Attention!!!

[God v2.0]

I, your new upgraded super-omnipotent nuclear power god, am here to service you. Any questions directed to me will be answered to the fullest possible extent of the truth. I am here to educate mankind and provide a basis of peace and understanding for each other.

I'm gonna start by stating a few of the most obvious truths that many MANY people still don't believe.

I don't exist.
You don't exist beyond a few billion atoms jumbled together.
I don't give a shit about you. When you pray and build churches it enrages me and when the time comes if you are still worshiping me I will smite you down so that you can experience the full irony of your pathetic attempts to please me.
You have no purpose at all except to breed.
You were brought into existence by mistake when a much more advanced civilization sent out a probe which eventually crashed into your young planet, there was a small amount of genetic material on board which was ingested by a female primate that was pregnant. That was the start.

So, in a service to you I will provide you with wisdom from a source you cannot comprehend.

So post your questions and have them answered.

[Musician]

ok.

heres my first question: do you have a life?

heres my second question: do you need attention?

[God v2.0]

Answers:

1. This question may be hard to answer, are you asking me whether or not I am alive or am I in the posseson of a particular life?

2. I'm sick of attention, I have to block out all the idiots who pray to me and worship me instead of doing something productive and useful with their time.

[Genuine17]

another tokosan

[Musician]

another guy trying to be like McCaulay Culkin (altought Mccaulay was cool and this guy seems more like a fag)

[stangle12]

we need a block button. and once 60% of us block you...you get exiled.

[activedenial]

We are here to utilize the resources for our benefit. We also serve the purpose of breeding. Anything that can be invented probably already has been in the universe. Nobody knows what happens when they die so leave it at that.

[SomeGuy]

we'll see...

If its another Tokosan like personality...Im gonna ask Ron if we can set up a vote-ban system or something...

otherwise...welcome to the boards

[Musician]

we'll see...

If its another Tokosan like personality...Im gonna ask Ron if we can set up a vote-ban system or something...

otherwise...welcome to the boards

would be a good idea man

i think im gonna write this in suggestion forum

[Az.]

Just a couple of quick questions.

Q1-Did you create the genetic material onboard the probe that crashed into earth?

Q2-where does wind originate from?

Q3-What 2 main colours is my room?

Q4-Will they ever make a new series of futurama?

Q5-Why are you "here to educate mankind and provide a basis of peace and understanding for each other" if you "dont give a shit" about us? I wasn't expecting "God" to contradict himself on his 5th post!
Wouldn't you rather see our feeble attempts at living forever, or asking questions that no-one can possibly know the answer to? (<---according to the bible) or see us wallow in our own confusion and insanity?

[Musician]

Whats the meaning of life, and whats the meaning of god

if god is all isnt god satan at the same time?

if god created humans one day, does it means the evolution theory (which is more a fact anyway) is bullshit?

is universe infinite? or in continuous expansion? or how is it?

Where do u go when u enter a black hole?

is there something beyond death? if yes, what?

is there aliens anywhere? if yes, where?

if god is so cool and good why doesnt he help the situation on earth?

was god created? if no, that means he always existed? how can u always have existed?

does the universe always existed too?

whats beyond the universe?

[Az.]

sorry i have another question that i forgot to ask....but it has been bothering me for somtime now.....

....you said in the old testament that you would not proove you existed, because proof denies faith and faith is what everyone needs to have in your to enter into heaven......yea?
well....wasn't Jesus you (god) in human form? If so....isn't that proof that god exists???

[God v2.0]

Just a couple of quick questions.

Q1-Did you create the genetic material onboard the probe that crashed into earth?

Q2-where does wind originate from?

Q3-What 2 main colours is my room?

Q4-Will they ever make a new series of futurama?

Q5-Why are you "here to educate mankind and provide a basis of peace and understanding for each other" if you "dont give a shit" about us? I wasn't expecting "God" to contradict himself on his 5th post!
Wouldn't you rather see our feeble attempts at living forever, or asking questions that no-one can possibly know the answer to? (<---according to the bible) or see us wallow in our own confusion and insanity?
1. Yes, but not directly, I created the civilization that created it.

2. Temperature differences.

3. Clear and white.

4. It was already made but was never aired. Only I have seen it (and its sooo good)

5. I am what you would call god. I'm your cognitive ability and I am responsible for everything. I want to educate you and make you understand that there is no God, no person or even consciousness out there that cares about you or can hear you. You are the only person in the universe and you are god. Also in the universe we live in everything and anything are all based on perspective and pertinence. If you aren't supposed to see or know something then you don't. Reality is a figment of your imagination. For example, your brain right now is basically running on a filter called Serotonin, when you use psychoactive drugs it removes/modifies that filter and lets you see things that are really there and are usually just blocked out.

if you can prove me wrong then do it but you cant because you can ONLY see things that you see (seems paradoxical but is VERY easy to understand)

[God v2.0]

sorry i have another question that i forgot to ask....but it has been bothering me for somtime now.....

....you said in the old testament that you would not proove you existed, because proof denies faith and faith is what everyone needs to have in your to enter into heaven......yea?
well....wasn't Jesus you (god) in human form? If so....isn't that proof that god exists???

Get it through your thick skull! I dont exist. I didnt write the bible, i had no influence on religon at all. Except religon cannot exist without me. I am about 2% in material form. But I make up about 99.9% of you. So what am I? Figure it out and you will understand.

Religon was just a sad attempt to understand yourselves. You need to take responsibility for your fucking existence!

[beachguy in thongs]

1. Yes, but not directly, I created the civilization that created it.

2. Temperature differences.

3. Clear and white.

4. It was already made but was never aired. Only I have seen it (and its sooo good)

5. I am what you would call god. I'm your cognitive ability and I am responsible for everything. I want to educate you and make you understand that there is no God, no person or even consciousness out there that cares about you or can hear you. You are the only person in the universe and you are god. Also in the universe we live in everything and anything are all based on perspective and pertinence. If you aren't supposed to see or know something then you don't. Reality is a figment of your imagination. For example, your brain right now is basically running on a filter called Serotonin, when you use psychoactive drugs it removes/modifies that filter and lets you see things that are really there and are usually just blocked out.

if you can prove me wrong then do it but you cant because you can ONLY see things that you see (seems paradoxical but is VERY easy to understand)


LOL, pressure differences, God, it's pressure differences.

[t3chyo]

LOL, pressure differences, God, it's pressure differences.

lol

[Az.]

1. Yes, but not directly, I created the civilization that created it.

2. Temperature differences.

3. Clear and white.

4. It was already made but was never aired. Only I have seen it (and its sooo good)

5. I am what you would call god. I'm your cognitive ability and I am responsible for everything. I want to educate you and make you understand that there is no God, no person or even consciousness out there that cares about you or can hear you. You are the only person in the universe and you are god. Also in the universe we live in everything and anything are all based on perspective and pertinence. If you aren't supposed to see or know something then you don't. Reality is a figment of your imagination. For example, your brain right now is basically running on a filter called Serotonin, when you use psychoactive drugs it removes/modifies that filter and lets you see things that are really there and are usually just blocked out.

if you can prove me wrong then do it but you cant because you can ONLY see things that you see (seems paradoxical but is VERY easy to understand)

oh!.......cool thanks.....

serotonin isn't a filter....its a chemical....it makes you happy....and can be found in brazil nuts ...i think its found in weed as well....along with melotonin which makes you tired....and is also released when you close your eyes.....i read about it the other day....lol

Ok i get the bit about religion....its manmade....but we are man and .........no ill quite while im ahead...

but on a serious note.....im a m interested in the "filter" that you mentioned....if it serotonin then i apologise....but if it was a mistake does anyone know what the name for the filter is?....

[God v2.0]

Whats the meaning of life, and whats the meaning of god

if god is all isnt god satan at the same time?

if god created humans one day, does it means the evolution theory (which is more a fact anyway) is bullshit? evolution and human consciousness are the same thing, consciousness is just the next step of evolution.

is universe infinite? or in continuous expansion? or how is it? This is too complex to explain. You cant think about the universe in terms of space and time and reality because all of those are attributes of the universe, its kinda like a giant creature that and its mind is just probability and chance. Which is why we even have the ability to make a choice. Of the other universes i have seen I think this is the least entertaining.

Think about it like this, what if time werent constant, reality shifted instead of maintained, what if you could make more than one choice about something?

Where do u go when u enter a black hole? Black holes are a little misunderstood, they're the pimples of the universe, dense collections of matter. Matter is not the primary content of the universe, its actually just super condensed energy as most of you know. Energy is what causes time and time in this universe is not bidirectional. But when you enter a black hole you enter a MASSIVE amount of energy which makes it seem like time has stopped (to an outside observer) but you will basically be killed in a black hole. Say you went into it feet first, you would be stretched because of the difference in 'gravitational' push between your feet and head.

is there something beyond death? if yes, what? Death is just the opposite of life. When you die you'll understand.

is there aliens anywhere? if yes, where? If you're talking about other life forms outside of earth then yes of course. why wouldnt there be? you think you're special or something?

if god is so cool and good why doesnt he help the situation on earth? Because you have to do things for yourself, you dont deserve to exist if you cant even handle existence. all pain and suffering can be eradicated if you were just to change the accepted standards.

was god created? if no, that means he always existed? how can u always have existed? I dont exist.

does the universe always existed too? You only believe in time as you see it. have faith that there is more to it than that.

whats beyond the universe? to you, nothing.
All of your questions are in the context that I am the god from your bible, I am not.

[God v2.0]

oh!.......cool thanks.....

serotonin isn't a filter....its a chemical....it makes you happy....and can be found in brazil nuts ...i think its found in weed as well....along with melotonin which makes you tired....and is also released when you close your eyes.....i read about it the other day....lol

Ok i get the bit about religion....its manmade....but we are man and .........no ill quite while im ahead...

but on a serious note.....im a m interested in the "filter" that you mentioned....if it serotonin then i apologise....but if it was a mistake does anyone know what the name for the filter is?....
I used the term 'filter' in an abstract way. The only reason that you see what you do every day is the way your brain is set up. Serotonin is a neurochemical that is always in your brain. Without it you would lose control over the material world in otherwords die or become extremely sick. Psylocin and Psylocybin replace a small amount of the serotonin in certain areas of your brain (memory for one). So its like the world you live in now is just your default chemical setup but when you modify it with shroomies you start to see and experience stuff that is always there but you couldnt experience without a specific chemical.

[God v2.0]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serotonin Plays a part in sex and eating. What is your purpose? To reproduce. And in order to survive and reproduce you kinda have to eat and drink every once in a while.

[Funkamander]

Who is, in your DIVINE opinion, the greatest band ever?

Who is, in your STILL DIVINE opinion, the worst band ever?

So, like, is it true? Did you really just accidentally cook a white person too long, and made a black one?

Has it been long enough so that we can make 9/11 jokes yet?

If a woman passes out, and you two are alone, we all know it's wrong to hump her. But, is it wrong to feel her up? Not like, beating off while groping her. Just, you know, a good squeeze or two?

How many people have been trampled to death by Meerkats?

What's the deal with Astrology? That shit isn't real, is it? I fuckin' hope not.




Oh, and religion. We all know they're all dumber than a bag of hair. But, which one comes closest to acceptable?

[Az.]

ok cool....and one last question....

did you have to look up any of what you said or did you already know everything? serious please :)

[God v2.0]

ok cool....and one last question....

did you have to look up any of what you said or did you already know everything? serious please :)
Most of it came from my brain, only thing i looked for was the serotonin thing after you asked about it

[Az.]

Most of it came from my brain, only thing i looked for was the serotonin thing after you asked about it

excelent dude! thats pretty good!!

now last question....sorry i have been waiting to talk to you for a while...

Have you been a mamber of this website before? Under a different name?

[GratefulDead4ever]

prolly God v1.0 hes an upgrade

[God v2.0]

Who is, in your DIVINE opinion, the greatest band ever?

Who is, in your STILL DIVINE opinion, the worst band ever?

So, like, is it true? Did you really just accidentally cook a white person too long, and made a black one?

Has it been long enough so that we can make 9/11 jokes yet?

If a woman passes out, and you two are alone, we all know it's wrong to hump her. But, is it wrong to feel her up? Not like, beating off while groping her. Just, you know, a good squeeze or two?

How many people have been trampled to death by Meerkats?

What's the deal with Astrology? That shit isn't real, is it? I fuckin' hope not.




Oh, and religion. We all know they're all dumber than a bag of hair. But, which one comes closest to acceptable?
Best bands recently have been The Beatles, Pink Floyd I also personally love Nirvana.

Worst band ever in my 'opinion' is Journey, follow closely by Alice Cooper (no offence to anyone who likes these but I think they suck pretty bad)

and yes black people were a little over baked, i was playing around with a few people in Africa but got distracted and accidentally left them out in the sun too long. Also originally you were supposed to have a glossy skin that was moist and you would have been able to adhere to walls and climb very easy.


9/11 was funny to start with man. your CIA funded al-Qa'ida terrorists and trained them back in the day. what goes around comes around. also you should check out this: http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-2023320890224991194 makes some 'interesting' points.

If shes passed out and you think shes hot then go for it rape her until you cant feel your cock anymore. you'll end up getting VD though. also Id like to make it known that there is no such thing as evil or good. They're both the same self-defining action. Without evil how do you know what good is? Without good whats evil?

You need to lay OFF the drugs for a little while son. Go get a head x-ray and an MRI because your brains have turned to scrambled eggs. A meerkat is the size of a prairie dog. Not even a decrepit 100 year old lady would succumb to trampling by meerkats

Astrology? Of course its real! Thats the biggest problem you little humans have, you dont understand that everything affects everything. maybe only in the slightest of ways but it still affects you. Whether you're a taurus or a cancer, the position of the universe around you ALWAYS matters. sometimes not as much as you think and sometimes alot more than you can imagine.

Read a book called sirens of titan, by kurt vonnegut. there is a curch of god the utterly indifferent which really intriuged me. id say thats the closest ive come across yet.

[Zinnia]

Maybe it's like being dyslexic and wanting to know if there really is a dog.

[beachguy in thongs]

the biggest problem you little humans have.
And the biggest problem you have is that you needed to learn that wind was from pressure differences, not temperature differences, c'mon, what kind of God are you? If you're gonna talk down to others than you must be talked down to yourself, didn't you learn that, God?

[Caruso329]

Haha! I love this thread!

Dear God 2.0,

Is Jesus the son of God, a prophet, or a poser?
How do you explain his miracles?
Who is the anti-christ?
Will our concept of the world ever end? If so, when, and how?
Can energy be created or destroyed?
Can matter be created or destroyed?
Is reincarnation real or bullshit?
Who is the antichrist?

One last question...

a/s/l?

Signed,
Caruso329

[BizzleLuvin]

god speaks the truth

answer this: where am i going to college???

[VoidLivesOn]

What sort of accident did I lose my cock in?

[God v2.0]

And the biggest problem you have is that you needed to learn that wind was from pressure differences, not temperature differences, c'mon, what kind of God are you? If you're gonna talk down to others than you must be talked down to yourself, didn't you learn that, God?
We're actually both right, pressure differences cause temperature differences and maybe its pressure that creates temp variation and wind. And I'm not talking down to anyone, you're the same as me, same as anyone!

[Garden Knowm]

Hi God,

seems like you have the same problem most people have,
YOU THINK YOU KNOW EVERYTHING..


love & light
knowm

[beachguy in thongs]

Attention v., you don't say wind is hot air going from cold, it's high pressure going to low, or vice versa. It doesn't matter how those pressure centers form. Like 13+13=34 is true, if you explain that the second 13 is, actually, 7 x 3. That is because of the Hadley circulation cell. That's how that figure works.

[God v2.0]

excelent dude! thats pretty good!!

now last question....sorry i have been waiting to talk to you for a while...

Have you been a mamber of this website before? Under a different name?
I have. And you should all know me very well. (And fuck no this isnt tokosan. if he breeds all i have to say is good luck humanity! but i still love you tokosan)


Haha! I love this thread!

Dear God 2.0,

1. Is Jesus the son of God, a prophet, or a poser?
2. How do you explain his miracles?
3. Who is the anti-christ?
4. Will our concept of the world ever end? If so, when, and how?
5. Can energy be created or destroyed?
6. Can matter be created or destroyed?
7. Is reincarnation real or bullshit?
8. Who is the antichrist?

One last question...

a/s/l?

Signed,
Caruso329?
1. Jesus was right on target but was kinda misunderstood. He was a fend for yourself and dont rely on others but at the same time be grateful to people who help you. Also help people who are in need. (For his time I'd say this dude was the smartest human alive).
2. Over exagerations, also the last supper deal, well Jesus (he pronouced it Hey Sus!) was, like i said a smart smart dude. The wafer/bread that he passed around (his body) had some ergot in it (look it up if you dont know what it is, its used to synthesize LSD basically).
3. Jesus
4. Of course your world will end. It will probably be by you. If not you then me. If not me then some other way. Nothing lasts forever in your universe. But dont worry, it will be after you and everyone you will ever know has died. Your own sun will eventually expand to a red giant once its helium fuel supply is exauhsted, then it will get much bigger and encompass the first planet (mercury) and scorch the fuck out of earth when it starts to use its hydrogen fuel. but i bet that earth wont even last that long.
5. It can be aranged to make matter, and then the matter can be 'destroyed' but an equal amount of energy is released. even quantum physics on earth explains that.
6. (above answer includes this one)
7. Your consciousness scatters and the arangement of energy in your brain that you call being alive scatters. but your thoughts memories and everything about you just can still be recovered from the brain. so you can die then techically be brought back to life, and still remember everything but you're still in the same body. the technology will become available once free energy is released.
8. A little stoned are you?

[God v2.0]

Hi God,

seems like you have the same problem most people have,
YOU THINK YOU KNOW EVERYTHING..


love & light
knowm
I do know everything! As soon as you tell me something I will know it therefore you cant prove that you know something i dont know with proving yourself wrong.

[Caruso329]

Actually, no I was completely sober when I wrote that out.. I'm a philosopher by nature. And also have some of my own theories on existance, not beliefs mind you, just theories. My eyes has been opened up so to speak.

[God v2.0]

Question 8 and 3 are the same though, thats what i mean.

[eagle1113]

I'd have to counterpoint v2. What happenned to v1? That other dood that I've obviously wasted my time and anger over?

Religion: the opiate of the masses. So true, isn't it? And a wonderful means of population control if you ask me!

Intellect cannot overcome the universe as it really is, only the stupid people who choose to believe that they are here to serve anyone or anything!

Wasn't there already light in that galaxy so far away?

I say let there be light... for my bowl.

Let it be, man, let it be.

[GratefulDead4ever]

v1. failed and is now the devil v2. is new and improved and for sale at your local walmart

[eagle1113]

now thats funny

[Swizzy89304]

I do know everything! As soon as you tell me something I will know it therefore you cant prove that you know something i dont know with proving yourself wrong.
Answer this - how many grams of cheese are there under my foreskin, and what was the consistency of the turd I dropped yesterday?

[Caruso329]

Haha whoops, I didn't even notice.. maybe I have a subconcious obsession with the anti-christ... And really guys, why are you asking "realistic questions" like how much is this? and when did this happen? and what time did I masturbate today? If you're just trying to prove he/she doesn't know something, you're asking the wrong questions.

By the way, I don't believe you are any type of god at all. Probably just some teenage kid who believes he has reached enlightenment and transcended human existance. So I've come to three possibilities. Either this is a huge joke, which isn't really funny, because some of the stuff actually makes sense to me. You truly are enlightened, but I doubt it, because why would you be spreading your word on an internet forum, when you can spread it with the world through more suitable media. Or you're just delusional, and you probably need some help. Have a good one! :)

[beachguy in thongs]

I do know everything! As soon as you tell me something I will know it therefore you cant prove that you know something i dont know with proving yourself wrong.
What is the amino acid that you're body naturally converts to Melatonin?