Advice please

[Little Miss Blinky]

My mate is 4 wks pregnant and very confused
the bloke whose baby it is dont want her to keep it
what should she do :confused:


Thanks

MissBlinky

[digweed]

if she cant look after it one her own abortion seems the answer.

[Little Miss Blinky]

she lives alone in a 2 bedroom flat quite big with big spare room
but Im not sure being 26 if shes ready .

[Torog]

My mate is 4 wks pregnant and very confused
the bloke whose baby it is dont want her to keep it
what should she do :confused:


Thanks

MissBlinky

Howdy Miss Blinky,

How old is your friend ? Does she have the support and help of her family ?

As for the bloke who got her that way and doesn't want to be responsible for his own child-I'd beat the living daylights out of em,if your friend was my daughter !:mad: I have a daughter who will be turning 26 this month and I told her to never abort a child if she gits pregnant-that I'd raise the child myself,if I have to.

The way I see it-all children are born innocent-no matter the sins of their fathers and mothers,and each child has the potential to save humanity.

Have a good one !

[Torog]

she lives alone in a 2 bedroom flat quite big with big spare room
but Im not sure being 26 if shes ready .

Howdy Miss Blinky,

Dang..I didn't see yer post till after I posted my reply,wow..this really hits home with me,being that she's about the same age as my daughter.

I think that she really should carry the child to term and sue the father for as much as she can in the way of child support and help with the medical bills. A child will transform her life for the better,every child is a blessing and should be treasured.

Have a good one !

[psychocat]

Unwanted pregnancy raises the question of just how serious people are about the consequences of what they do. The pill ,condoms and other forms of contraceptive should have made unwanted pregnancies a thing of the past and yet still people take that gamble. Abortion is a choice, but I personally can't say what would be "best" for all concerned and at 26 I would think that someone should be mature enough to deal with the situation they themselves created. Either way she will have to be capable of living with the choice she makes, the guilt that a lot of women feel at having terminated a life can exact a heavy toll but an unwanted child brings it's own problems.
I have been in the situation where my partner decided abortion was the best option but she has had problems living with the choice she made.
Tough call either way but it's something only she and the guy can decide.

[chisme]

My mate is 4 wks pregnant and very confused
the bloke whose baby it is dont want her to keep it
what should she do :confused:


Thanks

MissBlinky


lmao lmao lmao im just simply amazed that your asking us that


how about this one my gf's mates tits are hairy should she shave them?


duh if a bloke dont wanna have a baby wiv u dont have it? wait untill she's got 2 parents on the list

[pabloescobar209]

Adoph Hitler's mother was considering an abortion, but was talked out of it by her doctor...

[highjinx]

Adoph Hitler's mother was considering an abortion, but was talked out of it by her doctor...

LMAO!

[likemclever]

first off you don't need a man to raise a child. You just need them for the first part and then you can just get rid of there worthless asses.

It just floors me how SOME guys can just have the attitude of "not my problem" and just take of like they are leaving you with the dinner check. They abandon there own children without a care in the world. Itâ??s a good thing that men are not responsible for the survival of the species. This is not a total dump on men cause believe me there a quite a few dirt bag mothers.

I was 26 when I had my child and your friend will be OK. My advice would be to have the child. And document everything about the fatherâ?¦document every single dollar he gives her, every phone call he makes to herâ?¦.everything. Typically what happens is that the looser guy goes and lives his life as he pleases without a care in the world until that child turns about 5 years old or so. Then they come to the realization that their own children despise them because of the abandonmentâ?¦.then all of the sudden they want to â??playâ?� father.

Document everythingâ?¦.go to court and get sole custody.

Just another thing I bet this guyâ??s parents donâ??t know about the childâ?¦.maybe someone should tell them.

Most parents would be furious to know that their son is a coward who is running out on their Grandchild. His parents may want to help support their grandchild even if their son doesnâ??t.

[Nochowderforyou]

If this is an unwanted pregancy, don't get an abortion. Abortion, I think, should only be done in the case of rape. Any other time, if you can't keep it, then adopt it, please. There is blood flowing in the fetus after 20days, and a heartbeat after 24days. That is a life and an abortion will kill it.

I can't stand people who get an abortion because they made a mistake.

[benagain]

how much you wanna bet this asshole will try and get out of it by saying it's not his kid? Someone needs to kick him in the eye a few times. A guy like that doesn't sound like he'd make a good dad anyway.

and on a side note. it's complete unfair bullshit that some people who don't want kids have them like crazy, but people who are ready for one and really want one never get pregnant. Me and my wife were trying for over a year before we moved and didn't get shit execpt a lot of fun. I've heard of people spending thousands of dollars trying to get pregnant only to come up empty every try.

[3rdEyeVision]

get her to put it up for adoption becaus she wont be able to give the baby any more than what it wants, she can always have another one but if she decides to keep this one thats it lol

[lemonboy]

Abortion is the last thing I would ask a stranger's opinion about. It's one of those deeply personal decisions that will affect her for the rest of her life. The droning voices of those that have not only read but memorized every anti-abortion pamphlet offer no help when it comes to the reality of the situation. It is a decision that she alone pays a price, regardless of the outcome.

[snikitysnak]

abortion is not the wya to go. think about adoption. so many people would like a healthy baby that can't have one!

abortion=murder

but other people are right, this isn't really a question for this board, lol

[bonsaiguy]

First, I would like to reiterate my belief that in the 21st century, the word accident does not apply. There are too many option for preventing a pregnancy, ranging from condoms, diaphrams and pills to just keeping your damned legs closed if he won't wear any protection.

Second, abortion is not birth control. It is the voluntary termination of a living being. If you are talking rape or incest, that's different. But I gather you are not. But the documented psychological and physsiological effects of abortion can be brutal so it's generally not a good idea.

Third, if she really feels she cannot raise a child, (and she probably is not there yet since she was dumb enough to get knocked up in the first place, and at 26, like I said, there is no excuse) she should seriously consider carrying the child to term and giving it up for adoption to a good family that will give the child a life with 2 parents. There are even adoption programs that will allow her to stay in the childs life. Statistically speaking, children who are raised by a mother and father tend to fare better in the long run of things. This is not a sexist statement but rather a documented fact.

Fourth, if she does choose to raise the child herself, then she should pursue the idiot who knocked her up and take him to the cleaners for support.

Fifth...for heavens sake...don't marry the bum just because she's pregnant.

PS: Lemonboy is correct, this is not the best place to be asking for advice.

[Dr. Dro]

Accept responsability and let the innocent baby live.

[Skink]

first off you don't need a man to raise a child. You just need them for the first part and then you can just get rid of there worthless asses.

It just floors me how SOME guys can just have the attitude of "not my problem" and just take of like they are leaving you with the dinner check. They abandon there own children without a care in the world. Itâ??s a good thing that men are not responsible for the survival of the species. This is not a total dump on men cause believe me there a quite a few dirt bag mothers.

I was 26 when I had my child and your friend will be OK. My advice would be to have the child. And document everything about the fatherâ?¦document every single dollar he gives her, every phone call he makes to herâ?¦.everything. Typically what happens is that the looser guy goes and lives his life as he pleases without a care in the world until that child turns about 5 years old or so. Then they come to the realization that their own children despise them because of the abandonmentâ?¦.then all of the sudden they want to â??playâ?� father.

Document everythingâ?¦.go to court and get sole custody.

Just another thing I bet this guyâ??s parents donâ??t know about the childâ?¦.maybe someone should tell them.

Most parents would be furious to know that their son is a coward who is running out on their Grandchild. His parents may want to help support their grandchild even if their son doesnâ??t.

Your post wreaks of prejudice...

She should know who she opened her legs for...

[altagid]

What does she want to do?
Is she still together with the father and what are her plans with him?
Is abortion an option for her - I mean psychologicaly or whether her beliefs allow it?

Raising kids is very very hard work. If she can rise willingly to the challenge its one thing - otherwise she might feel resentful and trapped and that will cost the child too!

[Skink]

It's a life decision and she needs to make it... How much can her conscience handle??? If she aborts she looses a part of her that she will never get back,can she live with that???

[benagain]

Wish I had a kid. My friends kid is starting to get to that age where all he wants to do is hang out and play. Sometimes I'd give anything to have a kid to raise pass on my knowledge and experiances. It's a great thought to know that when I die, I may have someone else to carry on my spirit.

[nuggetgirl]

Here's my email [email protected]
Tell her if she don't want that baby to email me and she can bring it here and I'll take it.
Damn floosies, need to keep their legs shut if they don't want to get pregnant. Or damn, at least use a condom. Tell her she needs to get an HIV test too.
Being 26 years old, doesn't she know any better?

[Euphoric]

I know a lot of people who would of appreciated being aborted and even more whom i would have appreciated being aborted ^

[likemclever]

Your post wreaks of prejudice...

She should know who she opened her legs for...

OK cool ....maybe you should go down to the welfare office look arround the lobby and see how many dads you see waiting there with their children. I was there yesterday and I didn't see any.

If a single woman gets pregnant now days she better be prepaired to care for the child by herself......sad but true.

[altagid]

The point is to help her, and if possible the baby too, now, not to judge her or condemn - thats always easy! We all should have been smarter IMO luckily we mostly dont get punished for it.

[Breukelen advocaat]

No man should be forced to support a baby borne of a women that he did not have a contract, such as marriage, with.

The custody of children, in the case of a marriage breakup, should almost always go to the ex-husband. This way, less homes will break up - as is the case in Japan and Switzerland. If this society wasn't so retarded by religion, people could have their extra-marital affairs on the side, and maintain a home AT LEAST until their children are old enough. In the case of criminally abusive spouses, then there would be provisions and exceptions to these laws for the sake of the children.

Unwed mothers who cannot support their offspring, and when father is unwilling or unable to voluntarily do it, should be relieved of this problem and the children placed in well-run orphanages, or in the care of adoptive-orientated responsible couples. Patriarchal-based solutions are what we need in this society. We don't need a "village", as Hillary has advised. She's from the upper classes, and has no clue as to what poverty is like.

[benagain]

No man should be forced to support a baby borne of a women that he did not have a contract, such as marriage, with....


ummm what?? :confused:
So what you're saying is a guy can stick his dick in anything he wants and not have to worry about the consiquences? Fuck it, let other people worry about it? That's just plain dumb. Now is the father is a wild monkey, then I could maybe understand, but if it's from a zoo, then his as is getting a job.

[Breukelen advocaat]

ummm what?? :confused: So what you're saying is a guy can stick his dick in anything he wants and not have to worry about the consiquences? Fuck it, let other people worry about it? That's just plain dumb. Now is the father is a wild monkey, then I could maybe understand, but if it's from a zoo, then his as is getting a job.

First of all, it takes TWO to tango. If a women does not take advantage of birth control, and if necessary as a last resort, abortion, then the decision to have the baby is hers.

Many men have been lied to by women, regarding their using birth control. Why should they have to pay?

Women in the U.S. simply have too much power, legally - and the men have no rights, and are significant financial supporters of women (through court ordered child support) that, in many cases, are often unfit parents.

If you are a man, you should support men's rights. If we keep going towards matriarchy, we go backwards. Our inventions, scientific and medical breakthroughs, better ways of life, etc., were made possible by a system of sex roles that worked better than those that are starting to re-introduce themselves.

I am in no way "religous" at all. It is not a question, to me, of "morality" - but doing what's best for an advanced society. We need to reintroduce the concept of "bastard" into this society - and make single-parenthood an undesirable thing. Hell, I'm asking that MEN be given the biggest financial burden, including primary responsibility for their families - but they MUST be given some rights in return. Right now, the situation sucks so bad that I'm eternally grateful that I didn't have kids with some baby-crazy nitwit.

[benagain]

Yes that's all a very nice opinion on what you beleive to be the truth. I was commenting on what you had said..


No man should be forced to support a baby borne of a women that he did not have a contract, such as marriage, with....


That I'm affraid is stupid. Maybe I didn't make myself clear. If a guy knocks up a girl and gets her pregnant, it is just as much his responsibility to care for that child and the well being of the mother as it is the girls. So what she didn't stick to her birth control, so what. You understand how a baby is made and you know what can happen when you have sex. Accept the consiquenses of your actions. Marriage and contracts have nothing at all to do with it. It's about doing the right thing as a man. If men behaved the way you describe, there wouldn't be any respectible fathers to raise any kids.

[tootsie roll]

In this day and age, with all the birth control options, it pisses me off when people can't be responsible. No reason in the world for so many "oopsies". And it pisses me off even more when I hear someone say that they're gonna keep having babies so they can keep getting more and more money from the TAXPAYERS WHO WORK FOR A DAMN LIVING.:mad: Fucking leeches of society and waste of skin.

[Breukelen advocaat]

Yes that's all a very nice opinion on what you beleive to be the truth. I was commenting on what you had said..
That I'm affraid is stupid. Maybe I didn't make myself clear. If a guy knocks up a girl and gets her pregnant, it is just as much his responsibility to care for that child and the well being of the mother as it is the girls. So what she didn't stick to her birth control, so what. You understand how a baby is made and you know what can happen when you have sex. Accept the consiquenses of your actions. Marriage and contracts have nothing at all to do with it. It's about doing the right thing as a man. If men behaved the way you describe, there wouldn't be any respectible fathers to raise any kids.

That is not true, and history proves that. It is NOT right to force child support payments on a man - especially if the couple is not married. Women have ALL the rights to deliberatly not use birth control, and/or refuse to get an abortion, and the man is forced to pay for the unethical behavior of the slut - even if she lives with, or even marries, other men. There are NOT many "respectable" fathers because the system gives them no rights. There is not even an incentive anymore to be a father - I think that guys that have kids are making a mistake, in most cases. Look at the divorce rate, the rates of single parenthood (usually females), "deliquent dads" that have been fucked over, the high rate of crime amoung young people from broken homes - without a father figure. There's no "men" anymore - legally, socially, and economically we're the "niggers" of the sexes - and if we don't wake up, the lunatic fringe of religous people will take over everything.

Men UNITE! It's only common sense.

[benagain]

So why can't the man get a vasectomy if he's so worried? If you don't want kids and you don't trust women, get one and be by yourself your whole life. More power to you. But sleeping around and not claiming any responsability is like firing a gun in the air and not caring where the bullet lands.

also, if guys shouldn't have kids, how the hell is anyone gonna be born? Were you a planned child? I know I sure as hell wasn't, but I'm happy as hell and I do my part to try and better the world.

[Torog]

That is not true, and history proves that. It is NOT right to force child support payments on a man - especially if the couple is not married. Women have ALL the rights to deliberatly not use birth control, and/or refuse to get an abortion, and the man is forced to pay for the unethical behavior of the slut - even if she lives with, or even marries, other men. There are NOT many "respectable" fathers because the system gives them no rights. There is not even an incentive anymore to be a father - I think that guys that have kids are making a mistake, in most cases. Look at the divorce rate, the rates of single parenthood (usually females), "deliquent dads" that have been f*cked over, the high rate of crime amoung young people from broken homes - without a father figure. There's no "men" anymore - legally, socially, and economically we're the "niggers" of the sexes - and if we don't wake up, the lunatic fringe of religous people will take over everything.

Men UNITE! It's only common sense.

Howdy BA,

I think that it's right to make both the man and woman responsible,married or not,especially if a chil is concieved because of irresponsible promiscuity. I do agree that men need to have more rights in regards to whether an abortion should be performed or not,there are many men who want to have children and are willing to be fully responsible for them.

I don't like the use of the word "slut" and it makes me wonder if you think of all women as being "sluts" ? As the father of a beautiful,wonderful daughter,it pisses me off mightily:mad: ,when men talk about women in those terms..if anything-we have a problem with man "sluts",who will do or say anything to a woman,to git her into bed.

I left my wife and took my daughter,when she was old enuff to decide legally,who she wanted to live with,and finished raising her on my own,without hardly any help from her mother,because her mother was more interested in going to the bar,than being at home with her daughter. My daughter never got into drugs or sex,in school,and finished highschool in the top of her class,I re-dedicated my life to her and put my wants aside.

So when a child is concieved,it's time for the parents to grow up and put their wants to the side and consider the needs of the child first,it becomes a bigger issue than just the wants of the mother..it's no longer about whether a man or woman refuses to be "in-convienced" by a child. Certainly,there should be consideration given for the health impact to the mother,and not nearly so much about whether it's "in-convient" or not.

Have a good one...

[Breukelen advocaat]

[QUOTE=Torog]Howdy BA,

I think that it's right to make both the man and woman responsible,married or not,especially if a chil is concieved because of irresponsible promiscuity. I do agree that men need to have more rights in regards to whether an abortion should be performed or not,there are many men who want to have children and are willing to be fully responsible for them.

In these days,with the easy availability of family planning, there is no reason that a person must have children in the event of an unplanned pregnancy. If you don't agree with abortion, fine - but when sperm fertilizes the egg in an ovary it's nothing more than a chemical reaction of nature. Making it into some kind of "miracle" is just superstitous nonsense.

I don't like the use of the word "slut" and it makes me wonder if you think of all women as being "sluts" ? As the father of a beautiful,wonderful daughter,it pisses me off mightily:mad: ,when men talk about women in those terms..if anything-we have a problem with man "sluts",who will do or say anything to a woman,to git her into bed.

I do not think that most men will "do or say anything" just to get a woman into bed. In my case, I was fortunate enough that I didn't need to lie, or pay for sex (well, I paid for dates). I also wouldn't have children under the type of system that we live under - which is going more and more towards matriarchial/matrilineal - in other words, back to the days of savagery. We CREATE "sluts" by rewarding bad behavior and creating contempt for the father (and men in general).

I left my wife and took my daughter,when she was old enuff to decide legally,who she wanted to live with,and finished raising her on my own,without hardly any help from her mother,because her mother was more interested in going to the bar,than being at home with her daughter. My daughter never got into drugs or sex,in school,and finished highschool in the top of her class,I re-dedicated my life to her and put my wants aside.

Men have given up their role as the head of the household - but you have shown that you were a fine parent and provider, which is admirable.

So when a child is concieved,it's time for the parents to grow up and put
their wants to the side and consider the needs of the child first,it becomes a bigger issue than just the wants of the mother..it's no longer about whether a man or woman refuses to be "in-convienced" by a child. Certainly,there should be consideration given for the health impact to the mother,and not nearly so much about whether it's "in-convient" or not.

This society is moving towards a primitive system, and the men have relinquished their rights to control by people that have ingrained in them lousy values that are the end result of bad "liberalism" and "conservatism". We need to have PRIDE in ourselves: having children out of wedlock, making men pay for children out of wedlock that they never wanted, and female heads of households (unless she's a widow), are not good ideas. This is MY version of "conservatismâ?�: Responsibility without rights is not American. Men should demand their rightful role as the head of the houshold and primary caregiver of children born into a LEGAL union. Sex outside of marriage is fine, but the women cannot expect the man to assume the role of their "husband" just because they forgot to put in their diaphram, or take a pill.

[Breukelen advocaat]

So why can't the man get a vasectomy if he's so worried? If you don't want kids and you don't trust women, get one and be by yourself your whole life. More power to you. But sleeping around and not claiming any responsability is like firing a gun in the air and not caring where the bullet lands. also, if guys shouldn't have kids, how the hell is anyone gonna be born? Were you a planned child? I know I sure as hell wasn't, but I'm happy as hell and I do my part to try and better the world.

First of all, condoms should be used unless the parties are absolutly sure that they are disease free. Using a condom also has the added benefit of birth control.

My wife and I are THINKERS: Two Healthy Incomes No Kids Early Retirement.

I'd rather see the human race voluntarily extinguish itself, with dignity, by not procreating more people. This is a much better way to leave the planet than by nuclear warfare, ecological man-made disasters, overpopulation or other self-destructive acts of stupidity. Perhaps an INTELLIGENT life form can evolve here in the future.

There IS a loosely-knit organization of people that would like to see the human race peacefully put an end to itself called The Voluntary Extinction Movement:
http://www.vhemt.org/

[UnViaje]

i'm with ba dammit, plenty chicken heads from around the way think about getting paid like that, no fukn shame. I've had stupid friends both guy n girl do retarded shit like have accidents, one case my homies chick used the condom to get herself pregnant, now hes paying for it. I agree with manning up n taking responsibility but only when things are decided beforehand. that chick is like another girl from 'Maury' if she aint even knowing who the fukk is the pops, "You are not ... the father" ... "WOOP WOOP!!! I told yall she was a ho!!"

[tadaa]

My mate is 4 wks pregnant and very confused
the bloke whose baby it is dont want her to keep it
what should she do :confused:


Thanks

MissBlinky

So this babies life is going to be decided by a bunch of strangers on a internet forum? Are you fucking kidding me? On second thought, I doubt I'd want her raising a child if she's this stupid, he'd probably grow up to do more harm than he would ever do good.

[lemonboy]

So this babies life is going to be decided by a bunch of strangers on a internet forum? Are you fucking kidding me?LOL. I agree. The realities being spun are so far removed from the simple situation presented it's just comical.

[Breukelen advocaat]

Howdy Miss Blinky, How old is your friend ? Does she have the support and help of her family ?

Her Family has nothing to do with it, if she's an adult.

As for the bloke who got her that way and doesn't want to be responsible for his own child-I'd beat the living daylights out of em,if your friend was my daughter !:mad: I have a daughter who will be turning 26 this month and I told her to never abort a child if she gits pregnant-that I'd raise the child myself,if I have to.

Your solution of violence is a good example for the young: girl get's pregnant by not using common sense, and her father commits felonious assault against her lover. Great way to live!

The way I see it-all children are born innocent-no matter the sins of their fathers and mothers,and each child has the potential to save humanity.

Children NOT being born is a bigger favor to humanity. The odds are much greater for a child to become a mass-murderer than someone who discovers a cure for cancer.



Torog, would you think that aborting Hitler, Stalin, bin laden, Mao, and other mass-murderers, and even lesser criminals, is wrong? Abortion has made New York City a much better place since the benefits of Roe vs. Wade kicked in during the 1990's: We're now the safest of the 20 biggest American cities.
Abortion is not even very popular anymore: birth control has taken care of what it's meant to do. The Catholic Church, and other some religious organizations, are against ALL forms of artificial birth control: therefore, they are in favor of creating crime and misery. It keeps the degenerate clergy in business - which is the act of enslaving people through fraud.