Funniest stoner moment

[medical420mama]

So we are always talking so seriously on here i thought maybe i would start a not so serious thread. What is your funniest stoner moment...we all have had one wether you want to admit it or not.

So i was having a bad day not to long ago and got a little more stoned then normal and i was talking with a friend loading a bowl for my water pipe finished loading the bowl (stem) and instead of me putting it in the pipe i hold the bowl up to my lips and attempt to light it ouch burnt my lip..lol after i realized what i had done and we were done laughing our asses off i go to put the stemin the pipe and take a hit....normally when you hit a water pipe you hear the water bubbling well i didnt hear that....fuck forgot the water....finally i was able to smoke some more but then figured i was already stoned enough and put the pipe down.

It maybe not be the funniest story i have but it is the most recent and the one i can remember right now. Whats yours?
:rastasmoke:

[LetsMedicate78]

ok so I didn't even smoke until I was 19 and one of the first few times I smoked, already high as a kite, I took the small waterpipe from my friend which had been cherried, and put my lips up to the cherried bowl and it burned the sh t out of me. I have no clue why i did that, just a dumb reaction by a newborn smoker. We did have a dam good laugh tho.

[Washedout]

After the babsitter arrived I went to my bed rm. to finish getting ready to go to meet my friends for a night out.So my 4 yr old son followed me and picked up 2 jays I had in the bath rm. so I take them away and place them behnd my ears.As I began to leave the sitter told me that she saw the jays and where they were.Needless to say I begged her not to tell anyone. So she said, "nevermind I know now where to get some for free".I moved out of the county the next monh b/c she was the most expensive sitter I have ever had.
:(

[firestartersydd]

There were some tweakers getting busted next door to me and the DEA was all over the place.....so my happy ass rolls a joint and goes and smokes it on the front porch.....(not the smartest, I know, but damn I thought it was funny)......the best part about it is that I was face to face with an agent, joint lit in my mouth and NO ONE said a damn word......Guess they dont worry about the peaceful pot-head hippies when there is meth next door.

[Anonymouse]

Mine was going into 7/11 after partaking a large amount, getting my stuff and going out of the store and getting inside and trying to start the wrong car.

It was the same color/shape, but pretty embarrassing.

[RAINHAZE]

Years ago I smoked some killer thai stick smuggled out of vietnam. While I was driving south on I-4 in Florida at 2 in the am, I happened to look over at the northbound lanes and there was a car traveling the same direction we were! I was so stoned I wasnt sure if it was us or the other car that was in the wrong lanes! We immediatly pulled over and after some intence haggling we finally figured we were in the right lanes after all.
:toilet_claw:

[coolslayer]

I wonder if most people here have pulled a bag out of their pocket by mistake while paying for something at a convenience store........

:wtf:

[SkyHighStar]

i only started smoking regularly about 8 months ago, but i already have a ton of stoner stories :P i think the best happened about 3 weeks ago when i went over to a friends house and we got stoned. after a few hours, our desire to sit there and do nothing was overwhelmed by our desire for some seriously tasty treats, so we went out and got some and took a ride through this one rural community a few miles away from where i live. it was around 7am maybe a little later (we pulled an all nighter), and the sun was shining. it really was just the perfect morning and there we are just cruising along, blasting our music. life couldnt have been better, right?

wrong! and heres why: as i was driving down this one road which was surrounded by farmland, i come up on a group of cows just hanging out on the side of the road, eating some grass. they had to have been no more than 8 ft away from my car and it was at that moment that i realized that my ONLY course of action was to turn the music down and pull up slowly next to them and lay on my horn. the result did not disappoint. they were just enjoying the morning and suddenly their entire worlds just came crashing down on them. you could see the fear written across their faces. they took off for their lives. one booked it behind some barn, and this other one tried to be the hero of the bunch and run along side my car, but then i guess he thought better of it cuz he took off around to the other side of the barn too. i was already gone and i could still see them running in one of my mirrors. i kinda feel bad about it now, but nobody got hurt and at the time, i had to pull over cuz i was laughing so hard.

sorry to be so detailed with my story, but i just wanted to paint the exact picture of what it was like to be there. hope this brings some people a few laughs :P

[medical420mama]

Ha Ha best laugh i had all day...thanks!!!! Keep em coming



i only started smoking regularly about 8 months ago, but i already have a ton of stoner stories :P i think the best happened about 3 weeks ago when i went over to a friends house and we got stoned. after a few hours, our desire to sit there and do nothing was overwhelmed by our desire for some seriously tasty treats, so we went out and got some and took a ride through this one rural community a few miles away from where i live. it was around 7am maybe a little later (we pulled an all nighter), and the sun was shining. it really was just the perfect morning and there we are just cruising along, blasting our music. life couldnt have been better, right?

wrong! and heres why: as i was driving down this one road which was surrounded by farmland, i come up on a group of cows just hanging out on the side of the road, eating some grass. they had to have been no more than 8 ft away from my car and it was at that moment that i realized that my ONLY course of action was to turn the music down and pull up slowly next to them and lay on my horn. the result did not disappoint. they were just enjoying the morning and suddenly their entire worlds just came crashing down on them. you could see the fear written across their faces. they took off for their lives. one booked it behind some barn, and this other one tried to be the hero of the bunch and run along side my car, but then i guess he thought better of it cuz he took off around to the other side of the barn too. i was already gone and i could still see them running in one of my mirrors. i kinda feel bad about it now, but nobody got hurt and at the time, i had to pull over cuz i was laughing so hard.

sorry to be so detailed with my story, but i just wanted to paint the exact picture of what it was like to be there. hope this brings some people a few laughs :P

[firestartersydd]

I wonder if most people here have pulled a bag out of their pocket by mistake while paying for something at a convenience store........

:wtf:

Ive never dropped a bag, but I dropped a loaded "bullet" pipe one day. I was hanging around with some guys from work and as I reached in my pocket for a cigarette, my pipe fell out. I almost had a freakin heart attack until one of the guys asked if I needed anything to fill the pipe with.....I ended up smokin with all of em!!!

[FLYINGHIGH2]

Ive never dropped a bag, but I dropped a loaded "bullet" pipe one day. I was hanging around with some guys from work and as I reached in my pocket for a cigarette, my pipe fell out. I almost had a freakin heart attack until one of the guys asked if I needed anything to fill the pipe with.....I ended up smokin with all of em!!!

I enjoy stories with happy endings. :thumbsup:

[LetsMedicate78]

my buddy and I had a really bright idea a long time ago....after he finished his business at the bank drive thru lane we circled back around through another lane, got the cannister you send stuff to them in, filled it with reefer smoke and sent it to them. Needless to say we didn't stick around to see their reaction.
:thumbsup:

[firestartersydd]

my buddy and I had a really bright idea a long time ago....after he finished his business at the bank drive thru lane we circled back around through another lane, got the cannister you send stuff to them in, filled it with reefer smoke and sent it to them. Needless to say we didn't stick around to see their reaction.
:thumbsup:

Rofl.....thats awesome.

[Washedout]

It was Friday and I just got paid so i bought an oz and brought it home.So I went to get ready to take off for a couple of days so I spilt the oz and gave my live in Manny half.I get a call from him on Saturday night and he used up his half and asked me where my stash was I told him in my closet and only to take a 1/4 so I'd have something.On Sunday I returned home and was beat from the drive so I told him to get the rest of my stash he told me it was gone I told him I was p!$$#d and he told me after he got my son to school he'd get 2 oz's.I walked in the kitchen opened up the freezer and got out this freezer wrapped item marked spinach and he said why are you cooking spinach? His eyes looked like they were going to pop out of his head.It was an oz and why did I have it wrapped like it was and in the freezer? My son and his Manny can't stand spinach.

[medical420mama]

Thats awsome i am so going to do that nobody in my family eats spinach so that is brilliant.


It was Friday and I just got paid so i bought an oz and brought it home.So I went to get ready to take off for a couple of days so I spilt the oz and gave my live in Manny half.I get a call from him on Saturday night and he used up his half and asked me where my stash was I told him in my closet and only to take a 1/4 so I'd have something.On Sunday I returned home and was beat from the drive so I told him to get the rest of my stash he told me it was gone I told him I was p!$$#d and he told me after he got my son to school he'd get 2 oz's.I walked in the kitchen opened up the freezer and got out this freezer wrapped item marked spinach and he said why are you cooking spinach? His eyes looked like they were going to pop out of his head.It was an oz and why did I have it wrapped like it was and in the freezer? My son and his Manny can't stand spinach.

[medical420mama]

I have never dropped a bag when i was paying but when i was working at a hobby store and this group of guy game in and was buying paints and wood...they were making a box (they were very excited about thats why i remeber what they were making). But one guy pulls out a had full of stuff out of his poket...his sack falls out...i laugh tell them i dont care, he hands me a 20 all folded up and i open it and there is a freshly rolled joint in it. I gave it back and they ended up giving it to me for being so cool about the whole thing. I so got stoned on my lunch break....best day of work in a long while.



I wonder if most people here have pulled a bag out of their pocket by mistake while paying for something at a convenience store........

:wtf:

[coolslayer]

I didn't drop the bag in the convenience store,I just pulled it out in my hand while digging in my pocket for money.The clerk was looking right at me when I did it,and just shook his head.I paid and made a hasty exit......

:)

[medical420mama]

I would have done the same thing....:thumbsup:


I didn't drop the bag in the convenience store,I just pulled it out in my hand while digging in my pocket for money.The clerk was looking right at me when I did it,and just shook his head.I paid and made a hasty exit......

:)

[chance942]

Wow I couldn't even carry a "bag" in my pocket. Smell it through the bag my pants,car,toolbox etc.

My funniest now would be blowing a lung load right in the face of a park ranger and not getting busted.He shouldn't have startled me like that!

[medical420mama]

That has hppened to me but normally it was my mom...i never understood how she walked so quietly(shes a big lady) and was able to get me everytime.

[QUOTE=chance942;

My funniest now would be blowing a lung load right in the face of a park ranger and not getting busted.He shouldn't have startled me like that![/QUOTE]

[chance942]

I could see that happening Mama,haha. My Mom is open to it but I'd feel more awkward if my moms caught me. I think the rangers were just wanting a puff,Caballo lake,nobody around...never know.

Now I reeked repeatedly in front of my step mom,oh well!!!!!!!!! One time I came in from my first real bake and simply asked her if Maryjane was another name for Marijuana. OMG after that there were government propaganda pamphlets on the couch,tv,etc. I'd still burn a bowl right in her face today.

This isn't funny but how many peeps have sent a bag through the washer and still smoked it? I have. I waited all afternoon for a 1/2,puffed and 2 hours later I was like where is my bag???? FMTT

[FoTwenny]

I once walked into an A&W with half a lid sticking out of my shirt pocket.

[khyberkitsune]

I got so stoned one day while camping I made the silliest verbal dyslexic mistake.

I meant to tell everyone to watch out for fleas and ticks. Instead I said "Watch out for Teas and Flicks!"

[khyberkitsune]

I wonder if most people here have pulled a bag out of their pocket by mistake while paying for something at a convenience store........

:wtf:

At *LEAST* five times in the past year I've done that here in Cali. They just laugh and ask "Is it any good?"

[coolslayer]

Wow I couldn't even carry a "bag" in my pocket. Smell it through the bag my pants,car,toolbox etc.

My funniest now would be blowing a lung load right in the face of a park ranger and not getting busted.He shouldn't have startled me like that!

Oh yeah,I forgot about burping a saved up hit into my Government teachers face in HS.

[chance942]

Ha that's funny Slayer. Was the teacher cool or did you get busted?

I knew a guy that got caught on camera @ the HS burning a fatty and they just suspended him.

[coolslayer]

Ha that's funny Slayer. Was the teacher cool or did you get busted?

I knew a guy that got caught on camera @ the HS burning a fatty and they just suspended him.


He pretended not to notice,verdict: semi-cool.

[chance942]

Oh dag my German teacher walked right up behind me while I was rolling one and she was like ahhh what is that???? She took my BS line of "it's a tobacco substitute". I was lucky that she was an open minded woman and also that I had clean undies for class.

[coolslayer]

My Geometry teacher was a jerk,so we used to sit in the back of the class rolling "joints' with pencil shavings.After he took us to the office a couple of times and got embarrassed,he quit messing with us,so we started rolling real joints and he just told us to "quit messing with those pencil shavings" if he noticed.

[chance942]

Haha thanks Slayer! That made me laugh:D. That's awesome

[coolslayer]

Happy to oblige.

[RAINHAZE]

A few years back when I was wild and totally spontaneous, a bunch of us decided to go camping.
We loaded up the truck and headed for a cool campground near Osteen Florida that the
driver reccomended as a great place.
Soon after we found the dirt road off the main highway,
we found a place to pull over and toke up. We smoked a couple of doobs, and some hash under glass
and then took off down the dirt road higher than fuck.
After an hour or so of driving down what seemed like an endless sea of pine tree's and
palmettos in the middle of the night, we soon realized that we were lost bigger than shit.
Not only were we lost, but we were also getting dangerously low on gas.
As we were driving around furiously trying to find our camping spot, we rounded a curve
and all of a sudden we ran into this big ass mound in the middle of the road. It was about 4 feet tall,
and a good 10 feet across. When we hit it, the truck went up in the air and landed on this thing
and we got stuck on it. Thats when the most god awful smell hit us! Whoa! this thing smelled like
rotting, shit and guts! We were gagging and pukin trying to get the windows up, but the smell was even
coming thru the floor!
After what seemed like forever, we managed to get free of the mound and get the hell out of there!
We didnt have a clue as to what that was, only that it smelled like the pits of hell!
We never did find the campground, so we decided to park in the middle of the dirt road
(because there were palmettos everywhere else.) and camp there for the night.
Later when we decided to leave and head home, we ran out of gas. So we hoofed it back down the
dirt road to find a gas station, and every now and then we would see a catfish head.
hmm. The farther we walked, the more catfish heads we would see.
Eventually we found the "mound" we ran into previously and it was the biggest pile of
rotting catfish heads I ever seen in my life!
Seems that back then Florida Swamp river restaurants would dump their catfish heads out in
the woods but this time they dumped it in the middle of the road...and we found it.

[coolslayer]

Man,I bet that sucked.Hope it wasn't a complete buzzkill.

[RAINHAZE]

Man,I bet that sucked.Hope it wasn't a complete buzzkill.

On the contrary, We all laughed about how much the odds were of anyone running into 3 or 4 tons of fish heads in the middle of the road were. I still laugh about it. ... even after 32 years. :jointsmile:

[chance942]

Damn Haze that is crazy. I don't even wanna know how bad that smelled but I got an idea!

Hey Slayer do you remember Bob talking about the cacti? I was walking out of wal mart today and there they were!! This store insists on selling only censored music but they are selling freakin mescaline.

I think that is funny but sad too since I can't buy Buds legal outright.

[coolslayer]

I haven't bought music in years.....can't see the point of buying something that is free online.For the liner notes? No thanks.
I especially wouldn't buy anything that was censored,I don't believe in censorship.

[khyberkitsune]

"can't see the point of buying something that is free online"

This is exactly what killed my mother's band, and my own as well. So much for getting paid for our hard work and dedication.

[firestartersydd]

I honestly have to disagree. I have been in a few bands in my time and Ive dealt with the issue of piracy. But in my opinion, if you are going to get into something like the music industry, its only expected. There is always gonna be someone who can find a way to get music or video without paying for it. I download all the time and if it wasnt for downloading, I wouldnt be the musician I am because I honestly cant afford to go out and buy every CD I want. No disrespect, but its honestly people like Cool and myself who support the music industry the most. I may download and get the album for free.....but Ill damn sure pay a ticket or buy a shirt at a live show. If it wasnt for downloading, I wouldnt know who half the bands I listen to are.

[khyberkitsune]

"I download all the time and if it wasnt for downloading, I wouldnt be the musician I am because I honestly cant afford to go out and buy every CD I want."

Broadcast Radio, Internet Radio, Pandora, there are millions of ways to listen and still ensure your favorites get their dues. Lack of money in an age of free streaming services is a poor excuse, IMHO. Oh, we have musical college, you know. Get some real music theory behind your current knowledge and you'll be even better.

"I may download and get the album for free.....but Ill damn sure pay a ticket or buy a shirt at a live show. If it wasnt for downloading, I wouldnt know who half the bands I listen to are."

Again, in an age of information at your fingertips, that is a poor excuse. You can find most lyrics simply by typing in the first five words you can recall, and from that you find out the band (or sometimes the original author if it's a cover song.) Oh, and usually after a song is done playing on the radio, the DJ announces the song artist, and sometimes even the track title before they move onto the next set.

"I may download and get the album for free."

The market is driven by album sales, not concerts and shirt sales, as the highest profit margin comes directly from album sales (.10c per pressed master copy sold for $15, factor in shipping, etc...) No album sales = no tours/concerts due to lack of funding money. This is par for the music industry, signed OR independent.

[coolslayer]

"can't see the point of buying something that is free online"

This is exactly what killed my mother's band, and my own as well. So much for getting paid for our hard work and dedication.

File a lawsuit,that's how a lot of Americans get rich.

[coolslayer]

I honestly have to disagree. I have been in a few bands in my time and Ive dealt with the issue of piracy. But in my opinion, if you are going to get into something like the music industry, its only expected. There is always gonna be someone who can find a way to get music or video without paying for it. I download all the time and if it wasnt for downloading, I wouldnt be the musician I am because I honestly cant afford to go out and buy every CD I want. No disrespect, but its honestly people like Cool and myself who support the music industry the most. I may download and get the album for free.....but Ill damn sure pay a ticket or buy a shirt at a live show. If it wasnt for downloading, I wouldnt know who half the bands I listen to are.

Very true. You think that I get Slayer tickets and shirts for free?

[coolslayer]

"I download all the time and if it wasnt for downloading, I wouldnt be the musician I am because I honestly cant afford to go out and buy every CD I want."

Broadcast Radio, Internet Radio, Pandora, there are millions of ways to listen and still ensure your favorites get their dues. Lack of money in an age of free streaming services is a poor excuse, IMHO. Oh, we have musical college, you know. Get some real music theory behind your current knowledge and you'll be even better.

"I may download and get the album for free.....but Ill damn sure pay a ticket or buy a shirt at a live show. If it wasnt for downloading, I wouldnt know who half the bands I listen to are."

Again, in an age of information at your fingertips, that is a poor excuse. You can find most lyrics simply by typing in the first five words you can recall, and from that you find out the band (or sometimes the original author if it's a cover song.) Oh, and usually after a song is done playing on the radio, the DJ announces the song artist, and sometimes even the track title before they move onto the next set.

"I may download and get the album for free."

The market is driven by album sales, not concerts and shirt sales, as the highest profit margin comes directly from album sales (.10c per pressed master copy sold for $15, factor in shipping, etc...) No album sales = no tours/concerts due to lack of funding money. This is par for the music industry, signed OR independent.

If money was your goal, you probably should have considered a different career. Most musicians I know(and I know quite a few) play for the love of playing music. The odds of a homegrown musician making it big are extremely slim. If you are happy playing live music,people will see that and spread the word. If you're only in it for money, that will be obvious to audiences also.
Good luck with that.

[coolslayer]

Meanwhile........


back to "Funniest stoner moments"

[medical420mama]

Meanwhile........


back to "Funniest stoner moments"


I was just about to say that myself. This was supossed to be a nice no fight or arguement post lets try to keep it that way. Happy tokin!!!:jointsmile:

[chance942]

I love Nuevo Mexico. It's so cool to be so far from california

[firestartersydd]

Sorry, bad day. Ill play nice now, lol.