silly things you say when answering the phone

[weedmaster]

what do you say when you answer the phone? on my house phone i useally answer "battersea dogs home can i help you", or "this is pizza hut can i help you". and when i answer my cellphone i say "this is the good looking helpline, goodlooking speaking" what stupid things do you say when answering your phone.

[WeeDIndeeD420]

SPEAKKKKK

[slipknotpsycho]

"~yourcity~ rape clinic, you rape 'em we scrape 'em"

[REEFERDREAMZ]

:jointsmile::jointsmile: Weedmaster, I usually leave my message on their machine.. For Example.. Theirs says " leave a message"... I will say hello you have reached the ______ residence, were unable to answer the phone, leave a message well call ya back .....LOL make them think they called me. Alot of the time though, I just say "TAG" ..lol

LATA TATA !!

:smokebong::smokebong: REEFERDREAMZ AKA JOURNEY :smokebong::smokebong:

[Its a Plant]

"Smello" always makes me smile haha. ~

[xxxhazexxx]

hello saucey suzzies saurna:thumbsup:

[Divadish]

Hello Wakefield baths....deep end lol

[LIP]

Joe's Crematorium - You kill 'em, we grill 'em. How can i help?

Most of the time i just answer without saying anything. Then they dont know weather im there or not.

[surreys princess]

if i am in a rush or a bad mood or something, i will answer "deme", spanish for pretty much speak...

and if my phone is ringing a lot, i say "dominos, can i help you"...

morning lip...hows it goin?

morning haze xxx...

[Psycho4Bud]

Heaven, God Speaking.....:D

Have a good one!:jointsmile:

[Psycho4Bud]

Sorry, wrong number. :jointsmile:

Thou shalt not bear false numbers onto thee.......

Have a good one!:jointsmile:

[Nightcrewman]

God I feel subnormal in this thread I usually just say Hello!

NCM (feeling like he's missing out on something)

[Psycho4Bud]

Nooooo! Not the cage!

Hey, I gavith thee a breakith.........it was the cage or the fires of damnation!;)

Have a good one!:angelsmiley:

[VaporDaddy]

Kitchen!

[Psycho4Bud]

Meh... alright...

But just remember, I have some fellas up there keeping an eye on your sheep.

Go down, Moses,
Way down in Egypt's Land.
Tell ol' Pharoah,
Let my people go. :D

Have a good one!:jointsmile:

[fasterspider]

Ray's abortion clinic. You rape em, we scrape em. No phetus will beat us. It's your dime

[fasterspider]

City morgue, you kill em, we chill em, you stab em, we slab em.

[telisrex]

North-East gate,can i help you?

[lil josh]

yh ill see you later mate, then put the phone down. lol confuses all my stoner m8s

[Purple Banana]

I take mine along the lines of the great Simpsons-

If I'm feeling in a Mr. Burns mood, it's "Ahoy, hoy!"
Homer Simpson, it's "Yelloow"
Or if I'm feelin' fine, it's "Moe's Tavern"

I'm such a dork...

Telemarketers are fun to play with, but I reserve them from verbal abuse, as my friend is one, so I guess I can sympathize.

[birdgirl73]

If it's someone I know calling, I'll sometimes answer "West Memphis Dairy Queen, he'p ya?" in a real strong Southern accent. Don't ask me why. Most of the time I just say "Hello."

My son says "Digame," for "Talk to me" in Spanish. My husband now simply answers with his first and last name if it's his on-call line or just "Hello" if it's the home phone, thank goodness. When he was younger and sillier, he used to use that line "County morgue, you stab 'em we slab 'em" line.

[Semaj]

if im feeling silly ill answer "ello barney's bakery, which crumb do you want to speak to?"
usually good for a small laugh or two

[yoda]

i rarely ever say dumb shit when i pick up, and if i do, it's too random to remember what to tell you all. the other night, a friend called and i just said "mushy mushy" though.

[sickstrings84]

Tim's mortuary and Meat-Market.

[MagicalHerb]

lmfao
"pleasure palace"

[Skink]

Yellow...

[BlAzInIt4:20]

i say ello hoos this? ello can u hear mi.. elloo.. hahahaha everyone always goes oh sorry got the wrong number lol

[BabyFacedAbortion]

Holllaa?
Yizzert?
Whaaaaazzzzzzzzuppp?
Hi?

I called my ex once and he picked up and said "(town)'s sperm bank, how may I help you?"

That made me laugh.

[STIMPY21]

Them: helo is Dan brown there? (PAUSE) No I'm sorry you just missed him. My dog ate him! and then hang up
STIMPY21

[Runaway Jim]

*asian voice* Herro thees ise Ho Wah asian coozeene how may i herp roo?

[TX Girl]

Usually a smile infused hello will do
but I've been known to bust out w the occasional Elmer Fudd impersonation

[Blowboy]

[city] police department, what's your emergency?

pretty basic, but it makes ppl confused and laugh

[sefi]

WTF do you want?!, or Wa??, it depends on the mood im in.

[zeebo phillips]

People like to call me while I'm doing 3 things at once, so usually its "WHAT!" or "WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT NOW?"

Or I use the line from that commericial a loooong time ago
"Mocka mocka beetsite!"
I think thats what it is...oh well, I still say it. :thumbsup:

[BUZz UK]

they don't let me have a telephone in my cell, i log onto this message board telepathicaly...

[hemodilator]

i just say moshi moshi because im japanese lol

[AsianStoner420]

i just say moshi moshi because im japanese lol

lol same here

[Reefer Rogue]

Yo.

[marihuano 4 lif3]

I say "yellow this is Roy D. Mercer who the hell is this calling my cellular phone" in a country voice.

[STIMPY21]

a new one-me: helo, no He can't come to the phone right now, he has a bad case of monkey-finger. them: how bad is it? me: it must be pretty bad, it's moved all the way up to his ass. CLICK
STIMPY21

[MadSativa]

Answer:
"Mikes morge you stab em we slab em this is Mike speaking"

Answer:
"Mr. sexxys pizza, our special to today is sexaronie"

Answer:
"this is Dave"............."Daves not here man"

Answer: moeshi, moeshi

Answer: Allo

Answer: "shots fired officer down, *gun shots*"

and my fav.
Answer:
"Speak"

[cannabis campbell]

lmfao
"pleasure palace"


All right, pussy, pussy, pussy! Come on in pussy lovers! Here at the Titty Twister we're slashing pussy in half! Give us an offer on our vast selection of pussy, this is a pussy blow out! All right, we got white pussy, black pussy, Spanish pussy, yellow pussy, we got hot pussy, cold pussy, we got wet pussy, we got [sniffs]....smelly pussy, we got hairy pussy, bloody pussy, we got snappin' pussy, we got silk pussy, velvet pussy, Naugahyde pussy, we even got horse pussy, dog pussy, chicken pussy! Come on, you want pussy, come on in, pussy lovers! If we don't got it, you don't want it! Come on in, pussy lovers!

Attention pussy shoppers! Take advantage of our penny pussy sale! If you buy one piece of pussy at the regular price, you get another piece of pussy of equal or lesser value for only a penny! Try and beat pussy for a penny! If you can find cheaper pussy anywhere else, fuck it!

Haha it made me think of that for some reason anyway I dont really say something stupid unless its a call on my mobile and I know who the person is, then Ill just answer with completely random shit.

[ChronicJoint]

abortion clinic
you rape em we scrape em
no fetus can beat us
my name is cletus
how many i help you?

[Wintersweet]

"where you at?"
and "what are you wearing?"
or, you know, "hello."

[ghosty]

Sometimes if it's someone I know I'll pick up and say thank you for calling the "(my real name) society for better living. For information on donating to the society press any button now otherwise please stay on the line and a representative will speak to you shortly"

[Blitzed]

911, please state your emergancy, or.. Hello. But if Im in a bad mood what, or yeah work just fine.

[ganjzilla]

yeah i normally dont say things like taht when i answer my fone, but i do say hellerr like madea does on them madeas family movies

[rebgirl420]

"Hey im casing the house right now, no ones home. Oh and dont call the cops."

[Nice Dreamz]

What do you want, then fuck you to their answer. no matter what it is. then i laugh and find out whats really goin on

[MadSativa]

Whats your favorite scary movie?

[Paulkishi]

I say what. Not that creative.

[Pipe Dreams]

"County morgue, you stab 'em we slab 'em" line.

HA, thats usually what I say :D

[RedLocks]

usually If it is a number I don't recognize I answer the phone by saying "WHAT!?"

[connector_robot]

Sometimes I aswer the phone with, "Hello, this is the Jackon residence, Blanket speaking."

[4twentE]

8 Ball's pool room. 9 Ball speaking....