Dextromethorphan
05-21-2006, 06:47 AM
I hope this meticulous account will help people know what to expect with this drug.
Psilocybin Induce Reality (Notes)
Around 4:30PM May 19, 2006 I ingested approximately 3mg of dried mushrooms (psilocybin) on a relatively empty stomach. After ingestion, I sat in the living room for around thirty minutes waiting for the effects to come on. Not noticing much, I decided to go and practice piano for a while. A few minutes passed. I began to notice that the glossy keys of the piano had a slightly red hint to them and that my perception of the things outside the window looked ??odd.? As I continued to play, my perception changed significantly ?? it was as if my visual sensors had ??zoomed out? and I was watching my hands move from several feet away. At this point my conscious self was no longer playing the piano; I was merely a bewildered onlooker.
Noticing how nice it looked outside, I decided to venture to the backyard. Walking was fairly odd but not difficult; it actually induced a feeling of pleasure. I walked to a place in the very beautiful where I was surrounded by trees but could still see large parts of the sky. Staring at the trees modified my perception and I saw them differently. It was very much like what happens to the eyes when one stares at a diagram of a cube and sees the back suddenly come to the foreground. This was nice but not too interesting. I got up and walked around aimlessly in my backyard for at least fifteen minutes before realizing that I was a domestic animal (maybe a dog) and that I was confined to the yard (I couldn??t open the gate). As I continued to explore this familiar ground with my new angle of understanding I felt myself undergo several separate realities in which I was several different nonhuman animals. I crawled around on all fours intermittently and sat down in the flowerbeds. As I went though these primal feelings I thought about person to person relationships in depth. I was overwhelmed by the obviously superficial nature of human contact and understood that the relationship of a ??mate? was the most true and natural form of connection between any two living beings. Another primal observation I had was the foolishness and superfluity of male shaving. I was angered that I, a bearded man, even sculpted my facial hair and shaved at all. I tugged on my beard and it felt as though someone else was touching it.
As the light faded I fixated on a flowering tree which held host to many pollinating bees. Through the entire experience I had had a supreme feeling of connection to nature (a very common feeling with psychoactive drugs but very euphoric). This feeling was perpetuated significantly by sitting under the bees. Normally very phobic of flying insects with stingers, I was totally inured and felt completely in harmony with the busy little critters. At this point I moved under the tree and lay down then proceeded to become earth. I believe that this feeling was induced by the horizontal angle of my body and my looking up at the tree as the dirt must. I was no longer a single unit, but rather a bodiless collective of consciousness woven into the natural world. Of all of the experiences of the evening this was probably the most exhilarating. The feeling of being dirt and thus the fundamental element which all life springs from was undeniably a holy experience.
I began to inspect my hands and legs to see what was going on. I saw intense geometric multicolored shapes forming all over my skin. When I focused on myself I turned purple! My flesh turned bright purple like the little girl in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory who ate the blueberry gum. This was very odd because the geometric patterns and the intense colors I perceived were only on my body - the environment around me was, for the most part, still the same.
I was absorbed in the though of nature and fixated myself on the tree and its flowers. Quite suddenly I shifted perspective again and became a tree. Of all of the events this is probably the most difficult to explain. It was the most convincing feeling induced by the psychoactive chemical. I could feel the wind blowing through my branches and I could see through any part of myself; I could take in the world from two feet above the ground or fifty. It was, in the word of Timothy Leary, beautiful. At this point I was also experiencing intense visuals. The world intermittently took on the appearance of a cartoon; everything was very natural and jubilant but altered and somewhat distorted.
I was still totally absorbed by this new feeling of being a tree but remembered that I had dinner plans with my parents and a family friend at 6:30PM that evening. Somehow I managed to take my cellular phone out of my pocket and turn it on while maintaining my ??tree form.? Reading the clock was very difficult and took prolonged concentration (what can I say ?? I was still a tree!) but eventually I puzzled out that it was around 6:18PM. I rolled over and felt myself mold into the wooden garden border that I was touching. Fascinated with the new feeling, I stayed there for a minute taking in this new reality. Remembering that I was obligated to leave, I slowly got up and looked at my house. The building was glowing bright neon red! It was not an intimidating red glow, but it was the first time that evening that I had seen the stronger effects of the drug on a manmade structure (up to that moment I had been in a timeless environment and surrounded only by nature). As I walked into the house I was most affected by my highly distorted depth perception. I had a couple ??door jams? like I was drunk but it was only caused by my awe of what I was seeing. Everything was Technicolor and all objects had their own individual multicolored aura; I was in a manmade rainbow land.
My father came into the room and asked if I was ready to go. Not having enough time to weigh the situation, I simply replied ??yes.? The effect on my aural sensors was very noticeable at that stage. Everything was amplified and highly distorted. The feeling of being an onlooker persisted and I tried to think about how I would process information and react to the conversation if I was in a sound state of mind. We got into the car and engaged in small talk over the five minute drive to the friend??s house. The car ride was incredible; my highly distorted depth perception coupled with the fantastic visuals and ??body high? made for an extremely disconcerting but very enjoyable experience. I took on the perspective of the car and could feel the insides of the car move and the brakes etc. It was hard to form words and respond to the questions my father asked me, but I managed to do so without letting on too much just how out of it I was.
We got to the house and I saw my mother coming out of the front door. She greeted the two of us and asked us to help her load some of her tools into the truck. We complied. When we were finished the friend came out to greet us. All of my senses were heightened, and the smell of her house (one I had frequented often through my life) was overwhelmingly familiar and comforting. I got some ice water to drink, sat down at the table and proceeded to observe these strange creatures (my parents and their friend) interact and move. I noticed how spastically active humans are when they talk and converse with one another. People do all sorts of nervous movements like twitch when they are on the spot and have to think quickly and respond. The conversation at the table seemed to play back to me at about 1.5 the normal speed. All movement was quick and the voices were a bit higher pitched. I couldn??t follow the conversation very well at all, being preoccupied by the moving walls (think Mario Brothers) and the fantastic colors everywhere. Even if the walls had been still, the inconceivably brilliant feeling of ice in my mouth was enough to keep me occupied. Our host put garlic bread and some exotic French cheese on the table and I was overwhelmed by the smells tastes that followed. I would put a small bit of cheese and bread in my mouth and feel the flavor for several minutes at a time while listening to these strange looking creatures exercise their vocal cords.
More talking ensued and thankfully everyone else was drinking wine. Even if I had been terribly noticeable to a straight person no one at that table could tell that I was acting strange except perhaps that I was being a bit quite. Very unhappy to be in an environment where I had to be careful not let on that I was in an altered state, I left the table and went into the bathroom. I didn??t turn on the light because my eyes had become very sensitive and it was more pleasant in the dark. After a very odd experience urinating, I stood up and washed my hands. When I looked up I saw a mirror.
I casually look into the mirror to see whether my eyes were noticeably dilated- which they were - but found myself absorbed in my reflection. It was only a reflection for a few seconds before it turned into something quite different.
As I stared I became aware that I was actually looking at an alien in a different dimension. It had the same facial characteristics that I had, but it was a totally foreign creature. I interacted with it for a while before my consciousness spilled over into the mirror and suddenly I was on the other side! It was a silent experience and not frightening at all, but very strange. My reflection became me. For the several minutes my perception swayed between those two realities until something even stranger happened: I continued to stare into the mirror, but it was no longer just my perception of myself that was changing ?? it was the actual visualization that was changing! My face became purple and distorted. It moved like water and I saw the image as if looking through the strangely molded mirrors at carnivals. I grew horns and began to look like a demon. Feeling a bit disturbed by this new and very real notion, I backed away from the mirror. I turned to go back outside to the party and was confronted with a second, larger mirror. Fascinated, I stared into this for a long time as well, seeing similar things as I had previously. I realized that I had been gone for quite some time so I hurried back to the table where I encountered more of the same odd visuals and distortions of reality. One notable thing about my experience back at the table was a ??tunnel warp? I experienced looking into a blue glass. I was sort of sucked into the spinning vortex inside and became quite nauseous.
At about 9:30PM I decided to leave the party and return home to further explore this profoundly altered state of consciousness. Besides, my head had begun to hurt from all of the focusing I had been doing. The drive home was just as interesting as before only this time what was most noticeable was my perception of colors in the dark. Every light was especially brilliant and invigorating.
Back at the house I decided to stay outside for a while - the psilocybin seemed to want to be outside and in nature. By this time it was quite dark and I went to the backyard and lay down under the open sky. I was very tired and once again I melted into the earth, only this time it was a different feeling: I felt as though I had become part of the primordial soup that life itself had evolved from. I was at the end of the universe as well as the beginning. This feeling was likely the product of my physical exhaustion as well as the start of the comedown from the chemically-induced wonderland. I ended where I had begun. I say that the experience ended here because it was at this point that things stopped being as interesting and introspective. When I stood up and went inside I had a splitting headache. I attempted to simulate a sensory deprivation tank as best I could with some hot water and a totally dark bathroom (there are no windows and I turned off all the lights and plugged the door with a towel), but this failed to produce any serious effect. I went to bed at about 10:40PM and slept until approximately 1:20PM the next day, waking up with an awful headache that persisted throughout the day.
I took psilocybin in hopes of a profound and introspective experience and that is just what I got. The motivation was in my want to expand myself and gain insight into my own existence. I think I??ve accomplished that here more than with any other drug. The world is a beautiful place.
Psilocybin Induce Reality (Notes)
Around 4:30PM May 19, 2006 I ingested approximately 3mg of dried mushrooms (psilocybin) on a relatively empty stomach. After ingestion, I sat in the living room for around thirty minutes waiting for the effects to come on. Not noticing much, I decided to go and practice piano for a while. A few minutes passed. I began to notice that the glossy keys of the piano had a slightly red hint to them and that my perception of the things outside the window looked ??odd.? As I continued to play, my perception changed significantly ?? it was as if my visual sensors had ??zoomed out? and I was watching my hands move from several feet away. At this point my conscious self was no longer playing the piano; I was merely a bewildered onlooker.
Noticing how nice it looked outside, I decided to venture to the backyard. Walking was fairly odd but not difficult; it actually induced a feeling of pleasure. I walked to a place in the very beautiful where I was surrounded by trees but could still see large parts of the sky. Staring at the trees modified my perception and I saw them differently. It was very much like what happens to the eyes when one stares at a diagram of a cube and sees the back suddenly come to the foreground. This was nice but not too interesting. I got up and walked around aimlessly in my backyard for at least fifteen minutes before realizing that I was a domestic animal (maybe a dog) and that I was confined to the yard (I couldn??t open the gate). As I continued to explore this familiar ground with my new angle of understanding I felt myself undergo several separate realities in which I was several different nonhuman animals. I crawled around on all fours intermittently and sat down in the flowerbeds. As I went though these primal feelings I thought about person to person relationships in depth. I was overwhelmed by the obviously superficial nature of human contact and understood that the relationship of a ??mate? was the most true and natural form of connection between any two living beings. Another primal observation I had was the foolishness and superfluity of male shaving. I was angered that I, a bearded man, even sculpted my facial hair and shaved at all. I tugged on my beard and it felt as though someone else was touching it.
As the light faded I fixated on a flowering tree which held host to many pollinating bees. Through the entire experience I had had a supreme feeling of connection to nature (a very common feeling with psychoactive drugs but very euphoric). This feeling was perpetuated significantly by sitting under the bees. Normally very phobic of flying insects with stingers, I was totally inured and felt completely in harmony with the busy little critters. At this point I moved under the tree and lay down then proceeded to become earth. I believe that this feeling was induced by the horizontal angle of my body and my looking up at the tree as the dirt must. I was no longer a single unit, but rather a bodiless collective of consciousness woven into the natural world. Of all of the experiences of the evening this was probably the most exhilarating. The feeling of being dirt and thus the fundamental element which all life springs from was undeniably a holy experience.
I began to inspect my hands and legs to see what was going on. I saw intense geometric multicolored shapes forming all over my skin. When I focused on myself I turned purple! My flesh turned bright purple like the little girl in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory who ate the blueberry gum. This was very odd because the geometric patterns and the intense colors I perceived were only on my body - the environment around me was, for the most part, still the same.
I was absorbed in the though of nature and fixated myself on the tree and its flowers. Quite suddenly I shifted perspective again and became a tree. Of all of the events this is probably the most difficult to explain. It was the most convincing feeling induced by the psychoactive chemical. I could feel the wind blowing through my branches and I could see through any part of myself; I could take in the world from two feet above the ground or fifty. It was, in the word of Timothy Leary, beautiful. At this point I was also experiencing intense visuals. The world intermittently took on the appearance of a cartoon; everything was very natural and jubilant but altered and somewhat distorted.
I was still totally absorbed by this new feeling of being a tree but remembered that I had dinner plans with my parents and a family friend at 6:30PM that evening. Somehow I managed to take my cellular phone out of my pocket and turn it on while maintaining my ??tree form.? Reading the clock was very difficult and took prolonged concentration (what can I say ?? I was still a tree!) but eventually I puzzled out that it was around 6:18PM. I rolled over and felt myself mold into the wooden garden border that I was touching. Fascinated with the new feeling, I stayed there for a minute taking in this new reality. Remembering that I was obligated to leave, I slowly got up and looked at my house. The building was glowing bright neon red! It was not an intimidating red glow, but it was the first time that evening that I had seen the stronger effects of the drug on a manmade structure (up to that moment I had been in a timeless environment and surrounded only by nature). As I walked into the house I was most affected by my highly distorted depth perception. I had a couple ??door jams? like I was drunk but it was only caused by my awe of what I was seeing. Everything was Technicolor and all objects had their own individual multicolored aura; I was in a manmade rainbow land.
My father came into the room and asked if I was ready to go. Not having enough time to weigh the situation, I simply replied ??yes.? The effect on my aural sensors was very noticeable at that stage. Everything was amplified and highly distorted. The feeling of being an onlooker persisted and I tried to think about how I would process information and react to the conversation if I was in a sound state of mind. We got into the car and engaged in small talk over the five minute drive to the friend??s house. The car ride was incredible; my highly distorted depth perception coupled with the fantastic visuals and ??body high? made for an extremely disconcerting but very enjoyable experience. I took on the perspective of the car and could feel the insides of the car move and the brakes etc. It was hard to form words and respond to the questions my father asked me, but I managed to do so without letting on too much just how out of it I was.
We got to the house and I saw my mother coming out of the front door. She greeted the two of us and asked us to help her load some of her tools into the truck. We complied. When we were finished the friend came out to greet us. All of my senses were heightened, and the smell of her house (one I had frequented often through my life) was overwhelmingly familiar and comforting. I got some ice water to drink, sat down at the table and proceeded to observe these strange creatures (my parents and their friend) interact and move. I noticed how spastically active humans are when they talk and converse with one another. People do all sorts of nervous movements like twitch when they are on the spot and have to think quickly and respond. The conversation at the table seemed to play back to me at about 1.5 the normal speed. All movement was quick and the voices were a bit higher pitched. I couldn??t follow the conversation very well at all, being preoccupied by the moving walls (think Mario Brothers) and the fantastic colors everywhere. Even if the walls had been still, the inconceivably brilliant feeling of ice in my mouth was enough to keep me occupied. Our host put garlic bread and some exotic French cheese on the table and I was overwhelmed by the smells tastes that followed. I would put a small bit of cheese and bread in my mouth and feel the flavor for several minutes at a time while listening to these strange looking creatures exercise their vocal cords.
More talking ensued and thankfully everyone else was drinking wine. Even if I had been terribly noticeable to a straight person no one at that table could tell that I was acting strange except perhaps that I was being a bit quite. Very unhappy to be in an environment where I had to be careful not let on that I was in an altered state, I left the table and went into the bathroom. I didn??t turn on the light because my eyes had become very sensitive and it was more pleasant in the dark. After a very odd experience urinating, I stood up and washed my hands. When I looked up I saw a mirror.
I casually look into the mirror to see whether my eyes were noticeably dilated- which they were - but found myself absorbed in my reflection. It was only a reflection for a few seconds before it turned into something quite different.
As I stared I became aware that I was actually looking at an alien in a different dimension. It had the same facial characteristics that I had, but it was a totally foreign creature. I interacted with it for a while before my consciousness spilled over into the mirror and suddenly I was on the other side! It was a silent experience and not frightening at all, but very strange. My reflection became me. For the several minutes my perception swayed between those two realities until something even stranger happened: I continued to stare into the mirror, but it was no longer just my perception of myself that was changing ?? it was the actual visualization that was changing! My face became purple and distorted. It moved like water and I saw the image as if looking through the strangely molded mirrors at carnivals. I grew horns and began to look like a demon. Feeling a bit disturbed by this new and very real notion, I backed away from the mirror. I turned to go back outside to the party and was confronted with a second, larger mirror. Fascinated, I stared into this for a long time as well, seeing similar things as I had previously. I realized that I had been gone for quite some time so I hurried back to the table where I encountered more of the same odd visuals and distortions of reality. One notable thing about my experience back at the table was a ??tunnel warp? I experienced looking into a blue glass. I was sort of sucked into the spinning vortex inside and became quite nauseous.
At about 9:30PM I decided to leave the party and return home to further explore this profoundly altered state of consciousness. Besides, my head had begun to hurt from all of the focusing I had been doing. The drive home was just as interesting as before only this time what was most noticeable was my perception of colors in the dark. Every light was especially brilliant and invigorating.
Back at the house I decided to stay outside for a while - the psilocybin seemed to want to be outside and in nature. By this time it was quite dark and I went to the backyard and lay down under the open sky. I was very tired and once again I melted into the earth, only this time it was a different feeling: I felt as though I had become part of the primordial soup that life itself had evolved from. I was at the end of the universe as well as the beginning. This feeling was likely the product of my physical exhaustion as well as the start of the comedown from the chemically-induced wonderland. I ended where I had begun. I say that the experience ended here because it was at this point that things stopped being as interesting and introspective. When I stood up and went inside I had a splitting headache. I attempted to simulate a sensory deprivation tank as best I could with some hot water and a totally dark bathroom (there are no windows and I turned off all the lights and plugged the door with a towel), but this failed to produce any serious effect. I went to bed at about 10:40PM and slept until approximately 1:20PM the next day, waking up with an awful headache that persisted throughout the day.
I took psilocybin in hopes of a profound and introspective experience and that is just what I got. The motivation was in my want to expand myself and gain insight into my own existence. I think I??ve accomplished that here more than with any other drug. The world is a beautiful place.