I feel like a horrible person...im so bummed

[rebgirl420]

So lately ive been kinda obsessed about losing weight and working out. But im doing it for the wrong reasons. Lately all I can think about is John's friends. I kinda have a thing for one of them and I am in no way going to act on it BUT I want them, especially the one to think im sexy. That is, alot hotter than his girlfriend. I have no idea why im acting like this but its all I can think about. Im even going to join the freaking gym next week so I can loose weight and firm up. I just want his friends to think im hot. I know this is shady and horrible but I feel this need to be better than the other girls there. Even if I wont act on it. Ugh.

What do you girls and guys think? Am I going insane? Is this bad motivatation? I think it is but I think its going to work. This may just be the thing that keeps me on the right track. To lose more weight and improve myself.

And please, no mean comments. Its not what I need right now. I think im going manic (Im bipolar) and my mind keeps on racing about this. Nothing is helping. And I can't tell John so I just needed someone to rant to.

[acrca]

Well working out is never a bad idea so i say go for it! Your probly fine the way you are so either way its all good :)

[L Rag]

Yeah bro.. Thats all good! Don't stress it, I've been in the same position (not the working out bit, the having a thing for my girls mates bit), it pretty much blows over really quickly, and you get to see that you'd much rather stay with your girl/boy in the long run. Sweet! :)

[Veratyr Star]

What girl doesn't want attention ya know?

I'm sure it's natural to feel that way. Don't worry about it.


(probably gonna get moved to sexuality forums soon)

[rebgirl420]

well id never actually act on it but its still running through my head all damn day. Its like a drug...a bad drug. The high that I get just thinking about it is, well it doesnt really have a word for it.

[Veratyr Star]

Who doesn't like drugs... i mean honestly

[Hawkeye]

I guess anything that motivates someone to workout is good, but you should explore your relationship with John a little harder. If you have a thing for one of his friends, how can you really be committed to him? My wife and I have been married for over 13 years now and even though she has some very hot friends, I can honestly say I've never had a "thing" for any of them. Looks are a very small part of a relationship, and if there is more to your "thing" than looks, then you seriously have some thinking to do. This is just my opinion and it is not intended to be a judgment of you. I'm just offering you my two cents.

[L Rag]

Pretty much everyone I know haha.

[rebgirl420]

Theres nothing wrong with my relationship with John. Ive never been happier in my life and I cant wait until we get married. Ive never cheated on him and I wouldnt start now. I think my "thing" for his friend is harmless and theres nothing wrong with thinking about other people than your signifigant other. As long as you don't act on it.

And I assure you, looks arent important to me. Its the inside of John that I care about. He's why im still alive and breathing. But I love how you would assume that im shallow and that since I have a slight crush im obviously not committed..nice

[Hawkeye]

You obviously did not read my post very clearly...and that tells me all I need to know. Good luck!

[rebgirl420]

no need to be rude :thumbsup:

[L Rag]

Blaze up and then think about it?

[rebgirl420]

I have been high and thinking about it. Ive actually been getting quite stoned every day since Labor Day. I had quit for a week before and it just so happened when we went over John's friends house his friend (not the one I like) smoked me up and all of us, Johns 2 friends and his friend who I likes girlfriend was there, we all played madden and guitar hero. It was a blast actually.

[L Rag]

Mint! Whats guitar hero like? Yeah man, its awesome going for a week without bud (I think i've done it..Once since I started? Haha), you just get an intense as buzz with your low tolerance aye..Primo

[Hawkeye]

I was not the one being rude my dear. You posted asking for what people's thoughts were on this subject, but when I offered mine to you, you judged them as wrong.

[rebgirl420]

Yeah its actually really fun! Im on medium but John's friend had all the levels beat and all these songs downloaded and everything unlocked so when everyone played it was super awsome. Everyone was drinking there except for John and I. And I was high. So that prooves its actually pretty easy haha.

[Mr. Bubbles]

You strike me as an attention seeker, Reb. Working out is all fine, no problem there. The reasons and motivation behind it don't seem to well placed, however. How would you feel if John were trying to look good for other women? How would you feel if he were trying to get your friends into him? Just doesn't seem right to me.

[ScaryMissMary]

Im all for working out but you are doing it for the wrong reasons, babe.

Also, how would you feel is you found out a girl your acquiantences with is secretly trying to get John attracted to her? Im sure it would bug the shit out of you, hell it would bug any woman. Now you know that YOU would never do anything, how do you know that guy won't? Why would you want to put that poor girl in that position? Im not bashing you, reb I just want to give some perspective.

[rebgirl420]

^ very true, see John knows I like him and he kinda jokes with me about it. He doesn't seem to mind much. he knows I wouldn't act on it.

But yeah I think im gonna just push it into the corners of my mind and try not to think about it, ya know. maybe the feelings will go away on their own if I just keep myself busy.

Oh well guys and gals. Thanks for the help. I think I have my resolution now :)

[WeedyBoyWonder]

I think you're just the average female. Get what you want, then figure you want something different, or more, or both.
I'm sure you will figure out what to do, as you said it's not like you're going to do anything. If you actually want this guy more than your own boyfriend, then IMO I would say give your boyfriend a break and tell him. I'd HATE to be with someone who wanted someone else, it's emotional cheating.

[rebgirl420]

But thast the thing, i dont really want Him per say. I like the idea of it. B/c its risky. But again, id never, ever do it. Hell, I wouldn't even hug him goodbye. I couldn't even really make eye contact with him anyway.

Im perfectly content with John and John only. For the rest of my life. Its just a fantasy I suppose. Nothing more.

[Reefer Rogue]

John's friends probably already think you're hot anyway...

[RhinoGrowUK]

hawkeye al bump ya rep up son

[Hawkeye]

hawkeye al bump ya rep up son

Forgive me for being a newb, but what does that mean?

[snicklefritz1825]

:thumbsup::jointsmile:Your little green bar under your state flag i'll rep you to.

[LIP]

John's friends probably already think you're hot anyway...

Too right - i certainly do!

[angry nomad]

I guess you already have decided, but I want to put my two cents in, because what I am saying is different. Me and my wife have an open relationship. Not sexually, but mentally. She said she doesn't even care if I have a crush on a girl. I was a little shocked. She said, it's perfectly natural and I know you aren't going to cheat on me. We tell each other everything, literally, and I think it's great.

My wife did have a little crush on/(was attracted to) a guy she works with, and she told me about it. I was a little upset, but then I realized it wasn't that big of a deal, because sexual attraction is just animal instinct. And, at least she was being honest with me. I also know she will never cheat on me. I check girls out in front of her all the time, and she doesn't care, because she knows I don't do anything about it. I also tell her when girls at work flirt with me. One time one of my coworkers got drunk and kissed me on the lips, but it wasn't my fault. My wife was a little miffed at her, but forgot about it in a couple days.

So, my point is, I don't think it's a big deal to be attracted to John's friends. I think a lot of people just don't want to be honest and admit they are sometimes attracted to people other than their current lover.

[FreeVenice]

ok your not married to this john cat, and eperiances pass by to fast to act like your 40 with kids. You should seriously discuss this with your man and explain to him that these are thing that will always be part of relationships. You let them get in the way now, it will be alot harder later. i'm sure your in a good relationship but did you really dream about meeting the perfect man and settling down before your even done with 25% of you life?

I'm not saying go crazy, but sometimes cravings can turn to resentment and create tention in situations that could of been resolved without problems.

You only get one day when you 21, the next day your 21 and a day. if you get what I mean.

[WeedyBoyWonder]

But thast the thing, i dont really want Him per say. I like the idea of it. B/c its risky. But again, id never, ever do it. Hell, I wouldn't even hug him goodbye. I couldn't even really make eye contact with him anyway.

Im perfectly content with John and John only. For the rest of my life. Its just a fantasy I suppose. Nothing more.

I know absolutely fuck all about this kind of thing, maybe try some roll play with John, see if that satisfies your need for excitement and thrills.
Good luck

[Hawkeye]

:thumbsup::jointsmile:Your little green bar under your state flag i'll rep you to.

So it is a good thing? Well thanks to both of you. Woo hoo, I got rep! How does one give rep? Do you need to be a mod or something?

[JMRinFLA]

HMMMMMMMM. I think what's in order here is a threesome. Yes, yes, I'm quite sure of it now. A threesome is clearly what's needed.

[Reefer Rogue]

So it is a good thing? Well thanks to both of you. Woo hoo, I got rep! How does one give rep? Do you need to be a mod or something?

Click the silver scales in the top right of someone's post to rep them, either positively or negatively.

[Hawkeye]

Click the silver scales in the top right of someone's post to rep them, either positively or negatively.

So being that there are no scales in the top right of anyone's posts, I guess I am not allowed to rep anyone. :( Maybe when I grow up! :smokin:

[stinkyattic]

There will be absolutely NO begging for rep. That is not what the system is for.

[Reefer Rogue]

there

[imitator]

That has to be the most complex way to point out an object in a picture I have seen.

WRU arrows and circles? =(

[PlantBoxer]

I think John was the first person you have told about your feelings. I keep nothing from my lady, as whats in my thought towards a lady. Hell, she has let me know a few times that a certain lady made her wet!! It's all cool as long as your talking to each other first and foremost. IMHO

[JMRinFLA]

There will be absolutely NO begging for rep. That is not what the system is for.

Sorry. wasn't aware of that particular rule. Thanks to those that contributed.

[Hardcore Newbie]

That has to be the most complex way to point out an object in a picture I have seen.

WRU arrows and circles? =(Hahaha I was thinking the same thing. I know where the scales are and I couldn't find them for a sec in that pic

[Hawkeye]

there

I appreciate your image sir, but I do not have that. I looked after your first post and I do not have any scales on any posts but my own.

I can understand though how you could think I wouldn't know what "top right of someone's post" meant, but I do have a few working brain cells left. lol

Maybe someone can explain why I do not have those scales.

[Hardcore Newbie]

I appreciate your image sir, but I do not have that. I looked after your first post and I do not have any scales on any posts but my own.

I can understand though how you could think I wouldn't know what "top right corner" meant, but I do have a few working brain cells left. lol

Maybe someone can explain why I do not have those scales.Because you're new.

http://boards.cannabis.com/feedback-suggestions/109162-our-reputation-system-faq.html

[Hawkeye]

Because you're new.

http://boards.cannabis.com/feedback-suggestions/109162-our-reputation-system-faq.html

Which is what I figured. I'm glad someone realized that I am just new, not stupid. lol

[imitator]

Which is what I figured. I'm glad someone realized that I am just new, not stupid. lol

I assume everyone is equally intelligent until they prove otherwise to me.

Sadly, sometimes people do that before I even know who they are. They are the people who make baby jesus cry.

Welcome to the boards though! :thumbsup:

[Reefer Rogue]

That has to be the most complex way to point out an object in a picture I have seen.

WRU arrows and circles? =(

My cpu is broken...

[imitator]

My cpu is broken...

Broken? How so?

[thcbongman]

When you lose a bit of weight, you feel sexy, you want to show yourself off. You simply want acknowledgment of your sexiness.

I don't see anything wrong with that, trying to show how hot you are to others, and you see particular challenges of people you want acknowledgment from. But you should remember to do this for yourself, you want to look in the mirror everyday and be damn I'm sexy. You want people to think, you are sexy.

I think your thoughts are only natural, but remember to not cross that line. Look but not touch.

But reb, promise me you'll never turn into one of those extremely buffed up girls. Part of your sexiness is from the softness of your look. Remember that!

[rebgirl420]

Thanks everyone! Im so glad this didn't turn into some thread where everyone is calling me a bad person. It seems like you all know what i'm talking about.

And no, we don't want a three some but yes John and I have role played about his friend. Weird? Maybe, Hot? VERY. Luckily he called me today and he is over his friends house and he was kidding me about it. I think all is good in my world.

I'll look, but no touchy.

Thanks everyone!!!!

[Blitzed]

Reb, from all the guys I have talked to, they want a girl who is not skin and bones, no one wants to feel like they are gonna break their ladies hips in the heat of the moment. And from what Ive seen of your pics you are not over weight at all! Not to mention you are already extremely attractive. Im sure his friend already thinks your good looking, if not he is most likely fucked in the head. But I defiantly dont think you need to obsess over losing weight. And you shouldnt feel like a horrible person either.

[rebgirl420]

Aww thanks hun, I appreciate that. I think its just that I wasn't always thin and considered hot. I used to be quite chubby and had short black hair and was gothic. I think that my mind still thinks I look that way even though I don't. Is that crazy? Probably. Oh well.

[Blitzed]

Oh its alright, who doesnt worry about their appearance just a lil bit in this new materialistic millennium. Everyone wants to look good, and they are a damn liar if they say they dont.

[rebgirl420]

You get rep for being a completely cool guy haha

[Zannies]

rebbb youll get over it. we have similiar minds you know heh. i do that too, i obsess over things but they go away when you dont think about it. it will go away trust me

[Reefer Rogue]

Broken? How so?

The screen shakes up and down uncontrollably and i have to freeze it with right click and scroll with page up and down because i can't use my mouse button to scroll. It is awful and there's nothing i can do about it, my virus protections never detect anything and i had it 'fixed' but it didn't fix it. That's why in paint i can't draw a circle =/

Sorry i didn't know about you not being able to see the scales because you were new, i haven't been new for a long time.

[Hawkeye]

Sorry i didn't know about you not being able to see the scales because you were new, i haven't been new for a long time.

No apology needed my friend. Since there are a lot of people these days who choose to be lazy and ignorant, I understand how that assumption could be made. No harm done, and I still appreciate your help.

[BuddyX]

well i think you look good by looking at ur piks..

[Weedhound]

Rebgirl,

I did NOT read all three pages of this thread so my info may be completely useless or a better thought......done already but here is what I think.

It's perfectly normal to have fantasies...any kinds....no laws......the rules are indeed in the acting upon them.

Try to get together with John and find some new things to experience....anything new that you guys have not done together.....it'll help refocus you both on each other.

There is 0 WRONG with trying to look good or sexy or whatever....unless it's taken to an unhealthy level. You are a very pretty woman. Take my word for it.....you already look WAY good. :)

[rebgirl420]

Thanks hun. Your making me smile.

I think thats the problem. John and I do and have done just about everything when it comes to sex haha. Weve roll played, talked dirty, lingerie, naughty outfits, toys, porn, outside sex, public sex, weve been there and done that. I guess thats what I get for wanting to try everything. Ugh.

[Weedhound]

When I say experiences RG, I'm not talking about sex. I'm talking about DOING things....together. things....like friends do. Pick something that you and he have never done....(whatever...rock climbing, sailing on a lake, etc) and do it together. It'll REALLY make you both smile....and each time you do something like that it strengthens your relationship. That's really what relationships are about.....experiencing things together. ;)

[MadSativa]

Sup guys been busy but I saw the thread and had to add that your boe sounds cool reb and all the friends invovled, I dont see a problem with anything here, guys look at other guys all the time and think can I take him and if their is ever any doubt we find and prod his weaknesses, and prepare or better ones self. You can not usualy raise the bar by your self, it is better to hang in a group of people who hold the same values, and respect and act as you usualy would. This is why most hang togeather, "birds of a feather flock togeather". I cant even kick it with people that dont keep in mind that everything is a test and everything is all about learning and not conforming to someone eleses fake ass, sheep lead life. I have had prblems with this kind of behavior in the past however, suchas friends girls freinds acting on it and three somes braking relationsships, also I have had girl friends want my friends and ask if they could and my answer either yes or no was the wrong ansewer to them. Just stay in front of the game reb cause sex and a beutiful young blond have ways of starting shit storms, guys are cool till the heat is relentless.

and to all my pepps here what up I might not get to all the threads cause I have little time now but I will be looking for u to say what up and stuff, just like reb

[ganjzilla]

nah i dont feel u that u are in the wrong here...ive always enjoyed it when my friends envy me for the girlfriend in which i have...so thats all that is going on here...and from what i see in the pics of u im sure they already do...so dont worry about it so much...and if u have no intentions to act on these feelings there is nothing u should feel bad about