working in the snowsports industry for the last 21 years.... I started a new career in June though. Super scary shit... I have kids to feed.

Hang in there guys....... Good luck

Ignatius
10-30-2006, 11:11 PM
Hey Jagged Edge, good luck with your poker thing. I make the majority of my money, or at least half of it, from playing poker. There's no quick fix though. You have to be good to make money at it, and you need to be patient. A lot of people you will play against will be very poor players, but there are sharks in the water..all the time. If you are any good you'll make money, but be prepared for losses, and get used to bad beats and people moaning about corrupt software etc etc. It's a hard world to make it in, most people fail.

Good luck

yabatab
10-31-2006, 12:21 AM
I'm about to cry now.

No, things will get better, they might get worse before they do but
life always goes in cycles you'll find that out later down the road
then look back and say damn that wasn't really that bad at all.