best substitution methed there is (IMHO)

[skydivr]

i have had anywhere from 12 to 30 employment drug tests a year for over 13 years both pre employ and random even a few post injury tests. i have always used the same thing and never had ANY kind of negative result. i have passed tests where there was someone standing just behind me watching. i don't know how well it would work if they actually needed to see you urinate, but hell this is substitution anyway right. here is my method: on the internet at urinator.com (make sure you spell it with an "o" not an "e" (some weird porn site)) they sell two things. the first is a device called the urinator. this is basically a small medical type pouch (imagine a small iv pouch) with a built in thermostatic control that operates a credit card thin heating pad that is powered by two 9 volt batteries. and the whole thing folds up in a pouch about the size and shape of a velcro wallet. i said thermostatically controlled. that means when the liquid comes out of it it 98.6 degrees +/- .1 degree.

the other thing they sell at this web site is something called dr. johns pee. this is a concentrated synthetic urine substitute that when mixed with water is chemically identical to human urine. (at least that is what the website claims)

when i have to take a pre employment screen, i don't know what kind of form the test might take so i prepare for the worst. i wrap an ace bandage around my stomachand tuck the urinator under it just above my beltline. the urinator has about a six inch tube coming from it which i tuck into my pants. this is only really necesary if i am going to be watched. if i know i wont be watched i just tuck the thing in my boot and off to work i go.

now heres the kicker. they sell the urinator for 150 dolars(worth its weight in gold to me)and they sell the urine for ten dollars if you have purchased a urinator(ever). if you haven't bought one then they charge 20 dollars (still a very reasonable price). the urine in concentrate form has a shelf life of a year(unmixed), and the only thing that damages it is uv light. temperature is not an issue. once mixed it needs to be used within 12 hours or frozen. my solution: unless i think i am going to be watched i do not mix it. keep the tiny vial of concentrate in my pocket and the device in my boot. i'll pee anytime you want me too.

now wait i know what some of you are thinking, maybe it wasn't a dot test,
how close could it really be to real urine, or some other such nonsense. let me reassure you. i have taken nondot tests, dot tests, 7panel tests, 10 panel tests, even had to take a test after a crushing injury and they tested for other things like blood in my urine. i have NEVER FAILED EVEN ONE TEST!!!

i usually use a urinator for about three years before i sell it (in perfect working condition) to some other poor desperate schmoe, for the same 150 i paid for it, turn right around purchase another one and a fresh supply of urine, pay the 15 dollars to have it overnighted and i'm back in business the next day.

[skydivr]

website didn't post
thats urinator(dot)com

[Deige]

Seems like a lot of money and work when you can accomplish the same thing by using Quick Fix synthetic urine. I can purchase it online for 25$, it comes with a hand warmer(8 hours of warmth), a temperature strip, and can be reheated as many times as you want. The only downside to it, is you can't use it when your being observed.

This all being said... How the hell were you tested 12-30 times a year and completely prepared every single time comfortably? Ive never heard of someone tested to this extent. Were you job jumping or on probation? This all sounds a bit far fetched to me.

[webdox]

Indeed, it's an expensive way of accomplishing something that you can do on the cheap. You can do the same thing with just a jocked bottle of fake pee as Deige suggested for non observed tests.

It almost sounds like a sales pitch for the urinator especially considering the whole: having to raise your shirt above the waist and drop your pants so as to expose your genitals and allow the observer to verify the absence of any cheating devices thing for some directly observed tests.

[nottyvixen]

So my question is, did anyone actually go to the site and look at the product? If there's even a remote possiblity that the test might be observed that little white tube is not going to work. I'm glad that its worked for some of you and it's an inexpensive alternative but I've said it before and I'll say it again, use quality products when your life is on the line. There are ample companies that sell realistic prosthetic urinating devices that really work and are reasonably priced. I have experience with a few and will post a review soon. :thumbsup:

[Deige]

So my question is, did anyone actually go to the site and look at the product? If there's even a remote possiblity that the test might be observed that little white tube is not going to work. I'm glad that its worked for some of you and it's an inexpensive alternative but I've said it before and I'll say it again, use quality products when your life is on the line. There are ample companies that sell realistic prosthetic urinating devices that really work and are reasonably priced. I have experience with a few and will post a review soon. :thumbsup:

I viewed the product online and came up with the same conclusion, given the fact that the observer was looking directly at your genitals. If he or she was standing behind you then its possible to use and not get caught. The Whizzinator is a similar product that has a prosthetic penis instead of a tube. This product would work better than the tube, but when given a closer look you can tell its fake. I personally wouldn't use either or recommend them to anyone who is going to observed. Most generally the people who are being observed are on probation. If your willing to risk your freedom for a few hours of fun, then maybe your priories need a revaluation.

[Burnt Toast]

If a person is facing an observed DOT test, they will be checking for artificial delivery systems and containers used for substitution. See post #5 in this thread: http://boards.cannabis.com/drug-testing/165397-observed-d-o-t-test-soon.html

Devices like the whizzinator, the Wedge, and the Urinator are on the way out.

[skydivr]

just so everyone knows no it wasn't a sales pitch, and you're all right, this is a substitution method. and as such just about any of the other delivery methods will most likely be just as effective. the main point of my original post was not necesarily about the device itself, but more for the very inexpensive source of clean urine. so many people out there worry about whether this source or that source will pass the test. others get their urine from someone that is clean(you hope). personally i have seen people buy other peoples urine (a risk i am not willing to take for the simple reason that that person may have taken a prescription pain killer or some such and just forgot to tell you about it.), i've even seen somebody use a homemade concoction of water, salt, mountain dew(of all things) and a little bit of coffee thrown in for good measure. he didn't pass his test. as for the quantity of drug screens i have taken over the years: yes somewhat of a job jumper, but not the way you might think. i'm an industrial construction worker, which means i go where the job is. usually when the job is complete there is a lay-off, which means find another job or draw unemployment. also because it is industrial work the clients usually require mandatory minimum randoms. needless to say my previous statement was completely true though i will admit that i only had to take as many as 30 one year, most years average around 12. the one true benefit of the urinator over other delivery devices is the fact that the temp is never more than 1/10 of a degree more or less than 98.6 degrees. and two 9 volt batteries will maintain the proper temp for 6 hours (one extra set of batteries and your ready for the whole day).

so to be clear: i am not trying to sell anything, just figured that with all the opinions out there, some legitimate and effective, others downright fantasy and luck, i would share with the rest of you my highly effective method

as far as cost goes, yeah you can go down to the head shop or wherever and get what you need, but if anyone has found a guaranteed clean source of urine for less than ten dollars please let me know.