PDA

View Full Version : you know you're a stoner when....



Miss Goody Two Shoes
05-01-2005, 10:09 PM
You know you're a stoner when
You sense a strange mystical union of minds whenever you see the number 420

You know you're a stoner when you're a mile from your destination, yet you decide to burn one anyway.

You're really a stoner when you use pot to come down rather than to get high.

You know you're a stoner when you spend 10 minutes looking for your lighter only to find it's in the same hand as the pipe.

You know you're a stoner when you smoke dope before a job interview.

You know you're a stoner when every story begins"....man, this one time i was tripping so hard..."

You know you're a stoner when the beginning of your plan involves two joints, two bonghits, and two bowls

you're definately a stoner when you just had the greatest night of your life after eating 15 grams of cubensis, and while the sun is just coming up, you decide it's best to eat another 15 grams.

--------------------------------------------
if your a teenager
you know you're a stoner when every bottle or tube you see, your mind contemplates how it can be best fashioned into a bong or pipe

check out my new chocolate-milk-carton ball-point-pen bong
uh huh huh
it's chocolatey
-----------------------------------------------

I think that tree was tryin' to tell me somethin'


I KNOW the bird was
-----------------------------------

you know you're a stoner when you just ate two peanut butter & jelly sandwiches, a banana, a twix bar, glass of milk, handful of doritos, and you're STARVING TO DEATH!
---------------------------------
you know you're a stoner when you wake up at 2 am realizing you've passed out on the couch in front of the tv
and on your way to the bedroom you take a few rips from the pipe
only to fall unconscious in bed 10 seconds later
-----------------------------------
you know you're a stoner when your lighter runs out
you go for the other lighter, and it doesn't work either
and you can't find any matches because of last time this happened

let's huddle round the stove, this is important

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
you know the dude is a stoner if somewhere on his body he has a tattoo of the word
OZZY
------------------------------
hey everyone, it's 8:40 at my house
that means we need to get twice as stoned
----------------------
its 2:10
that means we can only get half as stoned this time
------------------------------
you know you're a stoner when the dude sends you a spore print of Astoria Ossip that is so blank and smudged it's useless, but you try to use it anyway.
----------------------------
you know you're a stoner when you're smokin' moldy weed


the mold just makes is better dude!
-------------------------
you know you're a stoner when sometimes you just unconsciously pass the pipe to your dog
then you laugh because its funny
then you're quiet and self conscious because you're mind is slipping
then you laugh again because the dog knows what's going on and wishes he could smoke
then you're quiet again because its crazy that you can read the dogs mind
then you laugh and give old fodge a hug
take another toke


-------------
you know you're a stoner when you finish your bong load, and all the water is gone.

you know you're a stoner when you hide your bong behind something that's clear.

you know you're a stoner when you try to smoke a cashed bowl

StarcommanderX
05-01-2005, 10:35 PM
uh....right. now for my own: *ahem* you know youre a stoner when you begin menstrating at the age of five, and your a male!!!

Looker
05-01-2005, 10:37 PM
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH :eek:

Looker
05-01-2005, 11:09 PM
No this time I was laughing at you, Miss Goody two shoes...

Oh BTW avatar is from a TV show called "Lazy Town"...

My five year old loves that show I think I got her the DVD of it or something

ezjim
05-02-2005, 12:29 AM
that was good thanx

Mojavpa
05-02-2005, 12:56 AM
you know you're an addicted loser when all of the above describes you

StarcommanderX
05-02-2005, 02:04 AM
you know youre a shroomer when you sacrifice a weekend knee-deep in cow poo trying to find shrooms.

mellow mood
05-02-2005, 03:14 AM
u know your a stoner when u just smoked 2 bowls of good hash, than a 2G joint of hash and coke, with beer, than u come back at your home to check whats new at cannabis.com.


hahahahahha peace guys

woneightythree
05-02-2005, 05:47 AM
you know your a stoner when you come home from smoking 2 vaporiser bowls and 3 snaps out of my bong just to see whats on cannabis.com

2600
05-02-2005, 07:42 AM
you know you're an addicted loser when all of the above describes you


(Apr-24-2005, 02:12)

Yeah, I've thought about quitting. But there are too many other things I have to quit first, like watching stupid reality TV shows and spending countless hours downloading porn.


Sorry man, I had to burn you w/that one lol. So catch me in chat some night Mojavpa, after midnight or so houston time (go rox!).

Lurker
05-02-2005, 03:00 PM
hahahaha! nice one miss goody two shoes!!

Loz
05-02-2005, 03:56 PM
This one is soo true hahaha....................

'You know you're a stoner when you spend 10 minutes looking for your lighter only to find it's in the same hand as the pipe'

bigdaddy420
05-03-2005, 04:20 PM
After reading that, I thought of one. You know you're a stoner when you try to light a joint that has already been lit. This has happened to me a couple of times.

Reefer Rogue
05-03-2005, 04:45 PM
You know you're a stoner when you don't know if someone rang the doorbell or you imagined it. lol it's happened to me atleast :rolleyes:

marij 4201605
05-03-2005, 05:19 PM
You know you are a stoner when you are walking into school and you have this really bad ass indepth thought and when you get to the door you can't remember it to write it down (I have a book full of thought that I rememebered but I just can't rememeber the good ones.)

4thpower
05-03-2005, 05:36 PM
This one is soo true hahaha....................

'You know you're a stoner when you spend 10 minutes looking for your lighter only to find it's in the same hand as the pipe'

I agree, that's happened to me more than once.

looseends
05-03-2005, 05:38 PM
you know you're a stoner when you do the true wake-n-bake before the kids wake up.

mellow mood
05-03-2005, 08:50 PM
you know your a stoner when you lose 2 lighters a day. yea man that pisses me off!!

carmzilla
05-03-2005, 09:04 PM
you know you are a stoner when you roll a joint, look for a light and than lose your freshly rolled doob.

: (

richieguy69
05-03-2005, 10:36 PM
You know your a stoner when you don't always have cash, but you've always got a book of papers. :D :D :D (not me ;) )

Hektik
05-04-2005, 02:29 AM
lol amen to all of that.

Ozskyz
05-04-2005, 03:49 AM
You know your a stoner when you find five lost lighters and they all out of gas.

hardon
05-04-2005, 04:07 AM
you know your a stoner when your room/vehicle reeks of a febreze/pot combination

carmzilla
05-04-2005, 07:26 AM
you know you are a stoner when the smell of weed(chronic) makes you salivate.

GHoSToKeR
05-04-2005, 08:45 AM
you know you are a stoner when you roll a joint, look for a light and than lose your freshly rolled doob.

: (
lol

sToNeDpEnGuIn420
05-04-2005, 09:05 AM
You know your a stoner when... You light the joint take a puff pass it but try and pass the lighter too(as if it was a with a pipe)

ok that was way to complicated for how it sounded in my head, god damn it lol im st0ned

KellisJ2003
05-04-2005, 10:49 AM
You know your a stoner when... You light the joint take a puff pass it but try and pass the lighter too(as if it was a with a pipe)

ok that was way to complicated for how it sounded in my head, god damn it lol im st0ned


Yeah dude, I always take a hit of a bowl with my lighter, then try to pass both things to my friend, but they all have lighters. Yet, I still try and pass it because I forget that they all have one. Man, this is confusing. I'm to stoned to type too.

katisse
05-04-2005, 01:08 PM
You know you're a stoner when the ashtrays to your right and the dog is to your left and you thump your ashes on the dog.
You're a stoner when the guy next door asks if you have the morning paper and you hand him a zig-zag.

Just a couple. lol

hoodedclum
05-04-2005, 01:17 PM
You light up a spliff and smoke half the roach before you realise your puffin on cardboard :D

hoodedclum
05-04-2005, 01:48 PM
woops let me try again..


you know your a stoner when you light up a spliff the wrong way round and smoke half the roach before your realise your puffin cardboard.

dunno why i bothered it was lame anyway lol.

4thpower
05-04-2005, 03:51 PM
I gotcha, hoodedclum. I've nearly done it myself.

I always try to pass off the lighter to my friends, too... eventually we all end up with different lighters than we came w/.