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View Full Version : If your S/O went to jail, would you stay with them?



BabyFacedAbortion
08-06-2007, 09:43 PM
If your boyfriend or girlfriend was to get locked up and you've been dating for a long time, would you stay with them or end it?

If they were only going away for a few months?

or a year+?

imitator
08-06-2007, 09:52 PM
Depends entirely on what they got locked up for.

My gf has said time and time again she would leave my ass if she found me doing hard drugs, and if I got arrested for pot, she would never bail me out, and that I better hope I dont get put away for any amount of time, because she is not waiting for anyone in jail.

Personally, for me, it would depend on the "friendly" visiting rule. I still havent had the chance to check off the "have sex with a female inmate who is in jail/prison" line on my things to do list, so I might just for that.

birdgirl73
08-06-2007, 10:27 PM
Yeah, I agree. Depends on what he was going in for, assuming it was a boyfriend. Also depends on the quality of the relationship and my commitment level before the sentencing, too.

I'm assuming your guy got a sentence after that court proceeding you were debating going to watch. You're young, BFA. And your boyfriend, although I know you say you love him, has a mighty perverse way of showing he loves others, particularly you. Think hard about that before you decide to rule out your other options while he's gone. You could be out there fishing for all the other nicer, less addicted, less manipulative, less up-and-down fish in the sea, you know?

stripedseed
08-06-2007, 10:37 PM
I would as I have been there done and the person didn't stick by me. Right now I write women in prison that I don't know and while some are real users some are pretty nice people that let their emotions get the better of them.

Stripedseed

blazed_babe
08-06-2007, 10:38 PM
depends on how long you've been dating, how old you are, what he was going in for, and the level of commitment. if you're about to get engaged or seriously discussing marriage (not just "oh i love you so much let's get married one day" but really discussing it as in "let's take the next step and really make this happen"), then waiting a few months would be a-ok, maybe even waiting a year or more.

but it also depends on the severity of what he's going in for...if it's just a minor thing, maybe it's ok, but something a little more serious? do you want to be with someone like that? if you stay with someone, especially if it's a year+, then you could seriously be committing yourself to something and then find out during that time period that it's not what you want. and then you'd have to tell him...is that really fair to him??? not really, in my opinion.

i agree with birdgirl, you are young, bfa, so seriously think about this. don't commit yourself to something that you're going to regret after he's been in for a few months

Spoken Word
08-07-2007, 01:49 AM
it depends on a lot of things like others have pointed out but......
Honestly, no. I'll write them every week or month and I'd pick them up the day they get out with fresh clothes and invite them to eat, but I've been in that situation and in the end....it's not good for either person.

420_24/7
08-07-2007, 03:03 AM
off topic but stripedseed i saw your avatar and started doing that

Blindman0v0
08-07-2007, 05:32 AM
I'd drop that bitch like a used rubber.lol
After I found out where she hid her stash of course.lol

GraziLovesMary
08-07-2007, 01:56 PM
Well... if there was a girl who managed to interest me so much that I allowed myself to open up to her and date her, I have a feeling I would end up falling quite in love with her, as I have a problem with doing that. The next girl I fall in love with (I hope) wont have any sort of hardcore drug problem, so if she were sent to jail it would most likely be a situation that enraged me extremely. Most likely I would say fuck the wait and just break her out, then dip with her to Canada or Mexico. Or Jamaica... mmmmmm... Or fuggit I could just bounce over to Europe, I know it pretty well.

higher4hockey
08-07-2007, 02:02 PM
it would depend A. on what she did, and B. how significant she was.

stinkyattic
08-07-2007, 02:02 PM
TOTALLY depends how they ended up in the can to begin with.
Cultivation? Definitely.
Violent crime, b&e, sexual assault? Fuck no, I'd ditch that scumball like yesterday's dirty panties.

napolitana869
08-07-2007, 02:16 PM
I'm going to have to go with the masses and say it depends why they're there, as well as how much they mean to me. At this point in my life I'm living with the guy I'm going to marry. We've seriously discussed it, but we're not engaged yet. If he was locked up for pot or some other victim less crime I could see myself waiting for a year. I cant say that I would wait any longer than that though at this point in my life

GraziLovesMary
08-07-2007, 02:17 PM
TOTALLY depends how they ended up in the can to begin with.
Cultivation? Definitely.
Violent crime, b&e, sexual assault? Fuck no, I'd ditch that scumball like yesterday's dirty panties.

What a waste.

Washing machines are so much more economical than just buying a brand new pair of panties every day.

Storm Crow
08-07-2007, 03:32 PM
Been there, survived that. Married 40 years. -Granny:hippy:

thoughtwriter
08-07-2007, 04:40 PM
i've also been there. i was dating a guy who went for 'possession w/intentions to distribue'....i helped bail him out...but he went back for over a year. We broke up before he went back for a year b/c of his excessive hard drug use. I think i stood by him b/c of our friendship, not b/c our relationship.

x-Lollypopcicle-x
08-07-2007, 04:56 PM
My boyfriend is due in court on friday but no matter how long he gets i will still stay with him coz i luv him & weve bin 2getha 4 years....

The.Severed.Angel
08-07-2007, 10:14 PM
For me, it doesn't matter what he did, it's his reasons for doing it. If I can accept his reasons, then maybe we could stand a chance, I mean, if you were locked up wouldn't you want someone to be there and support you?

c of green
08-07-2007, 11:20 PM
did 5 years and she stuck so yeah,if she went i'd stay

stripedseed
08-07-2007, 11:30 PM
off topic but stripedseed i saw your avatar and started doing that

Thanks I do it a lot myself. :)

Good to see people would stick by their mate.

Of course sex crimes are a no no and even I would be gone.

Stripedseed

420Cat
08-07-2007, 11:41 PM
If my girlfriend went to jail for:

Doing something horrible to me like, oh I don't know, cutting off my penis, then I would move on.

Killing or assaulting someone she was having an affair with, I'd bail.

Molesting little kids, I'd scram.

Doing hard drugs, I'd leave her, junkies and crackheads aren't worth my time.

Drinking & Driving, I'd stay as long as she hadn't killed or seriously hurt someone.

Killing someone, nope, but if it was self defense, maybe...depends on the circumstances.

Anything to do with 420, nah.

What else is there?