OH CRAP!

[dark0ne]

Oh CRAP! I got a drug test like tomarrow. They wanted me today but i told them i couldn't make it. My problem is i smoke ALOT and i'm kinda large. what would be the best corse of action, 1. try and flush my system with tea, or cran juice, and asprin. or try for some sort of gnc bought magic juice. i also have no money, i might be able to spend about 20$ on the juice, i just don't know how mutch it is or where to find sutch things.

[FakeBoobsRule]

Who is the test for?

[smokedoja]

what kind of a drug test is it?
-dip strips or a urinalysis (sent away to a lab)?
-are you being watched by someone while you piss?

*if its a dip stick test, you can buy one of those "cover-up" drinks, not the "flushing" type of drinks, theres no way anyone could flush their system if they smoke the day before. ive used those before and the work only for dipstick tests, if you try that shit with a urinalysis, crazy ass shit will come up in the report and they'll know for sure...

*if you're not being watched while you piss, have a buddy who is clean piss in a small "sterile" plastic container or something you can fit in your pocket without anyone noticing. put it up to the heat vents before you go in to get it nice n warm, wear a hoody or something to keep your hands wrapped around the container. you get the point.

ive had many a piss tests, and these methods are tried and true.
i never got caught.
peace

[geonagual]

I think I know only one answer to these questions....

[FakeBoobsRule]

UGH, Smokedoja, some of your advice is good but it is mostly inaccurate and horrible.



*if its a dip stick test, you can buy one of those "cover-up" drinks, not the "flushing" type of drinks, theres no way anyone could flush their system if they smoke the day before. ive used those before and the work only for dipstick tests, if you try that shit with a urinalysis, crazy ass shit will come up in the report and they'll know for sure...

None of that there is right. Most commercial drinks work by dilution and sometimes they add a lot of fiber too. They don't cover up, they don't flush. Labs don't test your urine to see if you drank one of these drinks except for dilution. They test for dilution by testing specific gravity and creatinine clearance.

Now, your info on subbing is quit sketchy. You don't get to bring things into the bathroom in your pockets of the big front pocket of a hoodie. A proper collector will ask you to empty your pockets. Next you don't want it kind of warm, you want it in between 90-100 degrees. You didn't even say how much urine he should get from his buddy.

Please stop with the bad advice in the drug testing forum. Just direct them to where they can find the answers instead of giving shotty advice when people's lives or jobs or freedom is at stake.

[dark0ne]

It's for a job. I went for the interview like 4 days ago. They said it wouldn't be for another 2 weeks, so they could do the background check. The place is a walk in clinic, i realy don't know so i'll plan for the worst, urinalysis. No one will be watching me, but i'm not about to ask random people if i could have some pee. all my freinds are into some sort of drug, so i can't ask them. what i'm going to do is start drinking water, and tea like crazy. Cranjuice, and i do have vitomins on hand too.


On the brighter side. i thought i was going to miss a party friday night. now if i piss tomarrow am, i can go party that night.

[smokedoja]

None of that there is right. Most commercial drinks work by dilution and sometimes they add a lot of fiber too. They don't cover up, they don't flush. Labs don't test your urine to see if you drank one of these drinks except for dilution. They test for dilution by testing specific gravity and creatinine clearance.

Now, your info on subbing is quit sketchy. You don't get to bring things into the bathroom in your pockets of the big front pocket of a hoodie. A proper collector will ask you to empty your pockets. Next you don't want it kind of warm, you want it in between 90-100 degrees. You didn't even say how much urine he should get from his buddy.

Please stop with the bad advice in the drug testing forum. Just direct them to where they can find the answers instead of giving shotty advice when people's lives or jobs or freedom is at stake.

goddam i was just tellin him what worked for me, ive been through madddd years of probation with all kinds of piss testing methods..
i passed allllll of my tests!!
that has to count for something right!!?!?!??

[FakeBoobsRule]

What is your height and weight, physical activity level, and smoking history (how often, how many times, how much quantity)? Before you even answer this I am going to say your best bet is substitution. You can't flush or clean your body out with all that stuff you are doing. If you have head shops look for Quick Fix which is around $35. I know you said you are broke but you will make that back in your first paycheck. You can also get it from a clean donor. I know you said that was hard to find but you can use male or female, young or old.

Smokedoja, let me guess your PO used instant tests. The OP is going to be taking a lab based test. There are different methods to pass those two different tests. Also, you may have passed but you passed without understanding how in the blue hell you passed. Obviously you have never subbed for a lab based test so just tell them to read the sub sticky instead of giving horrible advice.

[smokedoja]

i had instant and lab tests... twice a week

[the_camel]

but whatever dude im done with this thread

In the Uk we would call that; Chatting shit/ Backing down.


Just wondering, do alot of places in the US piss test?
Personally i have never had one, Had a blood test, but that was for reasons other than drugs ;) :p

If i got asked for a piss test, i would simply reply with:

"Do you know how high i am?, Do i really look like the kinda guy that will pass a piss test?"


There ain't many places in the UK that piss test, the only thing we have to do is Criminal Record Disclosure Checks...
Just aslong as your not a drunk/pedo/violent then its normally reet!!

Peace.

[dark0ne]

i got the test pushed back to monday, i'm still gonna party, just not smoke, or roll. I'll be the security Now i got 4 days to pass this test, witch is still not alot of time, but it's better then 24 hours.


I'm 6-7 about 280-mabey 300lbs. i'm not realy fat but i do have some flab i'm just a big dude. It's been a while since i got mesured and weighed.

Alot of the warehouse jobs, and driving jobs arround here piss test. places like walmart, target.....ect piss test aswell.

The funny thing is i drove taxi for 3 years and they NEVER piss tested me, and i had to get a background check and a licence at the police station before i could get into a cab..... but no piss test?

[swany64]

The piss test thing for drivers now I think is mandatory for working for any big corporation. It is basically so the corporation can cover their asses if one of their drivers were high or drunk while driving on the job. It's lame stuff but I guess in some ways it makes sense.

Just make sure if you dilute that you find a way to get your piss yellow. If it is clear white and has no odor then it is an automatic fail in a lot of places. There is a vitamin you can take that will make it yellow.. the odor thing you can't do much about. Good luck bro.. I'm still waiting on my results (and I was 3 weeks clean).

[FakeBoobsRule]

Just make sure if you dilute that you find a way to get your piss yellow. If it is clear white and has no odor then it is an automatic fail in a lot of places. There is a vitamin you can take that will make it yellow.. the odor thing you can't do much about. Good luck bro.. I'm still waiting on my results (and I was 3 weeks clean).

All of that is pretty much wrong. The only smell they can fail you for is if it smells of bleach or other strong chemical that shouldn't be there and it still has to go through validity testing. Color is not one of the validity tests unless you give them black, green, blue, purple, or red urine etc. It can be clear as bottled water and pass validity testing or yellow as the sun and fail validity testing. Do you really think they go around smelling the urine and then if they failed you because "it didn't smell uriney enough" that would hold up?