akfa
04-24-2007, 11:33 PM
Weird shit! I'm in the process of enlisting in the Navy and becoming a fucking squid, but I wasn't planning on taking physical or doing any kind of drug tests for ATLEAST one more month. So i had been clean for about 1.5 months, and two nights ago one of my best buddies came by and he's like whats up wanna chill? So we did, and I had some weed from when I stopped smoking, and I asked if he wants to smoke, cause he's a regular toker. He was like no, not without you. So i said fuck it i wont test for the navy for atleast another month, lets toke. He said cool so we smoked like 4 fat fucking bowls loaded w/ keef ontop. Then, TODAY I was gonna go take my ASVAB so I could get ready to select my career for the navy when i go to my physical next month, my recruiter calls me and he's like 'So you ready for the test? Come by at 1, im going to take you down there and im going to give you a urinalysis while your here' I was like OH SHIT! And i told him straight up, 'chief, I just smoked like 2 days ago, I dont think thats a good idea I'm going to fail this test.' and he was disappointed but he was like lets take the test anyway, so i said okay.
So that was at just before 11am CST this morning, and I was like fucking A fucking calling me and making me piss test fucking A! I was pretty pissed. So i Just started chugging water as much as I could as fast as I could, had to be there at 1 so I stopped at about 12:15 and just let myself piss repeatedly, as much as I could, and then I went down there at 1 and he gave me the speech about he needs committment from me and if Im for real about joining I cant toke up. I said ok, cool. So we went to get the test out of the way and I pissed in his cup and he went inthe bathroom to test it and he came out and hes like 'jaryd, come here...' so i went over and this is how the convo went.
"Did you seriously smoke?"
"Yeah, 2 nights ago"
"What did you smoke?"
"Weed, i told you. i smoked like 4 bowls."
"Are you serious? Cuz this shit came back negative."
"........i dunno man, I did smoke Im not lying to you chief."
"Was it good weed? Did you feel anything?"
"Yeah dude..i mean..i dont wanna sound weird but if you wanna be straight up honest I was fucking ripped. I ate like 3 chicken sandwiches and a pint of ice cream"
And he just started laughing and hes like thats awesome! you passed! im proud. WTF? hahaha. that was crazy shit! he ended up testing me for EVERY drug he could, and they all came back negative, and he tested me twice too. cool! i got lucky.
EDIT: tonight is my last night for toking, im gonna be fuckin blazed! :hippy: :hippy: :hippy: :hippy:
So that was at just before 11am CST this morning, and I was like fucking A fucking calling me and making me piss test fucking A! I was pretty pissed. So i Just started chugging water as much as I could as fast as I could, had to be there at 1 so I stopped at about 12:15 and just let myself piss repeatedly, as much as I could, and then I went down there at 1 and he gave me the speech about he needs committment from me and if Im for real about joining I cant toke up. I said ok, cool. So we went to get the test out of the way and I pissed in his cup and he went inthe bathroom to test it and he came out and hes like 'jaryd, come here...' so i went over and this is how the convo went.
"Did you seriously smoke?"
"Yeah, 2 nights ago"
"What did you smoke?"
"Weed, i told you. i smoked like 4 bowls."
"Are you serious? Cuz this shit came back negative."
"........i dunno man, I did smoke Im not lying to you chief."
"Was it good weed? Did you feel anything?"
"Yeah dude..i mean..i dont wanna sound weird but if you wanna be straight up honest I was fucking ripped. I ate like 3 chicken sandwiches and a pint of ice cream"
And he just started laughing and hes like thats awesome! you passed! im proud. WTF? hahaha. that was crazy shit! he ended up testing me for EVERY drug he could, and they all came back negative, and he tested me twice too. cool! i got lucky.
EDIT: tonight is my last night for toking, im gonna be fuckin blazed! :hippy: :hippy: :hippy: :hippy: