virginity

[jdub61]

maybe i just don't understand because i'm a guy... but is it just me or is the entire concept of "virginity" incredibly overblown and overrated?
seriously, what's the big deal? why does society place so much emphasis on it? once you get over the hump (pun NOT intended :() then there's no big deal, and you're in the clear, and you're free...

like, my girlfriend's ma told her right before she went off to college that once she gave up her virginity to a guy that she would have nothing left to give. wtf is this? apparently girls don't have brains and personalities and lives, they're just capsules containing a one-time dose of virginity...

what do some of the ladies think about the issue?
also, do you regret losing it when you did or not? because i feel like most people don't...

[OniEhtRedrum781]

I lost it at 15

[birdgirl73]

I was 17. Don't regret it. I waited till I found someone I felt I was in love with and committed to. He and subsequently my husband are the only two partners I've had.

For some people, especially women, it's a fairly big deal. Sex itself is a big deal to me. That is, I think intimacy needs to mean something and be backed by love, ideally. Not everyone's that way. But for women who feel virginity is an important gift to be bestowed on someone, I think it's about keeping lovemaking private and special and only sharing that level of intimacy with a very special person rather than simply being about the first-time experience itself. Frankly, there's a lot to be said for having some experience in that area and being fully "broken in"!

[gildoiski]

I was 17. Don't regret it. I waited till I found someone I felt I was in love with and committed to. He and subsequently my husband are the only two partners I've had.

For some people, especially women, it's a fairly big deal. Sex itself is a big deal to me. That is, I think intimacy needs to mean something and be backed by love, ideally. Not everyone's that way. But for women who feel virginity is an important gift to be bestowed on someone, I think it's about keeping lovemaking private and special and only sharing that level of intimacy with a very special person rather than simply being about the first-time experience itself. Frankly, there's a lot to be said for having some experience in that area and being fully "broken in"!

i totally agree, giving up your virginity means far more to girls than boys, i was happy just to be getting laid, but now i'm happily married love making is so much more than sex

[40oz]

I was 17...

Men are biologically motivated to spread their seeds to as many partners as possible, so there is a better chance of getting more offspring. Women, since they can only have one baby a year are biologically motivated to find a partner that will be a good provider.

As for the virginity thing, girls do put a little too much importance on it I think. I'm really glad that I lost my virginity to someone I really cared about instead of some random slut, but besides that who cares.

I had a conversation with a lesbian once who told me that all girls go crazy over the guy they loose their virginity to. Based on my experience so far there is a lot of truth to that statement so I try to pop as few cherries as possible.

[birdgirl73]

I don't think it's so much that girls "go crazy" over the guy they lose their virginity to. That very much depends on the guy and the experience itself. Remember, there are plenty of women whose first sexual experiences occur under less-than-ideal circumstances such as assault.

I think it's that we always remember the first "lover" very keenly and that he occupies a sort of special place in our hearts.

[napolitana869]

I dont regret losing it when I did (I was 16), but I wish I had realized that the guy was scum from the beginning rather than spend a year and a half figuring it out. I like to think of it as a learning experience.

[Skink]

15 and it was a teacher...

[rebgirl420]

Under 13 and I dont regret it at all.

[crudemood]

I want to do it with someone I love now.. that one time was just pure curiosity.. I'm waiting for you.

[hempplaya]

15:jointsmile:

[LIP]

I was 14 and i shagged a 17 year old bird who i'd only been with a week in a room with another couple and a spoon - that was a good party.

[zeebo phillips]

14...I don't regret it. At all.

[KingsBlend420]

16, perfect age for me, not too old, not too young. It gave me enough of time to play the field and find someone that was actually worth something.

[420MissHighTimes420]

15 I regret who I lost it to though, he was such a noodle.

[TommyJ]

16, probably had opportunities to do it before then, but for some reason I thought I'd feel bad about myself.

For someone above... under 13 and DIDN'T regret it?

[cannabis=freedom]

It's like Parolles' speech in Act I, scene i of All's Well That Ends Well:

"There's little can be said in't; 'tis against the rule of nature. To speak on the part of virginity is to accuse your mothers, which is most infallible disobedience. He that hangs himself is a virgin; virginity murders itself, and should be buried in highways, out of all sanctified limit, as a desperate offendress against nature. Virginity breeds mites, much like a cheese; consumes itself to the very paring, and so dies with feeding his own stomach. Besides, virginity is peevish, proud, idle, made of self-love, which is the most inhibited sin in the canon. Keep it not; you cannot choose but lose bt't. Out with't. Within ten year it will make itself ten, which is a goodly increase, and the principal itself not much the worse. Away with't."

During this scene he's talking to a hot chick, so I can only imagine his motives for telling her to fuck virginity.

...having said that, lost it at 16. Nothing to regret.

[big smoke07]

Yea i saw that to having sex at 12 is ridiculous.

[40oz]

If you don't regret the sex you had when you were under 13 then you're still not old enough to realize what that means. Or you could jsut live with no regrets, but that is very young.

[cannabis=freedom]

You guys who are bashing the under 13 sex...:

I know it's unusual and it shocks us, but I think we have to understand that sexuality isn't the same for everybody, and it really isn't the huge deal that society makes it out to be....

Basically, sex is a human function like eating and shitting. Society has artificially created greater significance.

[Beano]

Lost mine when i was 19 :)

Couldn't of lost it to a better girl, too.

[40oz]

You guys who are bashing the under 13 sex...:

I know it's unusual and it shocks us, but I think we have to understand that sexuality isn't the same for everybody, and it really isn't the huge deal that society makes it out to be....

Basically, sex is a human function like eating and shitting. Society has artificially created greater significance.

No, at least from my perspective it has nothing to do with society, it has to do with the fact that if you are 12 years old or younger, your genitals barley even work yet and kids that age should be having super soaker battles, not making babies.

[jdub61]

hell, i don't think i masturbated by myself for the first time until i was like 13-14, i definitely didn't have sex on my mind at age 12...

[napolitana869]

I love super soakers

[Dave Byrd]

I was not quite 17. It was my friend's older sister, who was nearly 18 and a total nympho-babe.

[M3nt0R]

lol im still chillen

[Not An Addict]

15..I'm 'bout 18 now and still with her.

[unconscious]

I'm losing my virginity this summer to the girl I'm gonna spend the rest of my life with. =]

I'm 15.

[LIP]

I'm losing my virginity this summer to the girl I'm gonna spend the rest of my life with. =]

I'm 15.

If you do, you'll be lucky. Life isnt like that. At your age that isnt at all realistic - but if the thought of it keeps you happy then good for you.

[unconscious]

If you do, you'll be lucky. Life isnt like that. At your age that isnt at all realistic - but if the thought of it keeps you happy then good for you.

I know, many people think that. I think this is different though, I'm pretty positive this is different.

I wish I could explain, but idk. Whatever I say people think it's my age, and I'm naive and stuff. No one understands. But I'll let you know how we're doin in 10 or so years. :D

Most couples need time apart and stuff... but we're together every second we can be. We fight but even when we do, we feel awful when we're apart. Idk how many couples can't stand being AWAY from each other for even 5 minutes... I miss her when she goes to the bathroom for God's sake.

[LIP]

I know, many people think that. I think this is different though, I'm pretty positive this is different.

I wish I could explain, but idk. Whatever I say people think it's my age, and I'm naive and stuff. No one understands. But I'll let you know how we're doin in 10 or so years. :D

Most couples need time apart and stuff... but we're together every second we can be. We fight but even when we do, we feel awful when we're apart. Idk how many couples can't stand being AWAY from each other for even 5 minutes... I miss her when she goes to the bathroom for God's sake.

Well, goodluck. Just make sure you dont get her up the duff, you dont want babino's at your age.

[unconscious]

Well, goodluck. Just make sure you dont get her up the duff, you dont want babino's at your age.

Hahaha hell no dude, we'll be careful. She doesn't even want kids... no way I'm havin some little shits botherin me when I'm trying to study for a chemistry test... rofl.

[jdub61]

i feel that nobody can be sure about anything in their life (what theyre gonna do, who theyre gonna marry, etc.) until after a year or so of college. then life starts to become more clear. starts to.

[khronik]

How long have you guys been together? Because what you're describing is infatuation, and that doesn't last forever. The sooner you learn that the better.

I read some statistics on divorce a while back. The older you are when you get married, the less likely you are to get divorced, up until you're about 25, when the rates level off. As you get older and you mature, your personalities change, and very well might diverge. I wish you luck, just don't make any long-term plans that would get screwed up if you decide that you don't like each other anymore.

Anyway, my first time was with a cute vietnamese girl i'd known for a few weeks, but we realized we weren't that compatible after a while, and besides, we lived too far apart. I was 22 though, and I had recently got out of a relationship with a very religious girl that gave me blue balls religiously, and I sort of wanted to release that frustration.

But on that same note, my girlfriend right now is a virgin and she wants to lose her virginity to me, and I'm kind of nervous because I've never been first for a girl before. I feel honored, and I want it to be good for her.

[blazed_babe]

i feel that nobody can be sure about anything in their life (what theyre gonna do, who theyre gonna marry, etc.) until after a year or so of college. then life starts to become more clear. starts to.

i agree with this. i've been through many an infatuation, where i thought it was gonna last forever, but no. people change and develop...i'm a much different person than i was before i started college, and i'm a junior in college right now. i've already been engaged once, and we both thought we were going to last, had a lot of our life planned out...but sometimes things just don't go the way you planned...because, like i said, people change.

but unconscious, i wish you the best of luck, maybe you will be with her forever :) you never know

as for being under the age of 13 and losing your virginity...wow. i understand that everyone develops their sexuality at different rates, but i have to agree with 40 oz, 12 year olds should be focusing on being kids, and not making babies....maybe there are exceptions, but not a single 12 year old i know is mentally and emotionally ready for sex

i lost my virginity when i was 16, and i really regret who i lost it to. i would give anything to go back and change it, because it was horrible (i'm not saying the sex was horrible, the situation was)

[BabyFacedAbortion]

13 and I regret it. I wish I saved it for someone special.

[cannabis=freedom]

Sex is nothing more or less than sticking it in and thrusting and trying to make it feel really good.

Seriously, the hype society has made out of it is ridiculous.

[Bogart]

Actually I lost my virginity because of a violent rape and torture by 2 another man who was 3 times my age.

[LuckyG]

^^^^
Holy hell, that's rough Bogart. Sorry to hear that. :(


A friend and I were talking about memory, specifically how it related to my cannabis use. I had come to the conclusion that, as most of your daily life is forgotten in a few days or even a few moments, it wasn't particularly important that you weren't stoned whenever you damn well pleased. (Don't jump all over me for that one, my memory doesn't suffer at all even while I'm high - in fact, long-term memory improves I've found.) He made the counterpoint that while daily life might not be remembered, new experiences will be - most memories you recall are those where something different happened to you other than the norm.

Anyhow, long story short, you will remember losing your virginity much better than most sexual experiences you will ever have, so why not make it special so that you have something nice to remember? Case in point, aforementioned friend made a drunken mistake when he lost his, and he regrets it and will continue to regret it for a long time.

That makes it sound like he knocked her up. He didn't, it was just a horrible idea.

[Veratyr Star]

I was 16

[wannabehippiegirl]

I'm a virgin :)

[ScaryMissMary]

I was 15 and I wish I could have saved it for someone who actually loved me.

[bluntblaze]

i was 13 not long into high school and there was a lot of good looking girls going about.
Anyway i had sex with this 15 year old chick after school and we went to her house and i banged her.

I dont regret it.. I have sex regularly now so i was gonna lose it some time and plus its only sex as... long as im rubberd up and ready to go its all good. Its fun ... Like smoking weed is, just make sure you keep it safe ( i dont want little bluntblazes running about just yet or a diseased wang for that matter) :thumbsup:

[GraziLovesMary]

Ive been obsessed with sex since I was 4 or 5, no joke. Maybe even younger, but I didnt start fuckin around til I was like 5. Ive been eating pussy for 17 years, but I decided to wait for somebody I really loved to actually have sex, and I dont regret it. When I was 17 my girlfriend and I lost our virginities to each other, and I dont regret it at all. She was the first girl I really truly loved, and although we didnt stay together that was partly my fault. She had daddy issues and we had moved really fast. She wanted to take a break to clear her head and the only thing I could think was "she just wants to go get dick now that shes not a virgin anymore." Needless to say that wasnt the case, but I wouldnt take her back despite months of her begging :( I feel bad now because she totally turned into a freak and now she has a kid at 24. The only other people Ive had sex with was my friends aunt(rape, lol.. no seriously.. some of you know the story), my last girlfriend, and her best friend. The only one I regret was my friends aunt. I wish to god I had fucked my friend instead.. shes like my last girlfriends twin.. only the good half :( Seriously... same birthday, same boobs, same pussy, same fuckin EVERYTHING, down to what condiments they like and hate, and what they order at Taco Bell... its fuckin wierd. I think Im rambling......

[Mississippi Steve]

Virginity is like a baloon....one prick and its gone.

I lost mine when I was 18 and a senior in HS. It took me a while before I found an experienced woman to teach me how to make love, not just have sex or fuck.
Those who know the difference, understand what I am saying. Those who don't, maybe you will be fortunate enough to have a partner with the patience to teach you.

[420budtoker420]

wow evryones jumping on rebgirl just cuz she had sex before 13, so what? It doesnt mayyer when it happens, if she says she doesnt regret i,then she doesnt,

[x-Lollypopcicle-x]

i understand that but i see being under 13 as being a child, some one must understand wot im sayin.. your body hasnt even developed proper at that age!!!

[Mississippi Steve]

I can't say that I agree with somebody losing their virginity at 13, but its not my body, an I don't have to live with it.

If she is ok with it, then thats a good thing. If she's not ok with it, then thats between her, and GOD.

If she decides to discuss it with *ANYBODY ELSE*, then its up to them to listen, and not be judgemental. if she asks for advice, she isn't looking to be bashed, or approval, she will most likely be looking for a way to deal with it, or at the least, just be able to vent.

[HighTillIDie]

...muahahahahahahahahahah

[stinkyattic]

i understand that but i see being under 13 as being a child, some one must understand wot im sayin.. your body hasnt even developed proper at that age!!!

That's all well and good but you need to be more respectful when making that point.
Your wrath is better directed at an older person who has sex with a 13 year old, rather than the child herself, who is not old enough to really understand the finer points of statutory rape.

This thread has been cleaned up, hardcore newbie, thanks for the heads up but I had to remove the post where you quoted Lolly...

[LuckyG]

The only other people Ive had sex with was my friends aunt(rape, lol.. no seriously.. some of you know the story), my last girlfriend, and her best friend. The only one I regret was my friends aunt.

This just seems wierd to me because in a lot of your other posts you give the impression that you're constantly gettin' it on with a lot of different women. I mean, no problems with it, doesn't change my opinion of you (which is a good one :thumbsup:) but I was just kind of surprised to read that.


Oh, and I don't know if I posted it before but I'm still a virgin as well.

[Mariusvlatkorova]

I'm 20 and still a virgin. I don't know if that's a good or a bad thing... I think I'm too shy. This one time I was at a pro cannabis protest and some random hot chick asked me if I smoked and I said no :(

[bluntblaze]

I was 14 and i shagged a 17 year old bird who i'd only been with a week in a room with another couple and a spoon - that was a good party.

a spoon!?!? lip... you dirty bugger. lol:D

[EternalOverdose]

im still a virgin and im fifteen ,ive had opportunities, but i want it to be special

[GraziLovesMary]

This just seems wierd to me because in a lot of your other posts you give the impression that you're constantly gettin' it on with a lot of different women. I mean, no problems with it, doesn't change my opinion of you (which is a good one :thumbsup:) but I was just kind of surprised to read that.


Oh, and I don't know if I posted it before but I'm still a virgin as well.

Hehe common misconception. I have alot of sexual experience, but as far as intercourse, not a shitload of different partners. Now as far as oral sex and other stuff thats different... But my last girlfriend alone I have had sex with thousands of times, and her and I had sex with her best friend a few hundred times. Fun times, fun times. But yeah, usually I allow that misconception to perpetuate, but I felt it was important to be honest here.

[bcubed]

i feel that nobody can be sure about anything in their life (what theyre gonna do, who theyre gonna marry, etc.) until after a year or so of college. then life starts to become more clear. starts to.


I gotta disagree on this one...I went to college for two years (Carnegie-Mellon, physics, HATED it) on Ma+Pa's nickel, and I don't think I matured so much as aged...then I dropped out, got a job delivering mail, which I held for 6yrs before going back to school. You grow up fast when it's YOU making sure that the rent gets paid, your 401(k) vested, etc. Plus there's something meaningful in assuring your own existence for the first time in your life. If I should be so lucky to have children, they're supporting themselves for AT LEAST 1yr before they get college $$ from me. Not only will they grow up, it'll ensure that they don't become self-satisfied pricks who can't fathom the sense of being worried about feeding themselves, paying the rent...make 'em appreciate the working person, whether they wind up blue-collar or not.

Oh, and as for losing it: a very sore subject. I lost it about 2days after 18 b-day, to a woman I loved, but whose mental disorders became more apparent as we spent time together (Not a swipe--she was legitamately crazy--I still loved her, but saw that marriage would have been disasterous). However, my stepma's friend (25 yrs my senior) came onto me when I was 15--the first woman ever to do so in a serious manner. Recent looking back upon my life told me that THIS WAS THE WOMAN I WAS MEANT TO LOSE MY VIRGINITY TO! I no longer think sex is appropriate, but I need to find a way to reach her and explain this to her (don't remember her name + don't want to compromise her privacy with my stepma).

[rebgirl420]

Wow I havent even read this after I posted. Get off my ass people. I matured when I was 9, and had sex at 11. I dont regret it at all. I knew what I was doing too. Worry about your own sexual health. Im just fine and dandy of mine. I enjoyed it. I asked for it. And I liked the person that was involved. Some people just mature older.

[bluntblaze]

Wow I havent even read this after I posted. Get off my ass people. I matured when I was 9, and had sex at 11. I dont regret it at all. I knew what I was doing too. Worry about your own sexual health. Im just fine and dandy of mine. I enjoyed it. I asked for it. And I liked the person that was involved. Some people just mature older.

go reb!

lol :)

[igot4cheep]

I think I was 15 or 16 I cant remember. But I remember the girl and it suck the first time. I sure hope she reads this.

[JD1stTimer]

I hit the wrong button. I hit 25+ and I should have hit never. Crudemood: I love your avatar. Let's do it as soon as I visit your part of Canada! ;) j/k

[Tripn07]

...not yet, Im 21 and its getting rediculous. I swear im not gay or waiting for mairage lol. Im a pretty shy dude also, I never really learned good comunication skills so hopefully I can find a quicky soon and get er done.

[CUPNOODLES]

I LOST IT WEN I WUZ 12 2 MY GIRLFRIEND WHO APPEARENTLY WAS NOT 1.....I AM LIVING PROOF THAT GUYS CAN BE RAPED BY GIRLS....:)

[Iambreathingin]

15 and it was a teacher...


Congrats on being sexually abused.

Oral at 16, sex at 18. First time I had sex it just sort of happend alot of times over that week with 2 people. They both knew, our relationships were very open and understanding.

Don't be worried, guys. I was, but I shouln't have been. Most natural thing in the world.

Oh, to the girl who is suppsoed to have matured at 9, that is pretty abnormal....If you're whom you say you are then fantastic but I have to take all forum obsessed females with a pinch of salt ;)

Note: Having sex early doesn't make you a badass :p Just wait until you feel confident and ready and you won't regret it.