Is this cool?

[GHoSToKeR]

There's this buddy of mine (I'll call him X) that I've been hanging out and smoking with alot for the last couple of years, I always thought he was kinda cool, if not a bit weird, but that his weirdness was just a part of who he is. He's slightly confrontational, for example if I were to disagree with something he said, he would take it personally and say "why do you have to always disagree with me when you know you're wrong?", that kind of thing. Really kind of patronising, condescening on occasion...

Anyway, recently we all bought a bunch of tickets to go and see an awesome band in England this summer. Something fucked up with the ticket agency and half of us lost our money. Then something came up and I realised I wouldn't be able to afford it anyway, so I offered to sell my ticket to one of the people that X was gonna bring with him.. So she gave the money for the ticket to him, and he was supposed to give it to me. He gave me some of it, but then apparantly, when we were at a club and I ran out of cash, I told him not to worry about giving me the rest of it.. I'm sometimes a generous guy, but I'm a broke student, and that's not something I would say right now. Anyway since then he's totally refusing to give me the rest of the money, on the basis of me apparantly telling him not to worry about it.

This guy is loaded, and I'm a broke student. The money isn't the main issue, it's the principle, but at the same time it is an issue aswell. If I wasn't so broke and didn't REALLY need the money, I'd just tell him to fuck off and stop hanging out with him, not because of the money but just because I don't wanna hang with people like that..

What would you do in this situation, and would you still hang out with someone who acts like that? Bear in mind I'm way too mellow to be confrontational and stuff...

[ilikerabbits]

most deferently

[smoke it]

sounds like an asshole. either deal with him or tell him to fuck off.

[stinkyattic]

He's slightly confrontational, for example if I were to disagree with something he said, he would take it personally and say "why do you have to always disagree with me when you know you're wrong?", that kind of thing. Really kind of patronising, condescening on occasion......This is what you should be worrying about...

.
Anyway since then he's totally refusing to give me the rest of the money, on the basis of me apparantly telling him not to worry about it.
...... you can't take that back. Even if you were feeling drunk and unusually generous, a gift is a gift and you have to live with it.

I'd examine other parts of the friendship, like the guy's tendency to be a complete prick.

[mfqr]

He sounds like a real jackass. It's still technically your money, even though you told him not to worry about it. Just throw some technicalities at him, and say, "I didn't necessarily say that I never wanted it, I just said don't worry about it, and it was a momentary thing. I need the money now, and I'd really appreciate it if you gave it to me." Also, have you ever smoked him out before? More than once, perhaps? If so, just tell him that you've been generous to him and have smoked him out many times. It's not his money anyway, it's YOURS. It doesn't give him a right to take part of the ticket money when he had nothing to do with paying for your ticket... what a fuckhead.

I don't agree that it was a gift that you cannot take back. He was not right to pocket part of the money IN THE FIRST PLACE.

[Nocturnal Stoner]

who you gonna go see?

I don't really have any advice except for stinky's. Just talk to him, if he's a good friend he'll understand.

[GHoSToKeR]

Thanks guys..

1.5litresFold, yeah, I'm way to unconfrontational (is that a word?). Quite a few times I've brought this up with him and he automatically gets hostile.. Today he called me up, I mentioned this, and do you know what he said!? He said that this money is paying for the few times he smoked me out recently. Obviously I haven't been able to buy much weed lately, being broke, so I've relied on the generosity of others. But there was like, a year or two when that guy never even bought enough for a joint, and I was smoking him out all the time.. :(

I don't like to be petty, right? It's more the fact that it amazes me how asshole-ish people can be. Why do people feel the need to fuck their friends over like this?

Hey stinkyattic, yeah, I know what you mean.. The problem is, I don't have any memory of saying that to him, and it's not something I would have said because I need the money right now.. And even if it had been the other way round - he had told me not to worry about giving him back money I owed him - I would still give it to him because, well, that's what friends do, right?

:(

[divestoned]

I would handle it one of 2 way's whip his ass to make an example of him/break into his house and take more than he owe's...the prob there is you cant admit it was you.so even tho he is punished he doesn't know you got him(or atleast cant prove it :) ).

Dive:stoned:

[Skrappie]

"why do you have to always disagree with me when you know you're wrong?", that kind of thing. Really kind of patronising, condescening on occasion...

Youre a tough dude, that would activate me to act really ugly, really fast.

Well first of all its not okay.

Second he does not value your friendship at all, harsh but true. Even if he does see you as a good friend, he's obviously not at a point in his life where he can handle true friendship.

andabout the money,

If you really did gift it to him, thats totally your problem and mistake, but keep in mind someone who knows about your economicial situation and considered you close to them, wouldn't dick you over, even more so if they were loaded.

Cut your losses and stop dealing with someone who sees you as a pet.

[LIP]

He's taken your money. That's a big no no. He owes you money - so do what ever you have to to get it back.

Dont let him try and talk you out of it - if you have to give him a slap about.

If it's alot he owes you - give me an email.

alexroth_14[at]hotmail[dot]com

[GHoSToKeR]

Thanks for the offer, LIP.. But I'd prefer not to deal with this situation with violence, instead I'll just forget about this loser. It sucks to lose a friend more than it sucks to lose the money, but like Skrappie said, this guy doesn't value friendship (or at least not my friendship), and hanging out with him is too much like a chore..

Thanks for the repleis guys.. Have any of you been in similar situations, friends with someone you don't really like or get on with?