How to Stump a Stoner

[jimbroker]

What is your favorite "stump a stoner" joke?


Some of mine:

How do you stump a stoner ?

a) ask "What were we talking about last ?" :confused:

b) ask "Where did you put your stash ?" :confused:

[geonagual]

"Where are your keys"

"What did you have for dinner last night?"

[Fabolous]

"Got any Food?"
"Wtf are we watching?"
"Huh what?"

[mrdevious]

So basically we can go all night listing things people could have recently done.... yeah it gets old pretty quick.

[paperlunatic]

"how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck marijuana?"

[LittLeWinG]

penis

[are you kind]

hey man is that the garage we parked in?
dude what color is your car again?
are you sure we're in the right garage?

[GHoSToKeR]

"what's infinity?"

that question fucked me up.

[MaRiAh]

first person: did you hear that?
stoner: No...
first person: neither did i

[MaryJaneintheCloset]

"Who has the lighter??"

"Whose turn is it...?"

[Fabolous]

"Explane how Life works"
"Whats the meaning of Life"
"Whats the meaning of Love"
"What did i say last?"

[GHoSToKeR]

Stoner1: "Hey, hold this"
Stoner2: "Duuuuhhhhhh okay, hyuck hyuck"
Stoner2: *holds an inanimate object for Stoner2*
Stoner1: *walks away*
Stoner1: "pmgpmg1!!!1!1 pwnd rofl lololol!!"

And thus is the complexity of the stoner mentality.

[beachguy in thongs]

"Do you want this or this?"

[God v2.0]

Chocolate or Cheesecake?

[JMRinFLA]

Cop pulls over a stoner and the stoner says " Sorry Officer, I didn't realize I was speeding". To which the Cop replies "Speeding?" "You were going 15 miles per hour!"

[bentleygtgirl]

if nothing is ever created or destroyed how did we get here....does that theorem apply to humans? im curious.

[Eshelmen]

"This is some good shit!"
When your smoking with some friends...
pick up a frisbee when everything is quiet and throw it madly on the ground and say"Fuck fuck fuck!!!" and they`ll be scared or like wtf:)

[wordddddd]

these are really gay....the best are "You know youre a grower when"

Youre electric bill spikes for about 10 weeks a year
You hold weed in your hand and go, "damnnn that has some serious Nitrogen deficiency!"
You buy weed and say to the dealer, "tell this guy he cured it way too fast..." (a million like that)
Youre vegetable garden has the best soil of anyone on the block.

etc etc

[puffpuffand away]

ok, who got ma lighter
wow, did u c that

[jimbroker]

Hah... JMRinFLA...

That is why I tell all of my friends to at least DRIVE the speed limit... go a little (< 10 mph) over just to look normal!


Jim Broker

[JunkYard]

What are you thinking?

I've been asked that a hundred times, and I can NEVER remember on the spot like that, lol!

[MaRiAh]

Cop pulls over a stoner and the stoner says " Sorry Officer, I didn't realize I was speeding". To which the Cop replies "Speeding?" "You were going 15 miles per hour!"
lmao thats a good one :P

[poorprincess]

"sorry we have no food"

...

"just kidding"

....

"I think"

[Kid Dynamite]

flick your chin towards someone repeatedly, then refuse to tell them what it means. Then when they do it back to you, fly into a mad rage and try to attack them. Works better with someone to hold you back.

or pretend to catch invisible birds as they fly by.

[zephyrinne]

"What do we want to eat?" "What are we going to order?"


Those are the 2 biggest questions asked in my circle of friends. It's all about food when we get baked. We'll either order shit or make a trip to McDonalds.. half the time getting our stuff for free (ordered or McD's).. Most of us worked at a movie theater at one point and we have LOADS of free passes. We trade those for food.. each being worth $7.50. Awesomeness.