I love her

[DaBudhaStank]

I came to a realization last night. I've been having intense feelings for a girl the past few weeks, and she claims to feel the same, though she feels she cant be in a relationship or anything like that. We're both in college and I walked her back to her place at about 2 in the morning, and had a long talk about how we felt and where this is going (which is nowhere). When I got back to my place it hit me like a ton of bricks. I had been having dreams about her (specifically about losing her) and can't get her out of my head. I told her that I love her, even though I know she doesn't feel the same and that it'll likely make things very different between us, but I just didn't care. I've never even kissed this girl and I can feel it. I know love is something that you can't pick apart, its something that you just feel, and I dont know that I've ever felt it this acutely. I'm not quite sure of the point of this post, but I guess I confused her, haha. In the end I don't regret any of it; if I hadn't said it I'd have exploded. All I can do is wonder and hope that her feelings will change for the better.

[friendowl]

you are walking on thin ice looking for a fish that dosnt exist
you should change the word love to lust
love has nothing to do with what you feel

[Innominate]

I suggest you analyze what you love about this girl. If she offers you something that you cannot find in other women, give her some time and try again later.

Be careful what you tell her. Open your mind for her just as much as she does for you.

[SecondNut]

Dude, I have been in your place. Don't listen to anyone telling you it's not love, you know in your heart what's real. The hard part is when they don't feel it back... you hold out hope, "maybe if we stay friends one day she'll see me for who I am", thinking of some way to prove to her... etc, etc

It is the worst feeling in the world, and at the same time it's the best, because you are totally consumed with this overwhelming feeling towards someone.

Been there more times than I care to admit. Here's my advice. Don't try to stay friends, it will just hurt too much. You're going to hurt anyway, may as well get it over with as quickly as possible. I tried the "staying friends and hoping" thing, twice. Once for over a year. I was freaking MISERABLE the entire time. Then come to find out, the whole time I was pining over this girl, a different girl was pining over me! Go figure!

Anyway, good luck dude. You have my sincere sympathies.

[crudemood]

its better to have loved than to never loved at all.
but don't waste all your time on the one you think you love when they won't return it, it will all be in vain! move on if you must.

but i wish you the best of luck with her!

[geonagual]

Here is that "L" word again

[DaBudhaStank]

yeah, that "L" word again. every single day i go from loving her dearly to hating her because i think she's leading me on or playing me for a fool. i just dont know whats going on anymore.

[Chaotixxx]

Sounds more like lust than love. Your relationship with her is completely platonic and you cant stand the thought of losing her. You dont have her in the first place..

Girls want to win a guys heart. Once they do, their mission is over. I can say with near certainty that your relationship with this girl will never turn sexual. If you want to hear about her dating and fucking other guys, keep hanging out with her. If not, dont talk to her anymore. If she really loves you shell find you :thumbsup: Dont hold your breath though.


P.S. NEVER profess your love to a chick until she told you first. Unless you like being single.

[DaBudhaStank]

see, this is why i dont listen to people like you chaotixxx. its not lust. i dont get this bent out of shape if i wanna sleep with someone, i could go beat off and there, problem solved i'm not horny any more. i dont CARE if it turns sexual, i want to know what the hell is going on in her head. i want to know how she feels and how i can get through to her. and no, if i love someone i'm gonna tell them. i dont believe in a set way of doing things for relationships, because its bullshit.

[Chaotixxx]

Now you sound like a stalker. That sure wins em over ;)

I had your problems in 9th grade. I learned better.

[Charles U Farley]

Hey Budha,
I give you credit for courage,its really scary and risky opening your heart,allowing your self to be vulnerable.I think its easy for others to say your thinking with your lower extremity and not your heart,or dont tell someone you love them first.Most of these folks are scared of being vulnerable and I dont blame them,because youve just given someone the power now if they dont feel the same way to manipulate and use you,its scary as hell.You know whats in your heart,but dont let it over rule your common sense.If you think she is leading you on and that there will probably never be a relationship,well... trust your instincts.All the power,passion,love in a relationship needs to be equally distributed and not all one side.I truly hope things work out for you,but it sounds like she isnt or wont be reciprocal in her feelings for you,good luck my friend,take care,be well,and most of all be safe.

[geonagual]

Well put Charles...+rep to you buddy

[birdgirl73]

Moderating

Chaotixxx and DaBudhaStank, you both crossed over the line in some posts above, which I've now deleted. That needs to stop. I will hand out more infractions and do more deletions if I need to, but you two really need to steer clear of each other. Chaotixx, your assignment is to quit responding in this post altogether. You can't seem to do that without being offensive.

[StickyfingahZ]

Dang Bro,hard to not think about something you love.There is such a thing as too much of anything.Try taking a step back and try looking at it from her point of view.She did say she feels the same.
Just go with your gut feelings bro,but dont push too hard,Dont worry about kissing her,the main thing is you guys are cool and have a little spark.......just dont blow that spark too hard,you just might blow it out.....

[DaBudhaStank]

Yes Ma'am birdgirl, it's just hard when all someone wants to do is start trouble. Anywho, thanks all for your advice but I've officially ended it, because NO girl is worth getting this bent out of shape.

[beachguy in thongs]

Well, you gave her five days of consideration!

[Reefer Rogue]

I can empathize with you in the way that i still feel that i'm in love with my ex, even though she dumped me and doesn't want me anymore. It sucks thinking about someone so much, even dreaming about them, when they don't feel the same way you do. I think it would be best by moving on and meeting new women.

[geonagual]

Well, you gave her five days of consideration!


5 days is long enough. LOL

[StickyfingahZ]

Yeah,5 days is long,you cant just forget about someone that you have loved so much.Best of luck for ya bro.