cannabis=freedom
10-13-2006, 07:47 PM
As some of you may have read in an earlier thread, me and a buddy had an idea for a stoner comedy. Anyway, I constructed a minimal outline that will let me write the dialogue and shit. Anyway, the main themes are freedom to do whatever doesn't hurt anyone, and love and such. It actually is deep beneath the surface. Read on and tell me what you think so far. Many of you guys' hilarious stoner stories have been incorporated in, and some of my own experiences.
PLOT FOR THE FILM ??CULTURE WARS?
Scene 1:
Geoff is beating his meat in the basement to porn when his dad comes home. Geoff desperately tries to exit out of it but is caught by Mr. Teedle on the floor with his pants around his ankles.
Scene 2:
Geoff smokes pot with Annabelle and Billy; they are quickly established as his long-time close friends. High Charlie is introduced to the amateur stoners much like Jimmy Page would be to amateur, aspiring guitarists. They all smoke a lot more weed together and get very high, and swap stories and conspiracy theories.
Scene 3:
Mr. Teedle talks to Geoff just before they leave on the drive to the Catholic school Geoff is being sent to. Geoff semi-subtly hints that he feels betrayed by his father??s intolerance of his masturbation. Mr. Teedle does not notice?or perhaps simply pretends not to.
Scene 4:
Geoff tries to slip away unnoticed, but is caught by Annabelle. The real beginning of the infatuation between them. Geoff says he is not good at goodbyes, and could not face a farewell to his best friends.
Scene 5:
Billy, Annabelle and High Charlie decide at Annabelle??s house that they cannot allow Geoff to be sent to Catholic school. Possibly High Charlie has made the ultimate bong, and does not care much for Geoff??s rescue. This is the scene where Billy and Annabelle no longer look on High Charlie as God, but as a very high man with character flaws, most notably and fatally a generally selfish nature.
Scene 6:
Geoff and Mr. Teedle are driving to the Catholic school, when Geoff??s friends come to the rescue. Geoff almost makes a high-speed car escape, but though he manages to throw his luggage in, misses the car due to High Charlie being behind the wheel, and possessing little or no coordination. The next we see Geoff, in the next shot, he is tied up in the passenger seat.
Scene 7:
Geoff arrives at the Catholic school, where he quickly assimilates into the school. He meets Jason, a good Catholic boy who has never done anything ??bad? or rebellious.
Scene 8:
Geoff receives a lesson on the immorality of today??s youth, and how masturbation and marijuana usage has run rampant. Geoff at first takes the attitude of any intelligent, free-thinking person: he dismisses it all as bullshit. But then it sinks in to him; the Christian/government propaganda has taken over. He even throws away the stash he has smuggled in with him (with all funeral rites, of course).
Scene 9:
In an aggression-crazed smoke session, Annabelle, Billy and High Charlie plot a new way to save Geoff from Christianity. The ideas get wilder and wilder, until Billy suggests they simply go to the school, break in, take him out and drive away with him. The others applaud the simplicity, and agree immediately.
Scene 10:
Geoff lies awake at night taking to Jason. They congratulate each other on their respectable Christian morality and values. Geoff clasps Jason??s hand and vows to continue along a path of sober, chaste righteousness until the sweet release of death.
Geoff??s friends arrive at the school and break in completely noisily and indiscreetly, yet somehow no one notices. They come to the dorm room and notify Geoff of their presence. Geoff greets them with heavy enthusiasm, instantly forsaking Christianity (thank goodness), and reverting back to his old ways. They are about to leave, but Geoff insists on bringing Jason with them, out of concern for Jason being on the wrong path: that of a goody-goody Christian boy, and that ??can only lead to boredom and enough pent-up sperm to blind a sting ray.? They therefore wake Jason and persuade him to go, claiming that they are going to a better Catholic school that offers free passage to heaven.
Scene 11:
The friends (and Jason), are driving in Billy??s car and explaining the real deal to Jason. Jason freaks out and demands return to the school; Annabelle has to knock him out. He wakes up some time later and escapes by jumping out the window. Billy dryly comments that ??shame, really; that could have been an awesome storyline.?
The friends hot box the car with some ??ultra-weed? Billy managed to get. They smoke it in the form of an enormous blunt, and when it cuts to forty minutes later, Billy and Geoff are passed out, and the car is ??somewhere near Prince George.? High Charlie and Annabelle, being the only ones who can ??hold this shit?, flirt with each other and definitely the audience sees a spark between them. Before anything can happen, though, they realize that a passed-out Billy is behind the wheel, and manage to stop the car.
Scene 12:
Jason reports to police that he was kidnapped from Catholic school by a car full of stoners, who ??beat him senseless for not engaging in their immoral behaviour?, and he ??only just managed to escape with his life.? Police are outraged, and speak to the government.
Scene 13:
Conscious in the parked car now, but still stoned, the friends hear via the radio that the government and police force declare open warfare upon ??all people who engage in the trafficking or smoking of marijuana, all people who pleasure themselves sexually, and all people who live a nontraditional lifestyle.? Any person guilty of the above crimes may be shot on sight, and it is the duty of every virtuous citizen to kill or capture any they know who are guilty. The friends are alarmed by this, and agree that it is their duty as counterculture people to resist unjust policies, and to continue as they are.
Scene 14:
A party is held, during which High Charlie does the ultimate dance to This is Not Miami. Geoff falls in love with Annabelle while talking to her. The government proclamation is issued by Billy, and all the guests, with the exception of the friends, leave the party to become pot-free. The friends eventually leave Geoff??s house (Mr. Teedle is on a business trip), and when alone Geoff is clearly bothered. He phones High Charlie for advice about Annabelle?as Annabelle is sucking High Charlie??s cock! She keeps sucking as Charlie talks on the phone. After the conversation, Charlie suggests the idea of active resistance against the government.
Scene 15:
At Geoff??s house, the friends listen to the radio government update that calls for all marijuana users who wish to turn over a new leaf to promptly burn all their marijuana. The friends comply with gusto?but they burn it in the form of a BIG FAT JOINT! Over the smoke session they discuss ways to overthrow the government, each wilder than the next. Finally, as always, Billy suggests the simple: steal from Mr. Teedle??s cache of guns, try and recruit followers, and use guerilla warfare.
Scene 16:
The friends go to different houses trying to recruit followers. They visit a house that is raided by the police, and there is a shootout in which the cops are killed. The friends now have to go on the run.
Scene 17:
Inside the government policies. The government reveals to themselves that marijuana is actually a benign substance, but since it would lose corporations (and therefore the government) money, it is illegal, while alcohol and cigarettes (which are very harmful to people, but bring in the cash) are not. They also express their grief at the ??immorality? of today??s young people, and how warfare is a good excuse to ??solve any problem?. Geoff??s father, Mr. Teedle, is revealed as being in government employ, and is sent commanding a small force to bring ??the enemy to justice?.
Scene 18:
The friends have slept in a field, and are on the move again. They agree that remaining in the wild isn??t wise, that that they have to ??find a place to crash at?.
They find such a place in the form of the house of Billy??s cousin, Hoss. Hoss takes them in out of kindness, but makes it clear that he is against marijuana and that the right thing to do would be to turn them in. The friends understand that he is merely ignorant, and educate him against the government propaganda. Hoss sees the light. (Note: no smoking takes place in this scene; the education is entirely verbal).
Scene 19:
Geoff tries to find High Charlie to formulate plans together. He goes into his room and finds Annabelle, not kissing, not blowing, but FUCKING High Charlie. Imagine the most shocked and horrified a character has ever been in a film. They don??t know he saw. Geoff flees, takes the car and drives back to his own house in town. The others do not know where he is, and agree that they have to go on without him.
Scene 20:
The Battle of the Big-Ass Green Field Somewhere; the remaining friends v.s. Mr. Teedle and his squadron. Mr. Teedle is shot and killed by Billy. High Charlie is shot and killed by an anonymous soldier. The others manage to escape.
Annabelle confides in Billy that whereas she was very attracted to High Charlie, she felt little in the way of true romantic feelings for him. She does, however, love Geoff, and is very concerned as to where he is.
Scene 21:
Geoff in his house back home. He has just heard the news that High Charlie and Mr. Teedle are dead, and that the freedom cause seems hopeless. Combine that with having witnessed the girl he loves fucking a friend, and he is on a depression-fuelled drinking bender. Yes, drinking, a very harmful activity.
Once he has drank enough to knock over a horse, his heart stops, and he goes to the beyond. The beyond is a very beautiful and psychedelic forest, and there he finds High Charlie, who apologizes for his betrayal and assures Geoff that it is he that Annabelle truly loves. Geoff confides in his dead friend his deep sense of failure and pessimism, but High Charlie stresses that he must never desert the cause. ??As long as there is breath in your body to take a toke, never desert the cause?. Geoff says that the land beyond death is a beautiful place, and that he wishes to stay there. High Charlie says that his time has not yet come, and that he will be returned to the land of the living.
Scene 22:
Geoff??s heart restarts itself by a miracle, and he is thrown back to this earth. With a new determination he rushes to the cause of his friends. The friends return to the site of the battle and say a few words about High Charlie. Annabelle mentions that ??he was one hell of a fuck?, but tells Geoff that it is he that she wants. Geoff says goodbye to Mr. Teedle??s corpse, saying that he was on the wrong side, but he simply didn??t have the right knowledge base.
Geoff and Annabelle begin a relationship with each other, and there is a montage of their early times.
Scene 23:
High Charlie??s will is read. It is revealed that High Charlie was actually forty-two years old, but that he ??smoked pot and ate right?. Geoff, Annabelle and Billy inherit his enormous stash of marijuana. The main film ends with the three remaining friends gazing in awe at the off-camera stash, probably enough to stuff a mattress. Shots of them smoking it in bliss are shown during the credits.
PLOT FOR THE FILM ??CULTURE WARS?
Scene 1:
Geoff is beating his meat in the basement to porn when his dad comes home. Geoff desperately tries to exit out of it but is caught by Mr. Teedle on the floor with his pants around his ankles.
Scene 2:
Geoff smokes pot with Annabelle and Billy; they are quickly established as his long-time close friends. High Charlie is introduced to the amateur stoners much like Jimmy Page would be to amateur, aspiring guitarists. They all smoke a lot more weed together and get very high, and swap stories and conspiracy theories.
Scene 3:
Mr. Teedle talks to Geoff just before they leave on the drive to the Catholic school Geoff is being sent to. Geoff semi-subtly hints that he feels betrayed by his father??s intolerance of his masturbation. Mr. Teedle does not notice?or perhaps simply pretends not to.
Scene 4:
Geoff tries to slip away unnoticed, but is caught by Annabelle. The real beginning of the infatuation between them. Geoff says he is not good at goodbyes, and could not face a farewell to his best friends.
Scene 5:
Billy, Annabelle and High Charlie decide at Annabelle??s house that they cannot allow Geoff to be sent to Catholic school. Possibly High Charlie has made the ultimate bong, and does not care much for Geoff??s rescue. This is the scene where Billy and Annabelle no longer look on High Charlie as God, but as a very high man with character flaws, most notably and fatally a generally selfish nature.
Scene 6:
Geoff and Mr. Teedle are driving to the Catholic school, when Geoff??s friends come to the rescue. Geoff almost makes a high-speed car escape, but though he manages to throw his luggage in, misses the car due to High Charlie being behind the wheel, and possessing little or no coordination. The next we see Geoff, in the next shot, he is tied up in the passenger seat.
Scene 7:
Geoff arrives at the Catholic school, where he quickly assimilates into the school. He meets Jason, a good Catholic boy who has never done anything ??bad? or rebellious.
Scene 8:
Geoff receives a lesson on the immorality of today??s youth, and how masturbation and marijuana usage has run rampant. Geoff at first takes the attitude of any intelligent, free-thinking person: he dismisses it all as bullshit. But then it sinks in to him; the Christian/government propaganda has taken over. He even throws away the stash he has smuggled in with him (with all funeral rites, of course).
Scene 9:
In an aggression-crazed smoke session, Annabelle, Billy and High Charlie plot a new way to save Geoff from Christianity. The ideas get wilder and wilder, until Billy suggests they simply go to the school, break in, take him out and drive away with him. The others applaud the simplicity, and agree immediately.
Scene 10:
Geoff lies awake at night taking to Jason. They congratulate each other on their respectable Christian morality and values. Geoff clasps Jason??s hand and vows to continue along a path of sober, chaste righteousness until the sweet release of death.
Geoff??s friends arrive at the school and break in completely noisily and indiscreetly, yet somehow no one notices. They come to the dorm room and notify Geoff of their presence. Geoff greets them with heavy enthusiasm, instantly forsaking Christianity (thank goodness), and reverting back to his old ways. They are about to leave, but Geoff insists on bringing Jason with them, out of concern for Jason being on the wrong path: that of a goody-goody Christian boy, and that ??can only lead to boredom and enough pent-up sperm to blind a sting ray.? They therefore wake Jason and persuade him to go, claiming that they are going to a better Catholic school that offers free passage to heaven.
Scene 11:
The friends (and Jason), are driving in Billy??s car and explaining the real deal to Jason. Jason freaks out and demands return to the school; Annabelle has to knock him out. He wakes up some time later and escapes by jumping out the window. Billy dryly comments that ??shame, really; that could have been an awesome storyline.?
The friends hot box the car with some ??ultra-weed? Billy managed to get. They smoke it in the form of an enormous blunt, and when it cuts to forty minutes later, Billy and Geoff are passed out, and the car is ??somewhere near Prince George.? High Charlie and Annabelle, being the only ones who can ??hold this shit?, flirt with each other and definitely the audience sees a spark between them. Before anything can happen, though, they realize that a passed-out Billy is behind the wheel, and manage to stop the car.
Scene 12:
Jason reports to police that he was kidnapped from Catholic school by a car full of stoners, who ??beat him senseless for not engaging in their immoral behaviour?, and he ??only just managed to escape with his life.? Police are outraged, and speak to the government.
Scene 13:
Conscious in the parked car now, but still stoned, the friends hear via the radio that the government and police force declare open warfare upon ??all people who engage in the trafficking or smoking of marijuana, all people who pleasure themselves sexually, and all people who live a nontraditional lifestyle.? Any person guilty of the above crimes may be shot on sight, and it is the duty of every virtuous citizen to kill or capture any they know who are guilty. The friends are alarmed by this, and agree that it is their duty as counterculture people to resist unjust policies, and to continue as they are.
Scene 14:
A party is held, during which High Charlie does the ultimate dance to This is Not Miami. Geoff falls in love with Annabelle while talking to her. The government proclamation is issued by Billy, and all the guests, with the exception of the friends, leave the party to become pot-free. The friends eventually leave Geoff??s house (Mr. Teedle is on a business trip), and when alone Geoff is clearly bothered. He phones High Charlie for advice about Annabelle?as Annabelle is sucking High Charlie??s cock! She keeps sucking as Charlie talks on the phone. After the conversation, Charlie suggests the idea of active resistance against the government.
Scene 15:
At Geoff??s house, the friends listen to the radio government update that calls for all marijuana users who wish to turn over a new leaf to promptly burn all their marijuana. The friends comply with gusto?but they burn it in the form of a BIG FAT JOINT! Over the smoke session they discuss ways to overthrow the government, each wilder than the next. Finally, as always, Billy suggests the simple: steal from Mr. Teedle??s cache of guns, try and recruit followers, and use guerilla warfare.
Scene 16:
The friends go to different houses trying to recruit followers. They visit a house that is raided by the police, and there is a shootout in which the cops are killed. The friends now have to go on the run.
Scene 17:
Inside the government policies. The government reveals to themselves that marijuana is actually a benign substance, but since it would lose corporations (and therefore the government) money, it is illegal, while alcohol and cigarettes (which are very harmful to people, but bring in the cash) are not. They also express their grief at the ??immorality? of today??s young people, and how warfare is a good excuse to ??solve any problem?. Geoff??s father, Mr. Teedle, is revealed as being in government employ, and is sent commanding a small force to bring ??the enemy to justice?.
Scene 18:
The friends have slept in a field, and are on the move again. They agree that remaining in the wild isn??t wise, that that they have to ??find a place to crash at?.
They find such a place in the form of the house of Billy??s cousin, Hoss. Hoss takes them in out of kindness, but makes it clear that he is against marijuana and that the right thing to do would be to turn them in. The friends understand that he is merely ignorant, and educate him against the government propaganda. Hoss sees the light. (Note: no smoking takes place in this scene; the education is entirely verbal).
Scene 19:
Geoff tries to find High Charlie to formulate plans together. He goes into his room and finds Annabelle, not kissing, not blowing, but FUCKING High Charlie. Imagine the most shocked and horrified a character has ever been in a film. They don??t know he saw. Geoff flees, takes the car and drives back to his own house in town. The others do not know where he is, and agree that they have to go on without him.
Scene 20:
The Battle of the Big-Ass Green Field Somewhere; the remaining friends v.s. Mr. Teedle and his squadron. Mr. Teedle is shot and killed by Billy. High Charlie is shot and killed by an anonymous soldier. The others manage to escape.
Annabelle confides in Billy that whereas she was very attracted to High Charlie, she felt little in the way of true romantic feelings for him. She does, however, love Geoff, and is very concerned as to where he is.
Scene 21:
Geoff in his house back home. He has just heard the news that High Charlie and Mr. Teedle are dead, and that the freedom cause seems hopeless. Combine that with having witnessed the girl he loves fucking a friend, and he is on a depression-fuelled drinking bender. Yes, drinking, a very harmful activity.
Once he has drank enough to knock over a horse, his heart stops, and he goes to the beyond. The beyond is a very beautiful and psychedelic forest, and there he finds High Charlie, who apologizes for his betrayal and assures Geoff that it is he that Annabelle truly loves. Geoff confides in his dead friend his deep sense of failure and pessimism, but High Charlie stresses that he must never desert the cause. ??As long as there is breath in your body to take a toke, never desert the cause?. Geoff says that the land beyond death is a beautiful place, and that he wishes to stay there. High Charlie says that his time has not yet come, and that he will be returned to the land of the living.
Scene 22:
Geoff??s heart restarts itself by a miracle, and he is thrown back to this earth. With a new determination he rushes to the cause of his friends. The friends return to the site of the battle and say a few words about High Charlie. Annabelle mentions that ??he was one hell of a fuck?, but tells Geoff that it is he that she wants. Geoff says goodbye to Mr. Teedle??s corpse, saying that he was on the wrong side, but he simply didn??t have the right knowledge base.
Geoff and Annabelle begin a relationship with each other, and there is a montage of their early times.
Scene 23:
High Charlie??s will is read. It is revealed that High Charlie was actually forty-two years old, but that he ??smoked pot and ate right?. Geoff, Annabelle and Billy inherit his enormous stash of marijuana. The main film ends with the three remaining friends gazing in awe at the off-camera stash, probably enough to stuff a mattress. Shots of them smoking it in bliss are shown during the credits.