View Full Version : What should I do
AcidFreak
11-07-2005, 11:44 PM
A bit of background info...
I'm a teenager, male, 15 years old, 16 in January. I currently live with my mom, brother, and sister. As of the last year, when my dad moved out (definately not the first time that's happened, he's had recurring problems with alcoholism and addiction to hard drugs; he left me and my mom [back when I was an only child] when I was 2, and came back into our lives when I was about 10), my home life has been nothing but shit. I'm treated like a total criminal, outsider, for every little thing that goes wrong, my fault or not. Since my dad's gone, I'm expected to be the "man of the house". I do more work taking care of the house than my mom, brother, and sister put together (my mom doesn't even have a job, and since my dad doesn't live with us I have no idea how we manage to get food on the table or pay for our house), and I'm expected to juggle that with school work. And she wonders why I'm not doing well in school.
I've recently begun SERIOUSLY thinking about any possible alternatives to living at home. It's caused me nothing but severe depression, and I'm sick of it. I feel like if I don't get out of here, this house, this fucking city, I'm going to blow my fucking brains out. I ask that you guys don't take this the wrong way, like I'm trying to glorify myself, I'm just asking for advice. I'm a very smart kid, I have a tested IQ of about 163. I'm also extremely gifted in music. I picked up a guitar when I was about 14, and pretty much haven't put it down since. Music is my passion, and I couldn't live without it. I've been told by everyone that's heard me play that I'm "destined for greatness" (for lack of a better term). I have a lot of friends, and a steady girlfriend, and I wouldn't trade any of those relationships for ANYTHING. I have a bunch of people (my age) I can talk to, they're the reason I haven't seriously hurt myself in the past.
Well, that's probably more background information than you really needed, but my question is this: What should I do? I can't keep living here, I just can't. I want more than this place can offer me, and I can't wait the 2 years MINIMUM to get out of here. What can I do?
Satan666
11-07-2005, 11:51 PM
Not much. Without signed docs from your mom
SensiRide
11-07-2005, 11:57 PM
I was sick of my situation at home and moved out when I was 17 but believe me, its hard living away from home so young. I was so skint, you wouldnt believe it-I lost 2 stone just because I couldnt afford to buy food......I'm not saying don't do it, but just think it through-can you afford rent, bills, food and other expenses-can you continue with yur education when you move, do you have savings?
Try taking up something to take your mind of things a bit, get out the house more.....I hope it all works out whatever you do :thumbsup: I'm doing fine now, I can say I'm a stronger person from learning to cope alone so young. :thumbsup: Good luck! :)
thcbongman
11-08-2005, 12:40 AM
You gotta get your education locked down first. Whether you use it later is all up to you. Being a H.S graduate is hard enough trying to cope in this world. It would've been much easier to stay in school. I regret it everyday of my life that I refused to pay attention in school, and go to the length not to show up, all because I had problems at home.
You sound like a smart, responsible kid. If you want, you could run away from home and face the adversity of the real world, lanquish pain, and gain knowledge of life. You could channel your emotions into music and hopefully become famous while building up to that point, working like a maniac to survive. If you are one of those types that is a fighter, a survivor, and someone who could take a beating from god, hey dude, go for it.
Otherwise stay away from your house as much as possible, make sure your bro and sis are all right, while you focus on school, finding your passions, and seeking happiness.
My gut tells me you are of the lather, you sound like you can handle some adversity.
AcidFreak
11-08-2005, 02:03 AM
I'm definately a survivor, and I'm no stranger to hard times. I'm confident I could make it on my own, mentally. I just don't know what I'd DO. How could I get a job as a 16 year old runaway?
elcheapo
11-08-2005, 02:26 PM
What doesn't kill you can only make you stronger. Life is full of problems.. deal with them. Some of them worse than others.
'Tough times don't last.. tough people do.'
sharpezor
11-08-2005, 02:44 PM
just leave ?
BkSkillz
11-08-2005, 03:59 PM
i gotta tell u bro runnen isnt going to solve anythign right now u have some support coming in from your peers and if i were you i'd focus on the positive and stay away from da negative theres alota fuked up shit dat happens daily out here in this world and at 16 theres no way i could say u'd b ready to indure or even foresee what could b around the bend if u need someone to listen to you there plenty of people out there and even in here willing to listen other then that do what the rest of us did...smoke some pot
pschumach
11-08-2005, 04:14 PM
You're only 16, you should wait at least 2 more years until you're 18 and done with high school. Just stick it out two more years. Not only will it be far easier to live independantly once you're legally an adult, but you will also have the advantage of having a high school diploma, which, now more than ever, is not something you want to miss out on.
Fengzi
11-08-2005, 04:21 PM
I'm definately a survivor, and I'm no stranger to hard times. I'm confident I could make it on my own, mentally. I just don't know what I'd DO. How could I get a job as a 16 year old runaway?
You could always give blow jobs to dirty old men for money. They'd pay even more if you let them fuck you in the ass.
Now, before you just figure I'm some prick making a bad joke or giving you a hard time, this isn't what I'm trying to do. Sadly, this is reality for a lot of teenage runaways. I live in San Francisco and just recently saw a news report that there were over 1000 underage prostitutes who were runaways living on the streets here. You sound way too smart to let this happen to you. So, unless you have a firm plan, don't think about leaving the house yet.
One thing you might consider is stayig with a close friend. I did this for a year when I was 17-18 because my parents moved to another state and I wanted to finish out my high school before moving. I had a part time job and payed a small amount for rent, more symbolic than anything, and helped out with household chores. It wasn't bad.I don't know if its a possibility for you but something you might look into.
Untilmately, if you have to stick it out just hang in there. Two years may seem like a long time but it really isn't when you look at the big picture. In any case I wish you luck.
lemonboy
11-08-2005, 04:28 PM
Yes but depriving oneself of home life and (formal) education does not automatically mean they'll wind up in a dark ally getting a human booster shot from a guy named Molly.
You have to embrace the hard times and accept the road less traveled for what it is before you can start to journey down it. The most important piece of advice I can offer is to not make hasty decisions. Take time to figure out your plan, whatever it ends up being, and stick to it.
Free Tibet, no grapes, and all that.
P.S Research emancipation in your state if you're interested in being declared a legal adult before you turn 18.
Caruso329
11-08-2005, 05:51 PM
Get a part time job, talk to the parents of your best friend (or a really good friend you wouldn't mind living with), and ask if you can move in with them. But wait until you're 16, because I think 15 and below your mom can just call the police on you as a runaway. Don't quote me on that though, it might be 16 and below.
somebody someone
11-08-2005, 09:00 PM
good luck man.. stay strong!!
mellow mood
11-08-2005, 09:07 PM
man you can work at 16 years old easily. heres what i say: first explain ALL this, all how you feel, and all the possible solutions to your mom, as well as your bros and sis. now if nothing chnages, i say u go live in a lil chamber, you work 25 hours/week plus school (if u can handle it), and try to finish your school. pratice a lot guitar, if u can in few month start bosking (playing in the streets for a lil extra money), and then when u finished school u make wut u want.
u can always next summer travel and earn money by working in some fruit picking, like in okanagan valley in BC, canada (i worked there this summer and earned about 12 to 15$ an hour for easy job)
so man travel, finish school, live by yourself, do what u want man. but finish school, if u want to go at college and study in guitar (im studyin in music, guitar right now)
hope itll helps. be strong and never give up! oh and why not ask your friends if they dont wanna live with you and share an appt?
psychopixi
11-08-2005, 09:12 PM
Make sure that your education is your main priority. If this means staying at home for another two years, then do it. It'll be worth it in the end.
If you feel that you could maintain your education after leaving home, well, I don't know what the law is like in America, but in the UK could could get emancipated. You would legally be your own guardian. A friend of mine did that at your age, and social services found him a place to live, he's on housing benefit so he doesn't have to pay rent, and he gets a certain amount of money just for staying in education.
Seriously though, I can appreciate that things at home might seem abso - fucking - lutely dreadful right now, and I've never had to deal with that kind of situation myself. Having said that, and echoing what many other people have said, it's only two years. Don't fuck up the rest of your life over just two years. In the scheme of things it's not that long.
NightProwler
11-08-2005, 09:18 PM
run away. thats probibly bad advice tho
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